Young & Hungry

So we're agreed?

Totally agreed.

- You and I can never have sex again. - Right.

Starting when?

Now!

I mean, yeah, the sex was, like, the best I've ever had,

but doing it again will lead to doing it again,

which will lead to one or both of us having feelings,

which will lead to a relationship, which will

lead to us breaking up, which will lead to you not being able to focus

on work which means you won't be making any new apps

which will lead to the economy tanking,

causing the world to completely fall apart!

- Best you've ever had, huh? - Josh!

Look, I get it.

You and I in a relationship don't work.

We've tried... and failed.

Exactly, so you have to get out of here now.

Okay? If Sofia walks in and she sees this, she's gonna kill me.

- Because we broke a lamp? - We broke a lamp?

- Up top. - No.

No, no, no. You don't understand, okay?

Sofia has spent so many hours

and texts and tequila shots counseling me about you,

and she can't find out about this!

Relax. She won't find out from me.

She will if she comes in here and you're all nakedy!

Oh, my God, she's here! Uh... go out the window, go out the window!

Go out... No! Go out the window!

What are you doing?

Naked cleaning.

I should take a picture.

Why? 'Cause I look so sexy?

- No, 'cause you're cleaning. - Oh.

- Oh, my God! Spider! - Where?

Turn around! It's over there!

I got it!

Spider guts.

Okay, well, you just have fun cleaning.

I'm gonna try to get some sleep before my boss calls me.

Ugh. Dammit!

Hi, Logan.

No, of course I'm not in bed.

Here, take this. Go.

This is your shirt.

Yeah, it's San Francisco. No one will notice.

So, ah, our first day after the sex

went pretty well, wouldn't you say?

- Haven't thought about it once. - Me either.

- You lying? Yep. - Yep. You?

But the important thing is it's the weekend. I don't have to see you

'cause I will be here and you will be at your apartment.

Get this. We are kicked out of our apartment for the weekend.

- No! - What?

Our building has termites.

Sucks for you guys!

Wait a minute, that's my building too!

Yeah. Our building is getting tented tomorrow

and the landlord is putting us up at a hotel.

The Pacific Resort.

More like The Last Resort!

That place got fake crab in the buffet

and real crabs in the bed!

Wait, how would you know?

Remember when I had that affair with the senator?

Yeah, well, you guys, we don't have a choice.

We have nowhere else to stay.

Josh!

You got a lot of extra rooms here.

That I do, that I do!

In fact, you've got rooms I've never even been in!

But I've cleaned somehow!

The point is, how about giving us some of those rooms?

No!

I just feel like that hotel sounds like so much fun!

Yeah! It's an exciting adventure!

An adventure that ends with a trip to the free clinic!

Josh, is there some reason you don't want us to stay here?

Pfft. No, no, no.

I mean, look, I don't know what the big deal is.

I think you guys are blowing this way out of proportion.

There is absolutely no reason whatsoever why you can't sleep with me.

- All of you. - Huh?

In my home.

Well... well, great. It's settled then.

Gabi, is it gonna be a problem for you to sleep at Josh's?

No, no, no.

Why... why would it be?

Well, because you finally got to a good place with him

and I don't want the situation turning into a big, dramatic nightmare.

Sofia, it's gonna be fine.

I meant for me.

Look, there's gonna be no drama for anybody.

Definitely not from me. I'm happy to help.

Hey... what if I bought everybody houses?

Oh, God. I'm coming, sweetie!

She's gone!

I'm gonna kill myself with this unicorn!

Elliot, I know you're hurt,

but we knew this could happen with a foster child.

You should be happy. Keisha's with her family now.

What does some third cousin have that we don't?

Legal rights and a ranch in Victorville.

Keisha will be fine.

It's you I'm worried about.

Please don't say her name.

It makes my head pound and my heart ache.

From now on, let's just refer to her as...

Pineapple.

Okay, okay.

Why Pineapple?

'Cause I love...

pineapple!

All right, that's it.

We gotta get out of here.

We're spending the next few days in a luxury hotel

with a jacuzzi tub and a beautiful view of the city.

You're right!

Why spend the money when Josh has a beautiful view?

But wait, the girls are already there. He doesn't need us there too.

You're right!

We'll let him know you're in tears and devastated.

We'll guilt him into it.

How did the Jewish guy not come up with that?

Oh, my God, I can't believe I get to sleep in a house

where the oven and the heater are two separate things.

I can't wait to sleep on one of Josh's king size beds!

Don't you need a King Kong size bed?

See, Elliot?

You sound like your old self again!

Okay, I made breakfast for everybody.

Waffles with bananas, strawberries, and pineapple.

Pineapple!

Hey!

Look at us.

Me making breakfast,

you making... clickety-clack on your laptop.

Yeah, we can... we can definitely do this for a few days.

Absolutely.

Oh, shoot.

You need to leave.

Ow!

- Oh! - Ow!

Here, let me help you.

You're rich. Buy new pants.

- Hi. - Hi.

I, uh, couldn't sleep.

Yeah, me neither. But not because anything is on my mind.

Yeah. Me neither.

Hey, ah, you know what helps? Hot cocoa.

- I'll get the marshmallows. - Okay.

Gah!

Why is there duct tape on the fridge?

Oh, Yolanda sleepwalk eats, so she taped it closed.

What?

She eats in her sleep, so she taped it...

It's a whole thing.

- So this is nice. - So nice.

You know, in the old days,

this would have been awkward, but now that we're just friends...

- Great friends. - Amazing friends.

In fact, we should watch Friends.

- Hey, to great friends. - Amazing friends.

Oh, my God, we did it again.

Yeah, we did.

Yeah, but we said we'd never do it again.

But we did.

- What was that? - I don't know.

Yolanda, it's not what it looks like.

It didn't look like anything until you just said,

"It's not what it looks like."

Yolanda?

Is she sleeping?

Oh, my God, she's sleepwalk eating!

- That's really a thing? - Yes!

Oh, my God, this is great!

Now she won't even remember this!

Here you go.

There ya go.

I don't know. Okay, we gotta get out of here before anybody catches us.

Yes, Logan, hi.

No, of course I'm up.

Who isn't up at 4:00 in the morning?

Oh, of course I remembered your ice-cold kombucha.

What is kombucha?

Please have kombucha!

Yes! Kombucha!

Okay.

This is your dream job.

This is my stepping stone.

And one day, I'm gonna wake assistants up at 4:00 in the morning

and ask them to hand-deliver dirt-colored drinks made of...

yeast and bacteria. Ugh.

We gotta stop meeting like this.

This is not funny, okay?

Do you understand how close we came to getting...

Why isn't Elliot sleeping with Alan?

Daddy loves you so much, sweet Pineapple!

Thank God he's out.

Oh, my God, I can't believe we almost got caught again.