The Epic Tales of Captain Underpants

This is George Beard and Harold Hutchins,

and I'm Rap Talkwell,

your host here on Chattin' Pants Morning Edition.

And today, we're chattin' about the new season of Captain Underpants!

But first, let's look back at some highlights from season one.

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-Wow, lotta screaming. -Looks fun.

And as we all remember, season one ended up with you guys being expelled,

Mr. Krupp being fired

and grown-up cyborg Melvin traveling back in time from the future

and taking over the school.

What is going on here? I didn't authorize a talk show!

And who is this guy?

Hey, it's Mr. Krupp, everyone's favorite principal to hate!

-Boo! More boo! - Boo!

And where is that crowd noise coming from?

The My-Hammy-Sound Machine!

Boo!

You're trespassing! I'm gonna have you all arrested!

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Tra-la-la!

Captain Underpants!

-Hey, you're that guy with the mouth. -I am!

So, Cap, how about a spoiler from the first episode of the new season?

Okay. I'm not in it.

-What? -Yeah.

But the show's called Captain Underpants.

Yeah, someone's getting fired, for sure. Hit play!

The Tenuous Takedown of the Tyrannical Teachertrons!

Chapter one: Melv-Interruption.

While this may look like Jerome Horwitz Elementary,

it is now Melvin Sneedly Elementary, with Snooty Latin Motto Coming Soon.

FYI, I never liked you, Miss Anthrope.

Eliteanati Academy rejected my appeal!

They even returned the gift basket of inert gases I sent!

What part of "Send muffins" was unclear?

-I'm doomed! -No matter.

Once we've turned this school

into a world-class institution of learning,

Eliteanati will be begging for you, its star student, to attend.

You're right. And the best part is,

no annoyingly vexatious George and Harold to interfere.

Hello, Melvins!

What are you doing here?

-I expelled you when I took over! -Yeah, we were there.

But we couldn't tell our parents. They'd kill us!

So we pretended to go to school

but then did a bunch of really cool things instead.

- We climbed Mt. Everest. - Visited the Eiffel Tower.

We even went to the moon!

-You're lying! -Yeah, you're right.

When the new school Superintendent, Grace Wain,

found out about the whole rulebook thing, she said...

"Mr. Krupp's handwritten rules aren't official rules

so the expulsion of George Beard and Harold Hutchins is repealed"?

-Agh! Foiled by bureaucracy! -How did you not see that coming?

There are a lot of moving parts to this plan! I can't think of everything.

But she can't stop me from Melvinizing the school.

We'll make this place the smartest, most superior elementary school anywhere!

- -Because that's what we're doing!

So to impress Eliteanati Academy,

the Melvins made classes much harder. Even for the teachers.

Uh, hmm...

Today we'll be studying, um... "Puh-hy-six?" What's that?

Physics, you incurious meat sack!

Hey!

We're learning Melviny stuff?

Krupp was bad, but at least when he was here we didn't have to learn.

-We're doomed. -That you are, you unripe bananas.

Hey.

Here goes.

Uh...

-I like Puh-hy-six! -This is my new favorite class!

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This is gym? They got rid of gym class? That was the easiest class we have!

P.E. is a waste of time.

So instead of hurling projectiles, we'll learn computer science!

On.

On. On.

On, you stupid yeah-yeah-yeah machine. On!

It's not plugged in.

You leave me no yeah-yeah-yeah choice! On!

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-Turn on! -No. This is my new favorite class!

Ugh!

And now we add the, um, magnesium to the acid?

Not magnesium. Chromium, you doorknob with legs!

Hey!

You created a dimensional vortex!

-Whoa! -Okay, this is definitely

-my new favorite class. -

-Ugh... What's this stuff? -Synthesized bio-matter nutrient bricks.

Yeah, sounds delicious. Oh, almost forgot.

We love what you and future you are doing with the school,

-so we got you a little gift. -It's muffins.

You're not supposed to be enjoying this. I am! Humph!

Humph!

- -Ugh! Tastes like a driveway.

I don't know. It's kinda growing on me.

Ooh, what?

Minus the food bricks, this Melvinized school is awesome.

Yeah, it's a shame Melvin didn't come from the future

and replace Mr. Krupp years ago.

Mr. Krupp. Wonder what he's up to.

Welcome to All Work Warehouse. Can I help you find something?

Like your pants?

I'm looking for a principal's desk.

-Is that even a thing? -Are you even a thing?

Carl, bogey, ten o'clock.

These so-called teachers know even less than the students!

How will I get into Eliteanati like this?

You won't. That's why I'm replacing the teachers.

Oh, muffin basket? Is there a blueberry in there?

Replacing them? With who?

Chapter two: See You Later, Educator.

Uh, hmm...

No way she doesn't get hit by that basketball again.

-Seen it. Let's make a comic. -I wouldn't do that if I were you.

Well, you're not. You're Melvin. I'm George and this is Harold.

Hi, how's it going?

-And why are you so happy? -You'll see.

Greetings, raw human material. I am your new instructor.

-You are obsolete. -What's that? Whoop!

-Whoa. What is that? - Attention!

I have replaced your regular carbon-based teachers

with state-of-the-art Teachertron 2000.

For all of you non-Melvins, good luck.

Commencing robotics lesson. Chapter one.

Zeroth's law states that if two thermodynamic systems...

-Yes. Yes. -are in equilibrium...

You know what he's talking about?

Not a clue. Comic time.

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Unauthorized creativity.

-Whoa. What? -Disruption Disrupters. So good.

"So good?" That's my thing.

Not anymore.

So good! So good! So good!

So robots are taking over our yeah-yeah-yeah jobs?

-Taking us away from the children? -Affirmative.

Hooray!

Remain here until further notice.

Wait, what if we have to go to the yeah-yeah-yeah bathroom?

What is a bathroom?

You know, it's where you-- Nah, I guess you don't. Run for it!

-Stop, gym instructor. -Let him go. It is a plot point.

-What? -

-Whoa. This is bad. -Really bad!

-Teachertrons mean no more fun! -Those classes will be super hard.

We get less than a C this year, we can't go to summer camp.

Summer camp! Swimming, s'mores, going outdoors!

Summer camp!

We gotta get rid of them.

Hey, remember how we pranked Mr. Fyde so hard

he literally went crazy, and now he's a tree?

Actually, they accidentally turned Mr. Fyde

into a giant angry walking avocado pit

who fell into a hole and grew into an avocado tree, but...

-But he's a happy tree. -True.

So we just do that to the Teachertrons.

-But times a million. -Yes!

- - One of our best pranks!

I know! We're Robot Cop. Even robots aren't above the law.

-They're going down! -

When detecting unusual nanowave signature in the graviton charge limiter,

reignite the electron reaction transmitter--

Robo-hands up, robo-criminal! You're under robo-arrest!

We'll go sit down now.

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-So what do we do now? -Plan B, start some trouble.

Synthesized bio-matter nutrient bricks fight!

Food fight!

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-Uh... Do we have a plan C? -Buddy, we got the whole alphabet.

Those robots just shrugged off our prank storm like they didn't care.

It's like they're robots.

We'll never beat them without Captain Underpants.

-Yeah. -Yeah.

I can't believe I'm saying this...

But we gotta get Krupp back.

Chapter three: Home Is Where The Krupp Isn't.

You think Krupp's here?

Well, he's not at school, so it's the only other place he could be.

Probably didn't hear you.