The Suite Life of Zack & Cody

Yo, starting a grizzly scout troop

Was a great idea.

One of my better ones.

You boys look so cute.

We're not cute. We're grizzly scouts.

We can survive anything.

all: Oh! Oh, god!

Hey, zack! Are you coming?

Zack: Are you done taking pictures?

Yes.

Wow. No one said you could dress cool.

You can't. This is not regulation.

We haven't even had our first meeting yet,

And you're already breaking the rules?

Look.

I didn't join up just to follow a bunch of dopey rules.

I joined so I could tie knots,

Climb things, and start campfires.

Basically all the stuff you do in my lobby.

Mr. Moseby, it was so nice of you

To volunteer to be troop leader.

Well...

A little discipline wouldn't hurt them.

Plus, I was a grizzly scout myself once.

It turned me into the macho man I am today.

all: Oh! Ow!

Carey, I can't see anything now.

Aww.

Ahem. Attention!

Mmm...Very good.

Don't eyeball me, son!

These shorts need to be 2 inches longer.

Would that make them regulation, sir?

No, your knees just creep me out.

Aaiiyee!

I don't believe...

The grizzly scout motto is "bikini inspector".

It is if you're camping at fort lauderdale.

I'm watching you.

Gentlemen, have a seat.

Excuse me, sir.

According to paragraph 2a, section b,

We're supposed to start this meeting by reciting

The grizzly scout secret oath.

We should recite the...

Secret oath.

Oh! Oh! No moms. Got it, right.

Sorry. Smile!

All: Ow! Oh! Come on! Carey!

All right, gentlemen, stand up!

I promise to do my best,

To be honest, helpful,

Resourceful, upright,

And to be morally sound of mind and body.

...And body.

Ah. Committing the oath to memory?

No. I'm looking for loopholes.

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Hey, maddie, do you have any spa brochures?

Oh, yeah. They're right here.

The boys are going away for 5 days,

And I thought I'd take a little r&r.

I heard they're going to the wilderness

With mr. Moseby.

Aren't you worried?

Extremely. What do you think is better,

Swedish or thai massage?

Don't ask me.

The closest thing I've ever gotten to a massage

Is when my school bus went over a huge pothole.

London. Massage. Swedish or thai?

Neither. Shiatsu with deep tissue work.

Ask for veronica. Veronica.

Oh, no. Not veronica?

No! No oneiff. I should ask should ask for cliff? For cliff.

I used to go out with that loser.

I don't ever want to see him again.

Oh. Well, veronica it is, then.

Ok...

Hi.

Hi.

Did I just see london tipton?

No. Left town. Gone. Vamoosed.

Good. 'cause...

I'm meeting my parents here for lunch,

And I do not want to run into her.

Well, all you've got is me.

Good. That's an improvement already.

All right, gentlemen.

Follow me!

Boys: Oh! Ow!

I meant one at a time.

We're out, sir.

Hey, guys. Good luck.

Have fun on your little camping trip.

This is no picnic, ma'am.

It's a tough, macho journey

Into the deep, dark unknown.

Taxi!

All right, gentlemen.

This is where we will set up our campsite.

Why here?

Well, isn't it obvious?

It's flat, dry, and high up.

Isn't that right, mr. Moseby?

No, I'm just too tired to take another step.

Works for me.

Me, too. I'm hungry.

Well, then,

Why don't you eat another one of your grizzly bars?

Oh, I ate all of those on the way up.

Here. You can have one of mine.

I ate all of yours, too.

What?

Come on, that's not very fair--

Aww, calm down--

Gentlemen, gentlemen, please, please!

We have enough food in here to last us weeks.

Including a campfire bundt cake.

So, when are we gonna build a fire,

Make bows and arrows,

And swing from vines?

Not until we are properly prepared.

First, we need to dig a trench

Around our campsite. Hmm?

You mean, to go potty?

I'm thinking I'm just gonna hold it in.

No, guys. It's in case it rains.

The trench will drain the water away from the campsite.

Cody, you are a natural.

I am promoting you

From teddy bear trooper

To koala bear trooper.

Thank you, sir.

I'm so proud I can hardly bear it.

Wow, tough forest.

Ahh...

Boy, your knots have got knots.

It's called having twin boys.

They're away for the whole week,

And I miss 'em terribly. Ohh...

oh, no, they're back!

Carey, I'm sorry. But I've got a big problem.

Cliff parks asked me out.

He's smart, he's handsome, and he's rich.

Wow, that is a problem.

Does he have a brother?

Is he a brother?

No, no. The problem is

He dated london 2 years ago.

Wait, is this the guy she was running away from

In the lobby? Yes.

Oh. Well, 2 years is a long time.

Go with my blessing.

Aw, thanks carey.

Oh, could you loan me something to wear?

Sure. Oh, that feels so good.

The date's in 10 minutes.

I'll be right back.

Fine by me.

I get paid whether you're here or not.

Scoutmaster moseby!

Yes, trooper cody?

Look what I found.

A wildiferus florididae. Ooh.

It's very rare. And it has a wonderful bloom

That will dress up any campsite.

Mm. Good work, cody.

You just earned your pansy badge.

Ooh! Good job!

Remember to put it next to your petunia pin.

You know, my maple leaf...

Actually smells like maple.

I don't understand why my oak leaf

Doesn't smell like oak.

That's because it's poison oak.

That would explain the itching.

Don't worry, I have medicine for that.

And one more thing, it is critical that you don't--

What?

Touch anyone.

Right.

Cody: Oh, no!

We've been ransacked by a bear!

Yeah. A bear with the feet of a raccoon.

Oh, no!

We've been ransacked by a bearcoon!

Oh, yes, these are raccoon tracks.

Good work, trooper zack.

Learn that?

Tv.

They dragged off all our food.

What? That's terrible.

That duffel bag was part of a matching set.

Way to focus on the real problem.

Cody, didn't I ask you