Mr. Plankton (Mr. 플랑크톤)

I'm going to die now.

Fuck.

Fucking hell.

Every night,

I imagined what it'd be like to die.

Would it feel exhilarating, like jumping over a high hurdle?

Or would it feel liberating, like throwing off soaking wet clothes?

Or maybe it would be as mundane as walking from one subway car to the next.

You fucking bastard!

No.

Now that I'm facing it, it's nothing like that at all.

I… I want to live.

I'll kill you!

I want to live.

I will kill you!

MR. PLANKTON

What? Another one died?

What's the problem? Why do they keep dying?

This is driving me nuts.

Did your kid run away?

Are they a delinquent or simply a runaway?

Sure, finding people is a piece of cake for us.

Two days, tops. Just give us the name and date of birth.

- Long time no see. - Hi.

We just need a three-million-won retainer before we set out.

Hey! You idiot!

Blocking the fucking road!

Sorry?

My boss doesn't do small jobs like this. I'm in charge of this sort of thing.

If you're reluctant, go find someone else.

We're already swamped.

HAE JO ERRAND HOUSE

I'm saying this because now only you two are left.

You guys had better die together at the same time.

Don't leave the other one all alone.

Open the door, Hae Jo. I know you're in there.

Open up!

We should replace this goddamn door.

Oh no, ma'am!

Your shoe! I'll bring it right to you. Here you go, ma'am.

- Open up. - Sure. We must protect your fair skin.

Goddamn it!

He's not here. Probably headed to the sauna for a scrub.

That goddamn weasel. Where did he run off to this time?

He does whatever the hell he wants. He's like the rain. No stopping him.

He comes and goes as he pleases.

Don't you just love the smell of summer?

Hey, you. Lackey.

I'm Yoo Gi-ho, not "Lackey."

Lackey, you'd better tell your boss this.

His pretty face can only save him until the month ends.

- Yes, ma'am. - Get me some ice water.

Damn. It's boiling in here! Hey!

- Switch the fan on first. - The fan! Of course.

It's so hot.

- Fuck. - They'll tear down this building anyway.

Why does he have to be so stubborn and send the union after me?

So annoying.

Freaking annoying.

I bet I'm the only landlady who has to beg her tenants to move out.

You're a real saint in the rental market.

Drink up. Refreshing, right?

He's got no choice. Tell him he should just move in with me.

- Sorry? - He has nowhere else to go.

I'll take him in.

Good thing I just bought a new king-size bed.

What the…? Just look at this.

You'll hurt your back sleeping scrunched up on couches like this.

My God, this is…

Yes, they're moving out. By the end of the month, yes.

What? What the fuck?

If you guys show up here with an excavator without my permission, you're dead.

I almost got crushed to death.

My foot's gone numb.

I told you we needed to look for a new office,

or you really will end up in that woman's bed.

Wouldn't be the first time.

Actually, I've been meaning to ask. What's going on between you two?

- She's my mom. - Mom?

A sister at times.

Fuck. Goddamn it!

- A friend, a lover. - Disgusting!

Pick up your dog's poop! You don't deserve to have a pet.

Financier, pimp, boss, landlady.

Whatever.

How can we move out when we have no place to go?

You think that's why I hold out?

There's nowhere I want to go.

So I'm just staying put.

Whatever. Let's just get to work.

All right. Let's see what kinds of wackos need our services today.

STAND-IN FOR SON NEEDED

This man wants us to visit his dying mother

and stay by her deathbed.

- She doesn't recognize him anyway. - Boring. Next.

That druggie from Sadang-dong wants 200 zolpidem pills.

He's had his fun. Time to drop dead.

- Next. - Next.

"My boss is on a work trip. Kill him…"

We're not hitmen, you fucker. Next.

This guy's asking us to take care of some bullies at his son's school.

That sounds fun.

First,

we'll protect him in person for two weeks

while hacking the bullies' phones to gather evidence.

Then press the authorities.

Seven-million retainer fee, plus bonus.

Seven million won for the Uncle Package. That's inflation for you, man.

It's that damn girl again.

What is it?

She wants us to find her runaway brother.

This brat posted all over the board. How am I supposed to delete all these?

A little girl?

A fourth grader. How old could she be? Ten or eleven?

Eleven.

You didn't put up a notice? "No teen missing-person or runaway cases."

Shit.

- "Shit"? - Yes.

Why do everything but that?

Finding a missing family member is easy, rewarding and good money.

It's a gold mine. You're ruining our business.

Just toe the line.

How about I stick my toe up your ass?

- My ass? - Yes.

And I wanna see your ID.

You're younger than me, aren't you? Let me see it.

Would you prefer to work your ass off for a younger boss?

Then you can be my elder.

My big bro, Kkari.

You want to know why I don't take missing person cases? It's simple.

If a parent loses their child, it is their job to find them.

And if a kid runs away from home, we should respect their decision.

In other words, we have no reason to get involved.

Do you get it now?

Answer me, Kkari.

Yes, understood, boss.

Then hurry up and put up the notice. And get some food too, fuckwit.

"We don't take on missing person cases, you fucking morons!"

We have arrived.

H O AND HO

What does that say?

"Ho and Ho"?

5,000,000 WON DEPOSITED

Hell, yes!

You can stick to your stupid rules,

but this honeybee will suck all the honey out of this sweet gig.

Man, this is sweet. Hell, yeah!

What the hell?

It's clogged again?

What the fuck!

NO CALLER ID

NO CALLER ID

NO CALLER ID

NO CALLER ID

IGNORE ME AND I'LL KILL YOU

Fuck.

Oh, dear.

So, why did you ignore my calls?

I was so close to killing you.

I like that gaze.

Oh, jeez.

You look better with them on.

That was funny.

Funny? This is getting boring for me.

Hurting me, breaking things,

and threatening to kill me if I don't do as I'm told.

Think it would work?

I was told you'd do anything except murder.

That's why they call you Hae Jo,

as in "fixer."

Hae Jo. Hae Joo?

I don't like how it sounds.

I don't take on just any job.

Then what?

Only the jobs I want to do.

Well,

I didn't come here expecting a cliché threat like that to work anyway.

I wanted to make a strong impression, so I went a bit overboard.

Sometimes, clichés do work.

A classic never gets old.

Whatever.

Kidnap me.

Kidnap me at my wedding.

- And the theme? - I told you.

I like clichés and classics.

Sounds fun.

This isn't about fun. You could get yourself killed.

I looked into that nutcase.

If you do take on this job,

you'll be lucky to walk away in one piece.

So what?

- Your head would be-- - Hey!

Fun, my ass! Fun doesn't pay the bills!

Your ass? No, blame her ass.

Ms. Jo Jae-mi?

How's the size?

Perfect. Not too tight.

I've never seen a family ring that's over 500 years old.

It's just right for the head family of a clan.

Lucky you.