Amori miei (My Loves)

Yes, I have.

Yes, but I already said that.

Yes, thank you. Well, possibly.

Okay. See you soon. Goodbye, thank you.

Damn ... Oh, Anna!

So ... Miss?

- Yes? - Call my wife.

I tried, but the line is busy.

- Try again. - Start with London?

No, my wife first!

Hello, pussycat, my love! How are you?

I beg your pardon? But who is speaking?

I'm sorry Mr. Klein. I thought I was talking to my wife.

Could you hold on a moment? Just hold on.

- Hello. Who is this? - Finally I can talk to you!

I've been cooking since this morning! I've prepared a dinner with all the trimmings!

There is Peking roast duck, chicken with fries, ...

Spaghetti carbonara .. and then the cake!

You're very sweet, but I have London on the line.

Don't hang up, please! This is seventh time that I've called you!

Just a minute, wait. Are you there, eh?

A moment. Yes?

Hello? One moment, Miss, the sauce will burn. For heaven's sake, eh?

Yes? Hello? Yes, I hear you! Then, at 9:00 exactly!

I'll be waiting! I love you, Marco! I'll be waiting ... I love you ...

# I'll wait and I love you, I love you and I'll wait ... #

Ah, yes ...

A Message?

It's 03:00 at night. It's laughable, I fall for it every time.

The cake and I have been waiting up for you until now, ...

.. Then we collapsed.

Whatever you had to say, write it. Tomorrow I'll read the piece in the newspaper.

Good night.

Dear? Handsome, are you awake?

Hey, Marco!

There it is ... He's already left.

- Cicciolona, meow, good morning. - Cicciolona ... meow ... Good morning.

- Did you sleep well? - Yes.

- Sorry, I have to leave for a moment. - I figured that out.

But I'll be back. Stop arranging the newspapers.

- There's a nice surprise for you. - Where?

In the bedroom.

- No, no! Stop! - Why?

A call from the newspaper. I have to do an important interview.

I should swear.

- It's urgent. - As usual.

Tonight I wanted to take you to the theater! That was the surprise.

- You can go alone, then tell me about it. - You know how I divert myself ...

- The tickets are on the table. - Of course.

- Tomorrow is my Sunday of freedom. - Thank goodness.

- We'll be together! I have so many things ... - ... to tell you!

They've butchered my article. It's shortened.

- Did you say something? - No, why love?

No, nothing, I was hoping for it. In the morning I can never see your face.

You look a bit pale today.

- Ah, it's your hands that are pale! - As you wish, my love.

- Do you remember me? - Yes.

- Hm ... You're welcome. - I spend my life waiting for you!

You, you're either at the newspaper or write the newspaper or think about the newspaper!

I don't live with a man, I live with a newspaper! I'm bored!

Well, enough with this story! If you get bored, find a job!

- You don't have twenty more years! - Me?!

You aren't twenty any more!

How can you say "You don't have twenty more years" to a woman who is only 35?

My mistake, I shouldn't have married a man younger than me.

So then ... Only three months, to be exact, 80 days!

Too many, because in 80 days you can go ... around the world, if you want!

I'm too busy for that.

Better to say that you have no time to live with me, to love me!

- Say you don't love me anymore! - I love you, but you don't have the time to notice!

Because you have too much time, a sea of time! Any love would drown.

You have to find an interest, an occupation!

But you're my occupation! I'm a wife, don't you understand?

Since childhood, I was prepared for this type of occupation!

- What time is it? - It's the only job I can do and the only one that I like!

They had me playing with dolls and I can't have children!

They taught me how to make sauces and you don't ... What is it?

And you never eat! What should I do? Cook for one?!

I'm tired, I just can't anymore, I'm at the limit!

You don't need me and I need you!

I feel like a bottle of wine put on the table of a teetotaler!

I feel useless! There!

- Anna, what's wrong? - You live for that newspaper!

You too, love. Can you tell me what we would eat without this newspaper?

So we wouldn't eat the same. The few times I'm with you, what do you talk about?

Sports, Taxes, home, health, work, politics!

You never talk about anything interesting, you never talk about us.

If you want me to feel more engaged, take care of me more!

- I love you! Isn't that enough? - Love is not enough.

Yes it is! Even for me it's too much!

Anna, I can't hold all of you. Love me less! By half!

What do you mean "by half"? You should say: "Double"!

You should say: "Again, again"!

- Answer me! - I didn't catch that. Would you mind going back to 33 rpm?

And don't drop ashes on the carpet!

But you look at this stuff! I think about you all day!

Where are my things? Get rid of these damn pillows!

By half!

Marco! What is he doing? He's gone? He gets angry because I love him?

He had to make a scene if I didn't love him.

Crazy stuff ... He says: "Love me by half". But I can't.

Is it my fault if I'm full of love? If there is only him in my head?

Look here ... A marriage in crisis because of too much love! It's absurd!

My God, it's hard to live for two.

The fact is that we got married without much preparation.

You study to become doctors and engineers for years and years!

Anything to become husbands and wives? Oh, no!

Talking about marriage, We're a bunch of illiterates.

But now I'll study, I'll prepare myself, until I know everything on the subject ...

And I will make my marriage ... a masterpiece!

You liked the lesson! You recorded it word for word.

It was very interesting. That man knows everything.

This professor is an authority on the subject.

'' Professor Antonio Bianchi, Order of ...''

'' Ordinary''? He seemed so distinguished to me.

To recapitulate: Couples are divided into four types.

What precision!

You and me are the same as you; you and me are the same as me; ...

.. You and me are the same as you and me, that is, everyone thinks of themselves.

Fortunately that isn't my case, so ...

The fourth type, the ideal one, that is, you and me equals us, ...

.. is a utopia, it doesn't exist in reality.

Oh, no, there I disagree.

Good, when a woman agrees with me, I'm always afraid I'm wrong.

- Oh, professor! - Good morning! - Good morning!

Excuse me, but ... I believe ... I really believe in marriage.

When two people love each other they become one, right?

Why are you laughing?

This cynicism is just a great pose to me.

- I'm sure you're a great husband. - I'm a bachelor, young lady.

- But how! With everything you know about the marriage? - Exactly.

- What a waste! - You see, Miss ... - Yes, right away.

Women are made to be married, ...

While men .. are made to remain bachelors.

- All evil comes from that. - That's nonsense.

- But it's one of the happiest paradoxes! - We're talking about a serious matter.

Dear Miss, the term "Marriage" has no meaning in itself.

Marriage with whom? When? Where? Why?

In Arabia a man can marry as many women as his finances allow.

It's a hell. A man is not enough for one woman, let alone two, three ...

- How true that is. - However, Marriage works in Kurumba.

You know the customs and morals of the Kurumbiani, don't you?

- Well, Kurumba ... - They are identical to those of the Nagara and Dadaga.

Ah, now I see ... it escaped me.

If we lived in Malabar, then yes, it would be worthwhile to get married.

Because, you see, in Malabar, among the people of Kurumba ...

they practice Biandria.

- Er ... biandria? - Yes, it is from the greek: '' Bi'','' two'','' andros'','' man''.

It's a kind of reverse bigamy: a woman may marry two men.

- Excuse me, but ... does it work? - Oh, perfectly, perfectly!

The woman is a being emotionally much richer than a man.

So it can satisfy all her emotional needs.

On the other hand, the man finds a ... say, partner ...

To divide the responsibilities .. and expenses that a wife entails.

In short, a perfect household.

And you think that here ... this is possible?

- The biandria? - Yes, the biandria.

It's a question of civilization, but I think that sooner or later ... we'll get there.

Then, the crisis of the couple will be resolved.

Well, Now, I apologize, but unfortunately I have to leave.

- I greet you, dear lady ... Miss ... ? - Ann ... Lisa.

- Lisa. - Lisa. - Study, apply yourself. - Very well.

- Goodbye. - Goodbye.

Biandria ... it would solve the crisis of couples ...

It's just a word! How?

Eh ... why not? Why not?

- Professor! Professor! Excuse me, I wanted to say ... - Yes?

Well, now I'm fine.

The lessons of the professor have solved all my problems.

To save my marriage, I have to imitate the women of Kurumba.

I did that. Two months ago, I married for the second time.

How, with whom? With him, With the professor.

How sweet ... how he understands me ... and how we love each other.

Yes, I'm a bigamist. In fact, a biandrica.

I know you would like to ask me why I didn't make him my lover like everyone else.

Why disapprove? Certainly, the husband ignores the existence of a lover.

But the lover knows that her husband exists and suffers from it. Very much so!

For me, lovers have always had a penalty ...

I told both of them that I had found a job at an advertising agency ...

.. and that I had to go to Milan three times a week.

What a party when I get back! And so, the beginning of a perfect life!

Varied, rich, without lapses of boredom, without discussions!

Love full time! Anna, three days with Marco.

Lisa, three days with Antonio. And on the holidays? Alternating.

In short, a perfect system, fair, impartial.

Maybe because I'm a Libra ...

Oh ... Oh dear ... again ...

If you were not sure I can't have children, ...

these Would be .. the classic symptoms of a ...

However, for the sake of caution, I had testing done.

Let's hear what the doctor says.

Yes .. God forbid ... it would be nice!

Hello? Good morning, doctor, it's me. What did the frog say?

What? Mama? I'll be a Mama? I'll have a baby?

So, I'll be mom and he pa ...

...pa? Which one?

Hello, doctor, no, I can't have children, it's not possible.

It's too complicated. Not a chance.

Yes, I'm married, I'm very married. You have no idea how married I am.

But ... Thanks for the good wishes.