Jupiter Ascending

Technically speaking, I'm an alien.

And from the perspective of immigration, an illegal one.

My parents met at the university in Saint Petersburg where he taught astrophysics

and she taught applied mathematics.

My mother fell in love with him when she found him almost frozen to death

on the bank of the Neva, staring at the stars.

Tonight, the sky is completely full of miracles.

My mother won't talk much about that time.

But my aunt Nino told me about my father.

Max...

His name was Maximilian Jones and he was the son of an English diplomat

who always saw the best in people.

I often wonder if what happened to my mother and father

changed me from someone who might have seen the best in people

to someone who always expects the worst.

How's my Jupiter?

[ We can't name a child after a planet... ]

Not a planet. The planet.

The biggest and most beautiful planet in our solar system.

She is our Jupiter.

Over my dead body we will name her "Jupiter."

Soon you will discover that your mother can be extraordinarily unreasonable at times.

But fortunately for us, she remains susceptible to your father's particular...

charm.

No, oh, no, oh, no! No, not the telescope, please!

Don't take the telescope, please!

Max! Ma...

In her grief, my mother pushed everyone except her sister out of her life.

Somewhere in the middle of the Atlantic,

she pushed me out too.

Pusha. Pusha!

I was born without a country. Without a home.

Without a father.

But I was born in the house of Leo...

with Jupiter rising at twenty-three degrees ascendant.

According to my aunt,

this is supposed to mean that I am destined for great things

and that I will find the one true love of my life.

- Jupiter. - Coming!

- You finish the bathroom yet? - Not yet.

- We still have another house tonight. - I'll be fast.

Problem with astrology?

Total bullshit.

What was the name of this planet?

Zalintyre, I think.

Have you ever seen a harvest?

Oh, no. Never!

But I've heard they feel no pain.

It's all quite humane, from what I've been told.

Well, there are marshals and administrators

to make sure everything's done according to code, but still...

It can be rather... affecting.

Now you sound like Mother.

Most of them were miserable in their lives and what we do for them is a mercy.

Balem, thank you for responding.

We were just admiring this ledger from your latest success.

Well done, brother.

The house of Abrasax continues to thrive,

despite the squandering of your inheritance, brother.

I must say, you're looking a little worse for wear.

Could it be success does not agree with you?

And you look so well.

Could it be that failure agrees with you?

You may have inherited Mother's head for business, but I inherited her heart.

And what does that leave me?

- Her beauty. - Liar.

- Her humor. - Her unluckiness in love?

Her fetish for wrinkles.

Well, if this is to be another of your eulogies, Titus,

I have more important matters to attend.

It was her birthday recently.

You know I get sentimental, and I was going through some of Mother's old sheave-work

and I came across a description of a planet she claimed was the most rare

and beautiful estate she ever owned.

- I believe she named it... - Earth.

...earth. It was part of your inheritance, wasn't it, brother?

I was quite moved by her description and I was wondering

if there was any chance you might be willing to part with it.

Titus, didn't you bother to look at the sheaves?

That planet is worth more than all of your estates combined.

Really?

I had no idea.

- Kalique. - Balem.

Jupiter, get up!

Get up!

Jupiter, make the coffee. Come on.

I hate my life.

[ Come on, girl. We don't have all day. ]

Jupiter, hurry up!

That one goes next to that one.

Jupiter! Get the garbage after this.

- You finish the bathroom? - No.

Jupiter!

I hate my life.

Damn it.

Told you.

Lycantant.

Another Hunter.

And ex-legion. He was a skyjacker.

- How do you know that? - The boots.

There was a Hunter in the legion. A legend.

Could track a single gene in the gyre.

No matter who or what he is... he's after our bounty.

That's him. It's got to be.

We should warn Lord Balem.

That is what we should do, but...

Do you trust me?

This matter must be handled with delicacy, malidictes.

I understand, lady Kalique.

Neither Balem nor Titus must suspect my involvement.

Of course, Your Majesty.

You believe The Hunters can be trusted?

Trust is an illusion, my lady. I believe only in mutual self-interest.

They want another life. We can offer it.

Make the deal.

Welcome back, Lord Balem.

It has been too long.

I have not crossed the vastness of space for your pleasantries, Mr. Night.

Of course, My Lord. We have verified the geneprint.

Most unfortunate news.

I believe Titus is aware of the recurrence.

My spies whisper but cannot substantiate.

So you have her print, but you don't have her?

Mr. Tskalikan.

The keepers traced the print to a medical clinic.

They're eliminating every lead.

We have a name. Dunlevy. Katherine Dunlevy.

Well, I want miss Dunlevy found...

and I want her dead.

Black. Classic? A la mode, a la m... No.

Katherine, I'm done.

Jupiter! Help, please?

- Wow, what's the occasion? - Austin Davis is taking me to dinner.

- I think he's gonna ask me to marry him! - Do you wanna marry him?

Jupiter, he's the number eight richest bachelor under thirty in America.

He speaks fluent Chinese and German,

and he was an alternate on the olympic curling team.

- Solid résumé. - Yeah, I mean, it sounds totally...

- ...Cinderella, doesn't it? - Sure.

Then why do I feel like I'm about to throw up? Oh, God.

I just don't remember Cinderella puking.

Kind of remember her dancing with a bunch of mice.

Have you ever... fallen in love, Jupiter?

You know, my mom says that love is just a fairytale for little girls.

That really, it's all just urges and obligations.

Wow. That's kind of harsh.

- You want my advice? - Yes.

If he's really in love with you,

then he'll understand that you're just overwhelmed and...

and you need a little time.

- That makes sense. - Yeah.

Okay, what do I wear now?

Something that reminds him of what he is waiting for.

Like that Red McQueen, or this Little Ricci.

Katherine? Everything all right?

Yeah, no, no. We're good. I'll be down in a sec.

Picked up a referral. A townhouse. But it has to be Wednesday.

- Wednesday's full. Three houses. - So do four.

English, please. We use English in this house.

Use whatever you like. You sound like Stalin to me.

Stalin?! I'm Stalin? You don't want the money.

I will give it to... Gleb's crew.

Good. Thank you.

- We'll take it. - Big surprise.

Hey, cousin, speaking of money, I was wondering if...

Oh, let me guess. Another advance.

For what this time? Shoes? A new phone?

I'll earn it back.

No, you mean you'll waste it trying to make yourself feel better

by buying something you don't need.

So, what, instead of feeling better, I should save my money and feel worse?

Exactly. Now, you're a smart girl, Jupiter.

I admit it's none of my business,

but that's probably the reason you are not married.

Men do not like smart women.

You keep talking about my daughter like that,

- I will ram that latke so far up your ass, you won't crap for a week. -

English.

Hey! Hey!

You swore, no fighting at dinner.

Jupiter, what is the money for?

No, you're right.

It's nothing I need.

Hey, what was that about? You're not having second thoughts, are you?

What if I am?

Jupiter...

These people, they're counting on you.

Have you even looked at this thing?

Why do they have to use words like "harvesting"? It's just creepy.

Why would you read this? You heard what the doctor said.

It's not a big deal. You go in, cash comes out.

This money, I'm telling you, I have real plans, serious plans.

I believe this money's gonna mean something...

possibly life-changing for both of us.

Okay.

Okay.

- You will not regret this. - All right.

- I promise. I promise! - All right, all right.

All right. Oh, wait, I have a question.

Why is it that you get ten grand and I get five? I mean, they're not your eggs.