Jumpin' at the Bedside (Hopla på sengekanten)

JUMPIN' AT THE BEDSIDE -

Aksel, you are completely immoral. It's immoral to smoke in bed.

Can't you help it?

Will you marry me?

- I'm serious! - Sorry. It was so unexpected.

- It's not like you. - What do you mean?

Don't misunderstand me, I like you... and you're so honest.

We've been doing business for years.

Suddenly, I just felt hungry for you ...

... so I let myself be seduced.

- Sorry you had to wait, Tilly. - That's alright, I had some work to do.

Here are the receipts from Danafox for the last two months.

- That's great. Thank you! - Goodbye, then. Sir...

- So much... ? - You've been quite an asset to the company.

If people saw us, they might think that you were paying me.

No one has seen us. Cheers!

Our new brochure. I hope your new employer will also need our services.

Yes, my new boss will certainly need your escort girls.

It's a global engineering firm specializing in water treatment plants, ...

... our company has maintained its roots in our founder's high standards for quality.

How much do we build yourselves, Director?

We don't use the title, "Director". Here, all the employees use each other's names.

We only manufacture the specialized filters. They are kept secret from our competitors.

In addition, we do engineering design and contracting.

Engineer Poulsen has been with us since the time of the original inventor.

This is our new sales promotion manager, Aksel Hansen.

- What's that in Danish? - Sales Director.

Hmph... a paid tourist.

Engineer Poulsen's son just started here as an apprentice. Where is he?

On the toilet.

The laboratory is down there.

There's too much bacteria in the waste from Kumpula.

Take it to Poulsen's section.

- This is the sales curve. - It looks a bit impotent.

Thygesen, our previous sales director, lost a big contract in Japan.

- So that's why... - Yes, we insist on results here!

Here's a 4-Stage plant in Africa. We'll hear about another in the United States next week.

It's a plant for a large municipality. Our main competitor, Dekantervand AB, ...

... is also bidding on it. You need to deal with it right away.

Take a look at it, and see what you think.

It seems we just need to win over the City Council and their engineers?

Yes, those would be the key contacts.

We'll invite them here for some good food and a little feminine companionship.

Good food is never a bad idea, ... but what's this about females?

- There are no female engineers! - No... I meant women to entertain them.

Women?

- Engineer Poulsen is coming. - I'm busy!

- He's coming in anyway. - Oh, no!

If this Kumpula report is correct, the entire population will have diarrhea!

- Can't you see I'm in a meeting? - Either we change the PH value at the plant...

- ... or I'll have to invent something new. - Do it, then!

- Your wife is on the phone. - Oh, no!

- Yes, it's me, May. - Will you be home on time?

- I was planning on fixing a special dinner. - I might be a little late.

- Oh no, that's the third time this week. - Don't you have cooking class tonight?

- No, that's on Tuesdays. - Oh, I forgot.

Does he have a good looking wife?

No idea. I've never seen her. He doesn't mix his work and personal life.

I'd better go down and invent a new purification filter.

I'll be home as soon as I finish my meeting with our new sales director.

- I wish I could get a job, too. - My sweet little wife shouldn't work, ...

Alright, I'll turn down the oven until you get here...

- Yes, good. - See you later.

- I'd call that... prostitution! - No, they're just attractive women!

This is the brochure from SubRosa.

Delicious, eh?

You'd have me sit on the edge of the bed selling water treatment plants ...

... to a mayor lying there with a ... whore?

The customer is easier to negotiate with after a pleasant dinner and a good screw.

No way!

- It was in the oven too long. - It's delicious, darling. Delicious!

- No thanks. Help yourself. - It's the perfect temperature, 18 degrees.

I'd rather have some water. Cold, clear water.

- Thanks for the nice dinner. - Won't you have some more? The sauce is good.

It was delicious, but I've had plenty.

It's been a horrible day.

- My poor little darling... - The new sales manager thinks ...

- ... we should do everything for our customers. - Within reason, of course.

But he's going beyond my limits. He wants to provide women for the customers!

- Women? - Yes, women!

He knows a company that rents out women!

They show customers around town, and then they go... they do...

You know what I mean. It's terrible! Clearly an act of procuring.

He says they're attractive women who are simply... ... are simply employees of the company.

Attractive married women. No, my company will not do that!

- Why don't we have a good time tonight? - Of course. I'm ready for bed... right now.

I'll go and get ready.

- So, what did you do today? - Washed, dusted and vacuumed...

You're so sweet...!

- Are you coming? - Oh, you're ready?

Aren't you going to give your little wife a goodnight kiss?

Would you mind turning the light off?

The lady will call, so you can agree on the time and place.

Yes, we'll send Bicky. She has large breasts, ask you requested.

Tilly, check this gentleman out. If everything's okay, we'll send Bicky.

- Then you would be May? Welcome. - Thank you. Am I attractive enough?

Yes! You're exactly our kind of girl. Can you speak English, German, or French?

I spoke all three, but I've been housekeeping for a year. I'm tired of washing and ironing.

- This sounded exciting. What would I be doing? - Showing men the town, going to the theater, ...

... dancing, dining ... and helping them with gifts for their wives.

For a three hour escort, they pay you 500 kronor, and you give us 150.

- Nothing else? - If the customer wants something more, ...

... that's your business. But you can't do it for less than 500 kronor.

- You need a working name... Eva? - That's appropriate. My husband's name is Adam.

- Are you married? - Do you mind?

- No. When can you work? - Between nine and five.

- My husband eats at six o'clock. - You have no free evenings?

I take a cooking class on Tuesdays. I can skip that.

Does your husband know that you're looking for work?

- No! He doesn't want me working. - Okay...

- Hair: blond. Eyes: blue. Height? - 1.67

- 1.67. Any special characteristics? - I stutter a little.

- It doesn't sound like it. - Well, when I become sexually aroused ...

... I talk like this.

That's charming! Excuse me...

Hello? Yes? Good day...

Yes... one moment. Would you mind going topless at the beach?

- No... - Yes, we can arrange that.

- They're all jealous when I'm with you. - Why is that?

- Because you're beautiful! - Thank you very much.

Can we run a little? It's good for the physique.

- Look! Would you like an ice cream? - Yes, thanks!

- No thanks. It's not good for my physique. - You couldn't have just one?

- To get in top shape, it's all or nothing! - Is there anything else you want?

- There is something... it's a little embarrassing. - It's about time!

The boys at the gym kid me because I don't know any girls.

- May I be blunt? - Of course... what?

I'd like to be photographed with you.

- Just photographed? That's all? - Yes... if you don't mind.

- You never do anything with girls? - Sexual intercourse doesn't help my physique.

- Is this Eva? I mean, May? - Yes...

- Is this a bad time? - No...

You only need to say yes or no. I have a businessman for you.

- Could you meet him at 1:30 at the Hotel Liberty? - Yes...

Okay. Just be prepared for anything. Is that okay?

- I'm sorry I'm late. - We have a lot to do.

- Who was that? - It was... Inge.

- That was quick. You usually talk longer. - We're meeting for lunch at 1:30 tomorrow.

It will do you good. You need some variety.

- "As far as what can be believed ... - Did you say panties?

- Where were we? - "Panties"

"Panties"? No, I didn't say that.

"... in this climate of distrust, you can completely ignore the insinuations ...

"... made by the shipping company.

"Our firm is not implicated in this matter. Keep us informed as to the negotiations. Sincerely... "

Nothing more? Is there anything more you want me to do?

- You can type the transcription on this. - And nothing else?

- What do you mean? - Nothing.

I think I've spent enough for twelve letters!

- All I did was type letters. - Didn't you get paid?

- Here's your share, but money isn't everything. - And the man on the beach?

He just wanted to take photos.

- He seemed quite satisfied. - I'd like to do a little something... extra.

It's hard when you can only work one night a week.

I can say that I'm taking another class... weaving or something.

Yes, something on Thursdays! Don't we have the two Italians on Thursday, Tilly?

- Here.. - Thanks!

Bicky will go with you. Let her do the talking.

- Hi, are you Eva? - Yes...

We'll eat and then go to Tivoli. We're supposed to go to room 1172.

Pretty girls, feel welcome in our home.

Pretty girls, my dear friend and I love you.

When it comes to love, we live to love and love to live!

Come in!

So, pretty Danish girls, how are you? Good? Good? Yes, very good!

- What are your names? - I'm Bicky. This is my friend, Eva.

My name is Alfredo. This is my friend, Marco. Come here, Marco!

Thank you, dear.

- Thank you! - Please...

- So, a toast to our pretty Danish girls! - He's offering a toast to the pretty Danish girls.

- Cheers to the men from Italy! - Cheers!

Cheers, pretty girl...

Now, off to Tivoli, for the Little Mermaid! It should be interesting!

He thinks the Little Mermaid is in Tivoli!

First things first: The money! A thousand kronor for both of us.

Here's the problem. The Italian Post Office isn't open.

Therefore, Marco's father will send a telegram.

The money is guaranteed to be here tomorrow. It was supposed to be here this afternoon. I'm sorry.

There isn't any money. They're trying to con us!

"Con"? Marco, do you know what "con" means?

They look like nice guys. I think they're telling the truth.

No, they're trying to con us.

- Without the money, you can forget Tivoli. - We'll have it for sure tomorrow, okay?

- And we'll have nothing to console us tomorrow. - Why don't you give us a chance?

Pretty girls ...

Oh sure... Then crap on you!

You understand? That's it!

- We could have had a nice time with them. - Nice time? Without money, nothing doing!

I'm calling Maria to tell her she needs to be more careful next time.

- How much? What do you charge? - 500 kronor.

- Your room? - I'm not staying here. Come with me...

- Where did you go? - A guy wanted to... in the ladies' room.

- The ladies' room? Did he pay? - Yes... 500.

- It's gone! - The pig took it back!

- He'll get his! - It doesn't matter. It was delightful.

Delightful? Be more careful next time. Come on, let's see if we can find him.

A man! A man!

He stole 500 kronor from my friend!

The little skunk!

- You seem happy? Did you have a good time? - It was delightful.