Yummy Mummy

So, Lilith, how are you feeling?

You know, within yourself?

Emotionally?

Well, physically, I feel horrendous.

I'm supposed to be radiant, not this slug.

But emotionally?

I guess fine.

Sorry, I just can't stop crying.

My brilliant husband has decided that

now is the perfect time to get an extension on the house,

so we've had to move in with his mother.

His mother, she is...

Very tactile.

In fact, everyone just keeps touching me.

Well, it's not me, it's...

it's the bump they want.

No one is interested in me at all anymore.

Just the bump.

They open doors for the bump, they carry bags for the bump.

No one sees me.

I know my body doesn't belong to me anymore,

but how much of the rest of me is part of that package?

I feel like I've been taken over.

Not, no, not...

Not by this person.

I love this person, I cannot wait to meet this person.

I just...

I just feel, kind of...

invisible.

Sorry, motion-sensitive lights.

So you're feeling fine, then?

Within yourself?

Orange juice is very high in fructose, isn't it peanut?

- I've ironed your boxers Ry-Ry, they're on the landing. - Thanks, Mum!

Did you ask the builders how much longer for the floor, babe?

Pew!

I haven't asked them for a quote yet, peanut.

Did the midwife mention your sugar intake?

What?

Your heart rate.

Come on!

You need to keep an eye on your glucose levels, remember?

It's not good for the baby, and neither is your temper.

Besides, she loves having us here.

The cot can go here, look.

And Mum can help you when I'm back at work.

Can't you, Mum?

There's no modesty in motherhood, darling.

You must embrace it.

Howl at your inner-moon!

You know, my nipples went that colour when I had you, Ry-ry.

I know that you hate the idea of it.

It really is for the best.

I only get two weeks off once the baby's born.

Hey, stop it.

You look incredible, Mummy.

Don't call me that.

God, I'm so horny, babe. - You feel amazing, Mummy.

Babe? - Shh, she's kicking.

And now I'm late.

Did the midwife mention your sugar intake?

You must embrace it!

I only get two weeks off once the baby's born.

It's not good for the baby. Even with your temper, the heart rate.

I think I'm going to blow off swimming and pregnancy yoga today, babe.

Might go to the cinema. Catch a film.

I need some me time.

Have you taken your vitamins?

Babe, did you hear what I just said?

Ryan?

Have a great day, peanut.