Fuller House

It's the first day of summer vacation!

Hey!

Not really, your brothers are lame.

One, two, three, four.

- Max, wake up. - Wha...

You're having a dream.

Aw. You mean, it's not the first day of summer?

No. It is.

In that case...

Two, three, four.

It's so nice to wake up early

and have a few minutes of calm before the storm.

- Yeah. - Big news!

Hello, storm.

CJ and I have something very important to...

Ooh, pancakes.

Steve and I have set a date.

We are getting married at the end of the summer...

in Japan.

Huh?

Huh?

We're going to Japan because that's where my stepfather lives.

And he's paying for the whole thing.

Ah.

We really want you guys to come.

I mean, I know Japan is a tad inconvenient,

but really it's just a hop, skip and a 6,000-mile jump.

You do know that there's a really nice Benihana right around the corner.

What she's trying to say is, we'll be there.

Great. All right! Oh, honey, we got to get going.

We have to sign up for our gift registries.

Ah, Crate and Barrel, Pottery Barn...

And Applebee's!

I love their potato skins.

You know... honey, we're gonna go to that one first.

Wow.

Steve is really getting married.

And not to you.

Which is fine, if you happen to hate fairy tales and happy endings.

Would you just admit defeat, Team Steve?

All right, she has found her perfect match in dreamy Dr. Matt.

He is pretty dreamy.

In fact, I had a dream about him last night.

Ooh!

We were folding laundry, if you know what I mean.

Tell me more.

What? There's nothing more to tell. We were literally folding laundry.

Hey, Steph-o-Noodle.

Hi.

I just came by to let you know that my RV will be parked at Costco today,

because somebody decided to make the city post those "No Overnight Parking" signs.

Why are you looking at me?

It is an eyesore.

You're always blocking my driveway.

I can never find a place to park. OK, it was me.

Morning, Deej.

I thought we could carpool into work, we don't spend enough time together.

Oh, I know. We have to fix that.

What are you talking about?

You guys work together eight hours a day.

But we hardly see each other.

She does dogs and cats, I do birds and bunnies.

I can't carpool today. I have to tell Jackson I'm sending him to summer school.

Ouch, summer school's the worst.

That's why I made him a special lunch. A steak sandwich.

Ooh.

An entire pumpkin pie.

And a $50 iTunes gift card.

Deej, you could put Selena Gomez in that bag, and it ain't gonna help.

Well, I gotta go.

But I hate saying goodbye to you.

Oh, me too.

I'm really gonna miss you.

I'm really gonna miss you, too.

- See you in ten minutes? - Fifteen if there's traffic.

You know, Deej, you and Matt really got to find some time to connect.

- Jimmy and I connect every day. - Oh, yeah, we do.

Ew! Which is another reason why I want that RV moved.

Hey, don't worry about Matt and me. I'm gonna fix this.

Oh, yeah, you will.

- No. She doesn't like that. - Don't do that? OK.

Hola, amigos.

And now, adiós.

Wait. Where are you sneaking off to?

Nowhere.

Did I just get the cheek?

Mi amor.

Don't " mi amor " me

until you tell me " amor" about what you're up to.

I'm up to nothing.

And now I must go.

Nowhere. With no one. For no reason.

I'm going to be late.

For nothing.

No school! No school!

- Yeah, no school. - No school!

This is gonna be the...

I don't know why, but I can't get that song out of my head.

- Bye, Mom. - Oh, honey, wait.

- Where you going? - With Popko to Mighty Mountain.

Oh, I love that tidal wave ride.

Wait for me.

I'll go get our matching ponchos, and a spare bra.

Nothing is worse than a soggy brassiere.

Mom, you know I love you, but you're kind of a third wheel.

I just wanna hang out with my baby.

Tell you what, if you give me your credit card,

it'll be like a little piece of you is with me everywhere I go.

That is so sweet.

If you need me, I'll be on the couch for the next three months.

Yeah. About that. Hold up.

Just call me Chillaxin' Jackson.

You and I need to talk, and it's a little bit awkward.

Mom, I know where babies come from.

It's about what happened last school year.

About how I crushed it?

Did you?

Because a D-minus in History is not exactly crushing it.

Which is why I've decided you're gonna pull up that bad grade in summer school.

Summer school?

Mom, you can't be serious. I'm gonna be hanging out with Lola all summer.

I don't even know how to process this.

Luckily you don't have to, because school starts today.

Here are your books, and a special lunch.

Don't forget to look under the pie for a please-don't-hate-me gift card.

What? So, like, don't even argue?

Just go?

Mom, you can't do this to me.

I'm Chillaxin' Jackson.

Now you're History Passin' Jackson.

You know, it's just hitting me.

This summer is my last chance to be with Ramona before she's in high school,

and gone forever.

And this summer is my last chance to help Jackson

before he becomes an unemployed moocher who lives on my couch forever.

I hear you talking about me.

- Are you here for summer school? - No, I'm an undercover narc.

Should you be telling me that?

Dude, I'm not a narc.

Ah, got it. You're not a narc.

I can see why you're in summer school.

I'm Roxanne, but they call me Rocki.

- What's your name? - I'm Jackson. The ladies call me J-Money.

- No, they don't. - You're right, they don't.

Little tip, kid. Don't make eye contact with the weird guy with the beard.

He could snap at any moment.

We're starting.

Whoa. That's our teacher?

I saw him in the parking lot, sobbing in a Smart car.

I said, we're starting.

Man, I love living in the Costco parking lot.

They got all these free samples.

These Swedish meatballs are so good, I almost bought some.

But then I thought, "Why? They're free."

You know, Morris, it is so nice of you to let Jimmy keep his RV here.

So, here's the thing.

I like you guys, but Costco wants you off the property

unless you're actually gonna buy something.

Well, then tell Costco to stop giving away free stuff.

Uh, I... I gotta go.