Wizards of Waverly Place

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Fowerd. ???

Now, let's get out there and walk."

Justin, are you sure you don't want to do my graduation speech?

It goes like this...

"Later, losers."

There he is. Our graduating senior.

We got you some graduation presents, sweetie.

Thank you, Mom, but shouldn't you wait to give me this until after I graduate?

Don't be ridiculous.

You're the only one of our kids who we know is gonna make it through high school.

We're excited.

- It's a new briefcase! - Aww, thank you.

Although, technically, it's called an attaché case.

We know, honey. We just didn't want you running around saying, "Attaché. Attaché."

Well, you know, I got Justin a graduation present, too.

Yeah, sure you did. Good one, sweetie.

Um, I think she's serious, you guys.

Then we gotta get out of here.

My eyebrows just grew back from her last gift. Come on.

Can you believe them?

Assuming I'm about to do something so bad they had to leave the room?

Harper, sit down.

OK, now this is a little tricky

because my gift is not something that technically can be wrapped.

Oh my gosh. It is fire.

Stop, drop and roll! Stop, drop and roll!

Wait, come on. Harper, you guys, hear me out.

- OK, my gift to you... - Hmm.

...is that, four years ago, I used magic to create a duplicate of you

- and I sent him off to college. - What?

- Yeah, and he's about to graduate. - What?!

So, basically, I just saved you from like four more years of school.

What?!?!

I have to agree with Justin on this one. What?!

Alex, why would you make a duplicate of me?

I was actually looking forward to the next four years of college.

I was finally gonna try that notebook paper with the skinnier lines.

I did this because family is important to me, Justin.

I'm so sorry for wanting to do something nice for my brother.

Oh, family is important to you?

I needed a heartwarming lead in. I don't...

Harper, would you please tell Justin that he's overreacting

and this is actually a good thing?

It is a good thing. I can use the new Justin

to make Zeke and the old Justin jealous. Then they can fight...

...over me.

I don't think it's gonna work. I think the old Justin heard me.

Look, Justin, it will be fine, OK?

Once your duplicate comes, I'll put your brains back together,

and you can keep all of his memories plus a college degree

without having to go away to college.

Everything is going according to plan.

And how can you be so sure about that?

Because I kept a scrapbook of all of your duplicate's accomplishments

over the past four years.

If you think your high school experience was impressive,

wait till you see what you did in college.

OK, you made straight A's every semester.

Big deal. I always get straight A's.

You were voted Most Analytical Brain by the Intramural Chess Team.

I was? You know that award is special

because it comes from your peers, which is...

You know what? Maybe this isn't bad.

Maybe you're right. Maybe this is a good thing after all.

I knew that chess thing would change your mind.

There's actually nothing else in this scrapbook.

Nope. Nothin'. Nothin'.

Jerry, I've been thinking.

Is it about eating or ways to save money?

Please say, "Eating!" Please say, "Eating!"

It's about being better parents.

Oh, well, that's not as interesting to me, but... go ahead.

You know how we never make it to the kids' school functions

in time to sit in the auditorium?

And we always end up sitting in the overflow section,

watching on a video monitor with the rest of the bad parents?

That school has an auditorium?

Well, I thought it would be nice if we really tried

to make it to Justin's graduation ceremony on time.

That's a great idea, honey. Because we're better than those other bad parents.

And getting there on time is just the way to prove it to them.

Exactly.

And everyone knows the best thing about being good parents

is getting to tell as many people about it as possible.

Hi. We'll walk you out. We're about to be really great parents.

Their school has an auditorium.

I don't know how I'm supposed to do this, Alex.

I've never met a duplicate of myself before.

Just relax. It'll be fine.

But what do I say to him? Do I shake his hand

or do I do that thing like we're both looking in the mirror?

He's you, Justin. Just do what you would want someone to do to you.

In that case, I'll compliment him on his ascot.

What's an ascot?

Come on, it's a silk man scarf

that cartoony millionaires wear around their necks.

Usually they're on boats. Which is...

- Is he here yet? - Harper, what are you wearing?

This is a college man we're talking about, Alex.

I had to choose something from my mature collection.

Well, does that dress come with a horse and buggy?

It's parked out back, and someone isn't getting a ride in it.

Oh, my gosh. Look. Here I come.

Aw, man, I'm not wearing an ascot.

All right. Let's do this.

He's not doing it.

Oh, I get it. Tai chi, man.

He is wearing a fancy man scarf, but on his head.

And it's a bandana.

But why would I wanna hide my hair?

Oh my gosh. I've stopped conditioning regularly.

Justin, wait up.

Don't call me Justin.

I only go by my spirit name, Bursting Eagle.

OK, Exploding Bird,

Uh, I think that there is someone you should meet.

All right, fine, if that's why you called me down here.

But I think there's someone that you should meet: your inner self.

No thanks. I'm good with my outer self.

- In the meantime... - What happened to you?

College. It changed me.

I took an Introductory Philosophy course

and I realized that there are much more important things in life

than being a know-it-all.

Name one!

Uh, the stark beauty of silence, man.

What are you talking about...?

Shhh.

There it is.

It's beautiful. It kind of breaks my heart too.

I... I...

Look, I don't know why you are acting like this.

OK, you were given awards from the chess team.

No, no, no. Society does not determine my value. This does.

A dirty, leather necklace?

No. I was pointing to my heart.

I determine what's important to me.

No, no, no. I determine what's important to you.

You're supposed to be at college, having the experiences that I've always dreamed about.

Well maybe it's time you started dreaming with this, man.

My heart?

No, I'm talking about this dirty leather dreamcatcher.

Alex, I need to speak to you real quick for one minute!

Hey, where are you guys going? Secrets are for people who have something to hide.

Look what you've done! I am a total mess.

This guy is a total mess. I am a total mess.

Relax, man.

Oh, don't you start now.

Don't worry.

Look, we'll recombine the two of you. That'll get rid of him.

But you'll get to keep all of his knowledge and memories.

All right! Just get him into the Lair!

Alex, part of your gift was recombining us and you didn't even look that up?

Well, four years ago I thought I would have learned a lot more by now.

So excuse me for shooting too high.

Wait a minute. Here's something.

What is it?

It's a spell to duplicate money.

Why has that not been a wizard lesson?

- Alex! - Sorry.

Why isn't he helping?

Helping people's a weakness, man.

It means you're trying to fill a void in your own life.

Or you're like just too tired or something.

You know, I was rethinking you, but now I'm gonna go back to what I originally thought.

You're a dirty creep.

And your honesty is like a ray of sunshine.

Wait! Here it is! OK.

OK.

Two of him aren't twice as fun. Turn these Justins back to one.

Huh. Look at that. It worked.

And to think, this is usually around the time

when things take an unexpected turn for the worse.

It's nice to have you back, Justin.

- Yeah? What's so great about it? - Excuse me?

What's so great about anything in this crazy, mixed-up world we're living in, man?

Oh, no.

I don't care about graduating high school,

and I don't care about aliens or robots,

and I sure n't care about grades.

I agree.

Grades are just a way of telling you how you're doing in school.

And I don't think that's anyone's business.

Exactly. You get it.

Because participating in grades gives The Man permission to judge you.

And nobody judges me.

Until the 19th, when I audition for Oklahoma!.

Why is he acting like this? He'll never get a part in Oklahoma!.

I guess when we put him back together with his duplicate,

he kept his duplicate's personality and doesn't really care about anything.

Now, now hold on there. I care about a lot of things, man.

Like the hot asphalt of the open road, OK,

suede, all right, tasseled jackets.

Yeah. Well, that's about it.

Oh. No, don't forget the stark beauty of silence.

There. That's it.

OK, if this is what college guys are like, I'm dating a military man.

I kind of like this new Justin.