Sneakerheads

- -I know.

-Yes! -No, no, no.

I'm not here for you. I'm here to talk--

Whoa, whoa, whoa! Is this your baby?

-Yes, this my-- -No, no, that baby is beautiful!

Curly hair and everything.

How'd that storage unit work out?

Excuse you?

-Keep walking. -I don't have time for neither idiot.

-Let me raise your baby. -Good seeing you.

-I got you. - Ignoring me.

I'm picking up four more Concord 11s today.

Sounds good, I'll be here.

Hey. No-- Nori, right?

-Yeah. -We met last Thursday at the storage.

-And? -Well, look,

I gotta make moves, and make moves really quick.

-How much you working with? -300 bucks.

-How much you need? -

$5,000.

Oh, so you think I'm Jesus then?

I may need a miracle, yes.

-When you go in... -I know.

-you're gonna get a 7 1/2 and an 11. - Nah, you can't.

One pair per customer.

The baby makes it two customers, which is the only reason I'm doing this.

A pair for you, another pair for me.

Got it?

-Okay, I got it. -Yeah.

-Hey. -Hey, back--

Wow, you have a kid.

Ah... yeah, I actually have two.

You have two kids?

-Mm-hm. -What is this?

These aren't your size. Concord 11s, your favorite. Are you flipping?

Ah, no...

um... it's a long story.

I'm sort of in a rush.

Can we please make this transaction?

Okay. But it's still only one pair per customer.

The baby counts as a customer too.

So what's next?

We meet one of my buyers.

-You got wheels? -Of course my boy got wheels.

Let's go! Regulators, mount up!

-What are you...? -Mount up!

It ain't no fucking mount up. You not going, Bobby.

Look, I know I fucked up, man.

You're my best friend, okay?

Well I mean, I thought you were at least.

-All right, whatever. -Mount the fuck up, let's go!

Oh, hell no.

You rather walk?

Fine.

But take Lexington, not Melrose.

A-ha!

Greetings, my merry men.

You brought Little John, I see.

Seriously, this dude?

He may be green, but so is his money.

And he'll pay way more than market value.

-Hey, I'm Devin. How are you? -Good, how are you?

I have some Concord 11s.

-Are they good? -"Are they good?"

MJ himself debuted them game one

in the '95 Eastern Conference Finals.

Well, I'm from the Chi, all right? Didn't the Bulls lose that game?

Exactly.

Lost the game and series, which led to Magic getting swept by Houston,

causing Shaq to jump ship and go to Lakers, where he won three chips

with the Black Mamba.

If you think about it, these shoes right here

changed the landscape of the league forever.

All right, I'm just going to sanitize my hands real quick.

Make sure to keep it wrapped, you know what I mean?

All right.

Ooh.

Wow.

-We're on time crunch, so if you could-- -Right.

-Sorry about that, just-- -Fast forward your bullshit.

-They're the same size. -You can never be too sure.

I want to make sure it's not like a half size.

Let me just try--

-Whoa, no, whoa! -Whoa!

-Whoa, whoa! What are you doing? -You try 'em, you buy 'em.

Sold.

-Six big ones, there you go. -Thank you.

No problem, thank you. And while I have you guys here,

how much you think I can get for these?

Zero.

-Got a pair of false stars. -Yep.

Ah, you tender, tender little creature.

Listen.

The sole's starting to yellow,

the logo is fake as fuck, and, most importantly,

the stitching is sloppy as shit.

Good luck!

Fuck on me!

It's just "fuck me", by the way.

Fuck me.

-Can I help you? -I was wondering

if I could shadow you or something?

Not in a creepy way,

because shadows tend to be dark

-and-- -50 bucks.

-Huh? - 50 bucks.

That sounds fair.

An hour.

Okay, uh, that's a little less fair, but still a yes.

It's not like we don't have room.

- -Aw, yo, Devpool!

This is a sick ass whip, bro. I got the same one in tan.

What, why? These are for people with kids.

You mean to tell me someone had sex with you and conceived your children?

Oh, no such luck. I'm flattered that you assume that,

but no, no little ones for this guy.

Yo, I got shotgun!

Oh.

Holy Schnikes.

The wall's insane.

- What up, Shawn? Doing good? -What's good? How you doing?

If Stevie can get what we talked about, let me know. I got a guy.

-Already on it. -Right, thank you.

Huh.

Sick, right?

Travis Scott 1s, Supreme Foam.

Off-White Blazers.

Off-White Prestos.

Kaws 4s.

Yeezy Boost 350s.

That's crazy.

That's real crazy.

So hey, you, huh...

you come here a lot?

I work here.

You know what's crazy? I actually did a 10 year bid at Foot Locker myself.

Ask me why they let me go.

Bad behavior.

I'm a bad boy, baby.

I'm taking my break.

Wait here, and don't talk to anyone that works here.

Yeah, talk to me.

Please, tell me you got good news.

If she pulls any more bullshit, the deal's off.

You sure you want me to tell that to Stevie?

He's not a fan of people talking shit behind his back.

Suit yourself then.

I don't care who he plays for,

I'm not chasing down a pair of Rust Pink 1s

for anything less than four Gs.

Whatever, just hit me back when he makes up his mind.

Here.

Six hundred gets you these.

You're fast.

Uh, okay, ahm...

So what are we doing next?

I gotta drop these off in Alhambra,

while simultaneously getting poor Stuey here

a pair that won't get him laughed at.

Oh. No, no, no. I meant me. What do I--?

-Us, us? -No, no, no.

-No. -We are a team.

There's a music video shoot in the Valley. It starts at 2:00.

You're gonna ask for my girl Montana,

like Tony Montana from Scarface?

You call her just plain Montana, things can go a little sideways.

-Montana? -Hey, yeah.

-Yes. -Hold one second.

You're gonna go flip those

for a pair of red Off-White 1s, and then

you're gonna come back here, talk to Shawn,

tell him that those are for his guy.

No matter what you do, what you see, don't get anything else.

Now let me hear you say that.

-Don't get anything else. -Now you.

We should definitely get something.

What are you talking about? That's exactly what she told us not to do.

Look, I'm saying fuck those.

These right here? These are the shit.

We're getting those, bcause I'm gonna break even.

-That's all I care about. -Pussy says what?

-What? -What?

I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that Shawn knows a guy

that'll pay more for these bad boys than for those.

Okay, you remember Vanessa Clark?

Volleyball.

She played volleyball.

But you thought she was the hottest girl on campus until

I introduced you...

to Becca Johnson.

The theater major.

Not just any theater major, the theater major you thought

was hotter than Vanessa Clark.

-Becca Johnson, huh? -Becca Johnson.

"Big Booty" Johnson.