Island in Between (金門)

Growing up in Taiwan, I heard a lot about Kinmen.

Like most Taiwanese,

I had never been to these islands so close to China.

Until I came with my parents a couple years ago.

I knew that Kinmen had been the frontline for Taiwan

during the Chinese Civil War,

but it was still a shock to see that China

is literally right there.

I sang this song all the time as a kid.

We were taught that we, Taiwanese, were Chinese in exile

and one day with help from the US,

we would retake China, freeing the mainland

from the evil Communists.

And Kinmen would be the launching pad.

About 100 miles across open water from Taiwan,

Kinmen is surrounded on three sides by the mainland

and has frequently been shelled by red artillery.

Kinmen is in effect the cork

in the Communist invasion bottle

performing much the same role for Asia,

as does Berlin in Europe.

This was my dad in 1968.

When he drew Kinmen for his mandatory military service,

my grandmother cried.

She was afraid that he might not make it back alive.

As I got older, politicians on TV

stopped trying to convince us

to take back China at all costs.

But the folks in Kinmen were still expected to defend Taiwan,

even though they have family and history

just on the other side of the divide.

As for my family, like most ethnic Chinese in Taiwan,

we've been here for generations

and have no connections to China.

Instead, my father dreamt of going to the US,

which is where I have spent most of my adult life

until I moved back to Taipei a few years ago.

After so many years away,

I'm still figuring out my own relationship

to Taiwan and China.

Kinmen connects Taiwan to China,

but also keeps them apart.

Maybe that's why I'm drawn to this place.

I want to make sense of it.

Growing up, this channel of water

was the edge of our universe, separating good from evil.

Then one day, we were suddenly allowed

to cross to the other side.

And all it took was a half hour ferry ride.

On my very first trip to China,

I used my Taiwanese Compatriot Permit.