Lie Exposed

Frank?

Frank, what time is it?

Get out.

Frank?

Frank?

Uh, Frank?

Yeah, Jerry? What is it?

Jerry, is Frank there?

Mel, I'm right here.

Are we ready?

Yeah. We're ready.

Okay.

Um...

Shit. Mmf!

You okay? You need some help?

Ugh, God... Just fat...

I'm just fat!

Am I really this fat?

- How can I be fat?! - You're not fat!

Do you know what time it is?

Well, yeah. Actually...

We're ready?

I'm ready. Jerry's ready.

It's 7:30.

Okay.

Um...

Wow. You look...

Don't say fat.

I wasn't gonna say fat.

Okay.

Vinyl...

bar... Jerry...

Say hello, Jerry.

- Hi, Melanie. - Hey.

Well, you're a lifesaver.

You gonna be okay with that?

Huh? Hey, yeah.

Okay. Don't kill yourself.

And you look nice.

Thought so.

Huh. So... they're up?

They're up.

Aw, Jesus.

Ooh...

Fucking anxiety.

Oh my God.

You alright?

Do you want a glass of water?

Jerry...

Is it too late to cancel?

Well, if this is what it's gonna do to you,

of course we can cancel.

No. We can't.

It's just...

Thank you.

Whose idea was this, anyway?

What, the things? Or showing them?

Fucking lawyers, always with the questions.

All of it. Any of it.

Why don't we just call it God's will?

God. Nope. Haven't seen him.

You're beautiful. You got that goin' for ya.

What's that quote? "Eighty percent of life

is just showing up"?

I think it's actually "80 percent of sex

is just showing up."

That would explain so much.

Ow.

Too late to call it off.

Real question is what happens later.

Is it better or worse?

How do you deal with it?

Well, thank you all for coming.

Uh, you know, the first time

I ever really looked at a painting, I was just a kid.

I was going to school in the States.

And it was Van Gogh, "Portrait of a Peasant".

And I took this girl to the museum

to impress her, and, uh...

And I saw this painting, and I walked up to it, and...

I look at the world,

and it feels like there's something...

waiting?

Like it's been there all along - I just wasn't looking for it.

You remember when I said,

"I can handle it; you don't have to be strong

for the two of us"?

I was lying.

And that, that's pretty much all I've got

by way of an introduction, so...

...uh...

because...

well, just because.

So make of it what you will.

Alright. Anytime, Jerry.

What I think I meant was

"If it gets really bad, I'll have a drink."

And it did...

And I did.

And then...

Jesus...

Where we met...

...I went without you.

I went without you because...

I wanted to walk in alone one more time,

maybe meet you again.

That's really why I went alone.

Second opinion?

Fuck off.

Second chance?

Same thing.

Hope?

We never got to drink together.

That's a fucking shame.

I think about what kind of drunk you'd be.

I do.

Pants. Wait. What did I say? "Plants"?

No, I'm not wearing plants.

The sheets are nice.

They're super soft.

You'd like it.

You know what?

Who am I kidding?

Drinking's not that bad. It's kind of good.

It actually works - like magic.

The bottle on my lips

was a kiss from Prince Charming.

The rotting stopped for a little while.

I was whole again. That didn't suck.

It's the stuff that comes along with it that sucks...

like that guy who...

and then my tights were down around my ankles, and...

Did I let him? I don't...

In the bathroom? I don't remember.

Did I throw up on him? Or was that someone else?

I know I missed the bed.

Yep...

I know it's impossible to get puke out of sequins...

and feathers...

my hair...

They say alcoholism is a disease.

I say, "Fuck you. Cancer is a disease.

It's a whole different thing.

Alcoholism is just a good idea

taken a little too far."

But I kept waking up.

I'm such a pussy.

Apparently, I'm not quite done yet.

I had to come back, one ugly day at a time.

Fourteen days, twelve hours.

Fourteen days, twelve hours. Fourteen days, twelve hours.

That's the truth.

It's awful.

Do you remember how we used to say

we'd be there for each other

for anything?

If the other one drank,

or was paralyzed,

or, uh,

went crazy.

I used to wonder, what if your time comes,

and I can't do it?

Now, it's "What if you can't do it?"

You'd hide it, but I'd see it in your eyes.

I'm just not that strong.

Hello?

Hello, hello?

The photographs?

I don't know.

Maybe I was thinking...

rebirth?

I mean, why not?

If we look here,

you can see...

I saw "The Devil in Miss Jones, Part IV"

at a bachelorette party,

and all I can think of as I'm watching this movie

is "Those are people, right?

They're actors.

They're people."

I need a dress.

I was an actor, once upon a time.

That's it, huh?

I could hit my mark.

And I was on time.

And I could learn my lines.

I just felt like an asshole all the time.

What was I talking about, in the movie?

Lois Ayres?

Lois Ayres, I think, was her name.

She's an actor, by the way, just like me. Actor.

I mean, not just like me, but anyway...

She accidentally overdoses or something,

and because she's a good Catholic girl,

she has to go to hell

because she overdosed,

because she committed suicide,

even though it was a mistake.

She doesn't want to go to hell.

She wants to go home.