Tell Me Lies

Do you think I'm broken inside?

Someday, some guy's gonna get so far under your skin,

he's gonna rot there.

You look really uncomfortable in that dress.

- Who are you? - I'm Stephen DeMarco.

- What's your name? - Ah. I'm Lucy Albright.

Who was that? That's Stephen's girlfriend.

Ex-girlfriend.

I'm not sleeping with anyone else.

Neither am I.

Just shit with Stephen.

I feel like I'm actually going crazy.

An issue has come up

with your short story we workshopped in January.

Can you prove you wrote it?

Stephen, but there's a lot of shit he's not telling me.

You're probably not imagining things.

Hey! I'm Macy. Are you my roommate?

Macy got in an accident last night.

Watch out!

This other car came outta nowhere. I didn't know it was Macy.

Drew was there the night Macy died.

- You cannot tell anyone. - Really wish you didn't tell me this.

It's a flower that you drew for Macy.

This other car came around the corner really fast.

It was Drew.

Nobody knows that you were in that car.

Drew doesn't even know. You should not be here.

- You wrote a letter to the dean about me. - No.

- I swear I didn't-- - Who else knows?

Just you and Stephen and her.

Shit.

Wrigley!

Ah, fuck!

You know that I wouldn't do this.

I'm not gonna trust anything you say. Can you please get out?

Do you think Stephen could've written it?

What? No, of course not.

You're fucking lucky I care enough to keep it to myself.

If you tell people about me, then you're also admitting

that you've been lying to everyone all fucking year!

Have you really not noticed how much I like you?

Did I tell you about my trip with Evan's parents next month?

They seem really sweet.

You're gonna come to the city this summer,

and you're gonna work for my dad's firm.

He's gonna make sure you get into any law school you want.

Why do you still wanna help me?

Because I love you.

What can I do?

Get drunk with me. I just need to shut my brain off.

- You know I'm really happy for you, right? - Yeah, of course, I know that.

I'm never gonna get used to saying the word fiancée.

Hi, Lydia.

And to Evan's parents, Valerie and Paul,

this has been such a beautiful day. Thank you for hosting this.

- You're supposed to wait for the "cheers." - Shit.

And I have to thank my best friends, Pippa and Lucy.

They're the ones who convinced me to pursue Evan in college

after he initially tried to friendzone me.

Yeah!

Yeah, yeah, you can laugh,

but it's true.

No, it's not. Yes, it is!

# Off with your head #

# Dance till you're dead #

# Heads will roll, heads will roll #

# Heads will roll on the floor #

# Glitter on the wet streets #

# Silver over everything #

# The river's all wet #

# You're all chrome #

- It's gotta go. - Yeah, as a wedding gift to me, please.

Okay, fine!

Hey, are you sure you guys don't wanna sleep here tonight?

It's such a long drive.

- No. - No, I don't think so.

Max and I have some stuff in the morning, so...

When are you two moving in together anyways?

Soon. Yeah, soon, for sure. Yeah.

Too bad he had to work today, especially since it's a Saturday.

- And what about you? - What about me?

You're seeing someone. It's obvious.

I am genuinely so single right now.

I think you're lying.

I'm hanging out with this girl, but we're not dating.

It's just sex, and I'm not saying anything more about it.

Guys! We're cutting Stephen's hair!

Evan touches the clippers.

You don't fucking touch the clippers, okay?

Okay. As long as I get to trim your balls.

I'll get the clippers. Such beautiful hair.

- Lemme get just, like, an inch. - I have to pee.

Oh, my God-- Stop, Wrigley!

Oh. Hey.

Hey!

Sorry.

Did you need the bathroom?

No, no, I was just fixing my makeup.

Okay.

Hey, are y-you having fun?

Yeah.

Yeah, everyone's super nice, so...

That's good.

I can't do this.

I've been trying today for Stephen

'cause I know he wants everyone to be cool, and...

I just need you to know...

I will never forgive you.

For any of it.

# Ooh, that's my sh, that's my sh #

# Ooh #

# I heard that you were talking sh #

# And you didn't think that I would hear it #

# People hear you talking like that, getting everybody fired up #

# So I'm ready to attack, gonna lead the pack #

# Gonna get a touchdown, gonna take you out #

# That's right, put your pom-poms down, getting everybody fired up #

# Few times, I been around that track #

# So it's not just gonna happen like that #

# 'Cause I ain't no hollaback girl #

- # I ain't no hollaback girl # - Hi.

If I just, like, chain you to a piece of furniture, will you stay another day?

I wish. My classes start Monday.

No, I'm already having separation anxiety.

I know, I know. I'm gonna miss you so much.

Thank you for taking care of me all summer.

Of course.

Are you nervous about going back?

No.

Well, if that little gremlin even looks in your direction, you call me.

Same goes for his cunt girlfriend.

I'm not even worried about him.

Honestly, I was in some sort of...

delusional state last year.

I mean, he was always bad. I just ignored it, you know?

And Diana did me a favor.

- She did. He's rancid. - Mm-hmm.

Yeah.

Hey, Lydia! Mom said the food's almost here.

Finished packing, Chris?

- Almost. - You have to take care of him at school,

and please make sure he doesn't date anyone lame.

I got you.

And I still can't believe you chose Baird over Colgate.

Well, the girls are hotter at Baird.

They seem so happy.

It's cute. So cute.

The first week or so, there might've been a bit of a learning curve,

but everyone at the firm had positive feedback.

Thanks, Daddy. This has been such a great summer.

- It really has. Thank you. - You did good.

But none of that matters unless you ace the LSAT.

I can get you a million letters of recommendation.

If your LSAT scores aren't good, you might as well not even apply anywhere.

I'll be right back.

Just going to the restroom.

Hey, uh, I-I just gotta tell you

I-I really appreciate

everything you've done for me this summer. It means a lot.

A-And thank you so much for this iPhone.

I-I love it.

Listen, Stephen, you're a smart kid, but I'm not blind.

I saw how you operated over the summer.

You're only honest when it serves you.

And you're a very skilled manipulator,

which is fine in moderation.

But I'm telling you now, if you are not able to control that part of yourself,

it is gonna get you in a lot of trouble.

And I have no interest in my daughter

being anywhere near trouble.

I-I totally understand.

I completely understand.

I really do.

- Sorry about that. - Not at all.

So? Senior year.

Yeah. - Mm? You excited?

Oh, yeah. It's gonna be great.

# A devastating backstroke #

# All the way from France #

# With shiny, shiny cufflinks #

# A shirtsleeve to enhance #

# The pinstriped men of morning #

# Are coming forward to dance #

# With pure Egyptian cotton #

# The kids don't stand a chance #

Hi!

Hi! Come here!

Oh, I missed you.

I missed you more!

I got you a coffee.

You didn't have to do that!

I wanted to!

Oh, my God, I can't believe you got a single!

I know. I'm just so relieved I'm across the hall from you guys again.

I don't know what I would do.

It's gonna be so fun.

My puswas!

# The pinstriped men of morning #

- Oh... my God. - Pippa!