Girls

You okay?

I think I'm having a panic attack.

Oh, man.

I can still breathe, so I don't know if it counts as a panic attack

if I can still breathe, but my heart is really...

maybe slowed down.

Are the kids still in there?

In the classroom where you left them? Yeah.

Great, great.

Apparently Ashanti brought a gerbil to school in her pocket

and crushed its brain,

so they've moved on to bigger and better things.

Is that something that happens a lot?

There's just been a lot going on lately with my... family.

Yeah.

My dad decided that he's, um...

well, I don't know if he decided, he just figured...

he's not...

You know what? Don't need to tell me.

Okay.

I'm gonna go back up there in a second.

I just need to breathe a little

and then I'm gonna be ready to rock.

Everything's under control up there.

You take as much time as you need.

Is this okay?

So I was really inspired by working on his campaign

and, you know, seeing all of the change

that he's already been able to make in his neighborhood

regarding the traffic lights.

It reinvigorated my job search, so here I am.

And I don't think that I need to overplay my résumé, you know?

It's not exhaustive, but I have really stuck with the jobs that I've had

and I am incredibly educated about the current corporate climate

and also what marketing means in the digital age.

Well, I think you just really hit the nail on the head.

I mean, that's the company ethos,

and we want employees who understand the lifestyle and the message,

so I think there is a position you'd be perfect for.

- It involves marketing... - A passion area.

- ...and social media... - Okay, also, like, a joy of mine.

...and acting as a liaison between our Japanese brand leadership

and our American sales team.

Amazing.

Um, but how would you feel about relocating to Tokyo?

At least for the time being.

Um... me?

Yeah, you.

Tokyo.

It's the coolest.

We have a great team of expats working in Tokyo,

and they've all found the city hijo ni subarashii,

which means "very nice" in Japanese.

Japanese is super easy to get the hang of.

It's just, like, four sounds

that you kind of, like, loop around and put together.

It's like, "hi," and then like, "jo."

Um, so, like, how frequently do you go...

travel to Japan?

I have not been.

But I get a lot of visual aids from the Internet

and I have Skyped with people in Tokyo.

I'll go, like, "Hi!"

And they will do "Hi!" back.

Um, can... is, uh... is it possible

to think about it just for a moment?

Totally. Think about it.

I probably need to know by Wednesday, probably.

- Okay. - Okay?

To be completely frank,

Lydia, who is currently holding the position,

is, um, bipolar.

- Oh. - And we are gonna fire her

pretty much the minute she's on a manic upswing. So...

- Japan. - Yeah.

Yes!

Oh, yes!

Oh!

- Hannah. - Hey, Laird.

Wow, glad you made it.

Come in, shoeless, of course.

You sure everything's okay in here?

- 'Cause... - Oh, yeah, yeah.

Those are just shouts of maternal celebration.

Hon Bun, look who it is.

Oh, Hannah.

Hannah. It's my birth, Hannah.

Yeah.

No, it's great. It seems... fun and relaxed.

And, like, you just... you got this, girl.

So I'm gonna head back upstairs. Bye.

No, no, Hannah. Stay, stay, please stay.

Yeah.

Laird is my doula,

and between you and me, he could use a little help.

Well, I'm not officially trained.

Caroline just told me everything she knows

and I already cried once. So...

Is Caroline even a doula?

Yep, almost.

She is almost a doula.

Okay, well, I don't actually think this is legal,

to self-doula.

Yeah, this is pretty legal, right?

Fuck the legal system.

Uh, we're trying to keep a positive spin on things.

This baby is a month and a half early,

but it knows that we are ready, right?

We are ready and waiting for you to come out.

Oh, you want Hannah to stay?

Oh, you want Hannah to stay? Yeah, that's a great idea.

- That is so beautiful. - Thank you.

- Antique. Yeah. - Congratulations.

Oh, my God, you're a record company president. You do not care about my ring.

- No, of course I do. - I'm such a dork!

- Oh, my God, I'm so embarrassed. - No, it's beautiful.

- Congratulations. - Thank you.

Thank you. We're so happy.

Marriage is such an antiquated concept on so many levels,

but until they discover something better,

you know, this is really the only way I know how

to express my eternal devotion to Marnie.

Oh, my God.

Plus, I don't believe in tattoos,

so this is our only option.

All I can say is that marriage is the best thing I ever did.

- I love hearing that. - Oh, God, yeah.

How long have you been married for, Marcos?

Um, ten years now, including this most recent separation.

- Oh. - I'm sorry to hear that.

I mean, actually, the hardest part is actually

just trying to FaceTime with Piper and she's only three.

She keeps trying to touch Daddy's face through the screen

and gets really confused and starts...

Wow, I'm really sorry.

No, I'm sorry.

- Holy shit, I'm sorry. - No.

You guys are not lunatics, so you're gonna make it.

And let's talk about the showcase.

I just want to get your equipment needs

so I can get them to the guitar techs and everyone.

Wow, totally.

I can't believe how hands-on you are.

You're the label president. This is crazy.

No, no, let's just pretend we're all doing this together in a garage somewhere.

Okay, well, all of our gear is in the back of Desi's truck,

so it won't be that hard to pretend.

- Great, I'll be your roadie. - Perfect.

Why don't you guys do that? Let me get this.

Bye, Ray-Ray.

Ray...

I gotta settle up. We had three espressos,

two of these delicious scones, and, um, one glass of water.

Water's free.

Oh, that's a very generous policy.

Hey, Ray, let me ask you something, man.

Are we solid?

Excuse me?

Are you and I solid, you know?

Are we simpatico?

Because sometimes I get this sense that there's some...

tension or like a bad line.

Not really between us, but specifically from you to me.

Well, I really wouldn't worry about it if I were you.

Okay, but you know what?

I do worry about those kinds of things

'cause I'm exactly the kind of person that needs to know

that none of my lines are faulty, you know?

That-that I'm making everybody around me happy.

- That make sense? - It does, it does make sense.

Unfortunately, Desi, you're not gonna get that assurance from me today.

- Okay. - Okay?

Can you expound on that?

You're not gonna get that assurance from me

because I fucking hate you.

Well, I totally get that we're from very different parts of the world,

and I don't expect everybody here to...

fully understand my kind of Pacific Northwest thing.

Your whole Boston vibe can be very abrasive.

- Okay, that's... - Desi, this isn't about where you're from.

- Okay. - Okay?

- This isn't about geography. - Uh-huh.

This is about that distressed shirt you're wearing.

This is about the fact that you have eyeliner on your face right now.

This is about the fact that your musical sensibility is insufferable.

Don't ever think that you get onstage anywhere

where a vast majority of the crowd doesn't think "douche."

Douche.

You know how you feel when you watch Imagine Dragons play?

Well, that's how we feel about you.

And you know what? Imagine Dragons are great and you're the douche.

You know, if we just take a minute

and put our hearts together, you and me right here,

I think we'll both find

that we're not really all that different.

But we are different.

We are very different, because I would never treat her like shit.

Who, Marnie?

Yes, Marnie. Marnie Michaels.

Okay, now you're talking about my fiancée,