Boston Legal

Excuse me. Uh, where is walter schmidt's room, please?

Shirley. oh.

What happened?

He's okay. He broke a few ribs.

He's resting right now. What happened?

He took a turn this week.

He doesn't recognize any of us at the nursing home anymore.

He's been getting agitated, always seems to be terrified.

How did he get hurt?

He, uh, jued out of his bedroom window.

A hedge broke his fall and probably saved his life.

He jumped out the window?

His dementia. I've gotta get back there.

He's not doing so well.

I'll join you.

Oh, thanks. I'll be fine.

Well, m-maybe he'll recognize me.

I- I always had a great relationship with your father.

We'd hunt, we'd fish.

Remember the time I shot him in the calf?

Oh, you're lucky he doesn't rember.

I'd really rather go alone. I'd like to see him.

I was always very fond of your father. Really?

And he always liked me.

Yes, he did. Okay then, let's go.

Jerry, what's wrong?

I'm in trouble. What sort of trouble?

Oh, I can't tell you. Why can't you tell me?

You're a girl! It's man trouble? Did you get a woman pregnant?

Dear god.

It isn't that.

Well, stop whinging and just tell me.

Well... During the strike, I fell in love.

What strike? It doesn't matter.

The point is, I met somebody wonderful.

Fab. And?

And she's suing me for sexual assault.

Sexual assault?

Stop squealing. You sound like a stuck pig.

What happened? Did you touch her without her consent?

No, I would never!

She's claiming I--

She's saying... I drugged her.

Jerry...

Did you?

Well...

Maybe a little.

I'm hoping to make it to the island

on memorial day,

if I can dig myself out of here.

That'd be great. We've missed you.

Aw. Please. mm.

So... What can I do for you?

Well, take a breath, have a seat, carl.

All right.

'cause this is a biggie.

Mm. Let me have it.

We want to build an atomic bomb.

What are you talking about?

We want to build a weapon of mass destruction

thatwecontrol.

By "we," you mean-- Nantucket.

I'm here officially as head of the board of selectmen,

and liz is here as mayor.

We're a very small island, totally exposed.

The homeowners

are becoming increasingly concerned about security,

and well... We're rich, we can afford it, we want one.

An atomic bomb...

On nantucket?

We've been denied approval to purchase plutonium

by the nuclear regulatory commission.

Don't you hate that?

We'd like to sue.

What kind of drugs are we taking on the island these days?

Carl, I know it sounds crazy. You think?

But if something ever happens,

which the government says is inevitable, by the way,

who's going to come rushing to protect us, the vineyard?

No, no. We need to look out for ourselves.

And fortunately, we have the weal

and the means to do so.

You'd like...

An atomic bomb.

As soon as possible.

Oxytocin? It's a hormone, not a drug.

What does it do?

Well, essentially, it causes people...

To trust you.

There's a hormone that causes people to trust you?

I mainly used it for me.

It can also help people with social anxiies.

It enabled me to trust her as well.

I'd... Spray it on like cologne.

It has a nice, gentle fragrance, not too bold.

Anyway...

Dana... That's her name...

She found out, and she's suing me.

You're disappointed in me.

Well, I am, jerry, truth be told.

dad?

Hey, dad.

Who are you?

Dad, it's-- it's me. It's-- it's shirley.

You remember denny?

Denny came to say hi.

Hi, walt.

How are those, uh, ribs healing?

Lookin' good, walt.

He doesn't like to be touched.

Where's the attending?

I'll call for him.

A nuclear bomb on nantucket?

Are they insane? Poor people are insane, whitney.

Rich people are colorful.

Yes, well, assuming the colorful people are sincere,

how can you be about to actually take the case?

Well, first, their security concerns are legitimate.

Second, nuclear bombs are becoming more and more viable,

easier to build.

The world landscape one day will be dotted with them.

Why not nantucket? And third-- most importantly--

When an island full of millionaires

asks us to represent them,

lorraine, we do not refer them to another firm.

I need you three

to arm me with research and legal analysis

as to why nantucket shouldhave a bomb.

Hello. I'm Dr. Bromfield.

Shirley schmidt.

Nice to meet you,

though not under these circumstances.

Uh, this is denny crane.

Hello. hey.

I wish I could tell you something positive.

I'm afraid the best we can do is try and keep him calm.

I don't dare move him.

I'm concerned that he'll reinjure his ribs.

I would like to hook him up to a morphine drip, please.

His injuries are causing him considerable pain.

I'd like this done as soon as possible.

I, um...

He-- he seems to be comfortable now.

He's not. I know him better than you.

I'd like the drip, please.

Ms. Schmidt...

I can't do what you're asking me to do.

I'm asking you to manage his pain, doctor.

I'm very sorry.

I don't think a morphine drip is indicated here.

Ned thiel...

Is he still chief of staff here?

He is. Get him.

Look...

I know what you're asking for, and I sympathize.

My own father died of alzheimer's--

You know this, denny-- But we have laws.

This goes on all the time. You know that.

Well, it happens sometimes with, as I said,

patients in severe physical pain.

But look at him.

How do we couch this as pain management?

You simply believe me when I tell you that he is hurting.

Come on, ned.

We're not asking for anything

that doesn't happen in every hospital every day.

I can't.

But if you get a court order forcing our hand,

I suppose we'll have no choice but to abide.

I'll argue it myself. Let's go.

Thank you, doctor.

Uh... Denny?

i...

I- I think I would like alan to argue this.

It's-- it's going to be tough,

getting the judge off this dime,

and... I think this is sort of alan's wheelhouse.

Okay.

I guess that makes sense.

Let's go get alan.

an atomic bomb... In nantucket?

Are you kidding me? No, I'm not, your honor.

Nor is our president kidding when he constantly tells us

to be afraid.

Nantucket is riddled with republicans, by the way.

They believe our commander in chief

when he cries wolf.

They believe john mccain as he cries double wolf.

Some even believe cheney when he says

the bomb's already been fired at us, it's just on a timer. The court dismisses--

Your honor, as ridiculous as this may seem on its face,

let's consider, your honor,

nantucket is all by itself out there.

It wouldn't be a high priority to defend

should this country be under attack.

Shouldn't they be allowed to defend themselves?

I would ask you at least listen to my client

before quashing our request.

I'll give your client 15 minutes.

3:00.