Udta Punjab (उड़ता पंजाब)

Take out the packet.

Come on, Shamsher. Go for it!

Hurry up.

Look! Look! Look! Look...

Look up you wasted folk, Right here into my face.

Hold your arms tight, I'm shooting up this place!

Life's a thrill ride, I'm gonna hit top speed

Freedom and liberty, It's all in the weed.

Don't shy away from high, Screw those asking why!

If they don't let you try, Just shoot them in the eye!

I'll sing in my jammies, I'll sing in the nude,

Got a problem? Get off my hood!

I am what I am, The coolest dude!

Don't mess with me, I'm an eagle on the prowl.

I'm the daddy of swag, Tsunami unleashed!

Fans across the world, No time to pause.

All groove to my song, Thugs or cops alike.

Don't bullshit me, I can read the future.

You follow your god, I need no nurture.

Oh darling white one, Oh darling white one,

You're our beloved happiness!

Oh sweet sugar, oh sweet sugar,

One sniff is eternal bliss.

Punjab is flying high!

Oh brother Romeo

This is your true Juliet!

Draw up that line,

Snort the heaven inside.

Punjab is flying high!

They shall soar,

The ones who sniff it all.

You shall win,

And will meet your Lucy in the sky.

Punjab is flying high!

She is white but She speaks Punjabi.

She rules the mighty state of Punjab!

She's a ball of fire, Roll up in her charm.

Shoot up your nerves, Her love's crawling in

Her love is crawling in! Her love is crawling in!

In the country, markets, She's everywhere

She's a friend to Traders of the dark world

In weddings, funerals, She's everywhere

In parties, dark alleys, She quietly sneaks in

She cuts across boundaries, across times

She's always there, In your living, in dying

Trade your life with her euphoria.

It's her time now.

Boy, girl, woman, man, You can't escape her

She'll strike a blow, You scream with joy!

Like a kite,

Punjab is flying in the air!

A Punjab of myriad colors,

Has blown up in white.

WELCOME TO PUNJAB!

Hello...

This is Bhandi speaking...

Told you not to get Shamsher along.

The loser can't aim.

You think I have nothing better to do?

I can't find it.

Just can't! You are making a fool out of me.

I don't have time for all this.

Oh no, sister f****r!! Patrol officers are here!

I'll be busted, a**h***s!

Tommy Singh in the house!

Listen up!

Tommy's got a tongue sharp like Ecstasy.

Tommy's lips taste like Heroin's intimacy.

Tommy's c*&k is white as Coke's supremacy!

Tommy's c*&k is white as Coke's supremacy!

C*&k-coke, coke-c*&k, C*&k-coke, oh yeah, I am so high!

Shut it down!

Bro, this is f****king killer stuff!

I am telling you, we are going to Kill it, the market is...

Coke-c*&k, coke-c*&e... It's going to be an anthem, man.

I can see it. I can so f****king see it, man.

Yo, bro! Coke-c*&k is the stuff. Coke- c*&k is the scene

This is the international stuff.

I tell you, this is going to be the next swag!

UK, Canada... Tommy, you are a bloody poet!

'GABRU!

Isn't it a super hit?

Can we hear the rest of the songs?

The thing is... it's work in progress.

Sunday... probably Monday... Wednesday it'll be done for sure!

Have been hearing that since three months.

The release date has been pushed twice already.

The hoardings have gone up twice.

You know what? We didn't sign up for this.

Son, hear me out. Could you talk to him...

I'm really sorry.

We'll just have to call the deal off, yeah?

Bye! - We can work something out.

I've been away for dozen years, brought myself a little frock.

Tommy sets off a party, as he yanks his white c*&k!

Coke-c*&k, coke-c*&k...

Time to let your mind unblock, Coke-c*&k, coke-c*&k...

Those who bug, give 'em a sock. Coke-c*&k, coke-c*&k...

M ot herf***** s!

The deal is off!

Juggle your nuts now!

F**k]

Hello, Tommy. Are you there? Hello.

You fired me, a**hole!

No no, Tommy. You are misunderstanding me.

Yes, you did.

No, Tommy. Don't say that. You know...

it just wasn't working out... okay?

Wasn't working out? Sister f****r, who am I?

Your girlfriend? Am I your f**king girlfriend?

What do you want me to say, Tommy?

Say it to my face.

You fired me.

Say it.

Say it. - Alright, man.

I fired you. Yeah, got it?

He says that he's fired me.

He fired me, f****kr!

Nobody fires Tommy!

Alright.

Brother, brother... - Nobody.

Give it to him, f****kr!

Speedy, you sister f***kr, listen to me!

Tommy's got record labels queuing till Jalandhar & Chandigarh.

Only Tommy fires Tommy. Are you f**king Tommy?

Listen up, f****r! - What the f***k are you laughing at?

F****kr, you Whatsapp dad begging for a concert with Tommy?

Suck on that! - You sh*t!

F**king s**t! - And what is your worth?

The best record labels in the world want Tommy!

Not you! You bloody ear-grease!

Who's the GABRU!? - Who's your Daddy?!

Ask your hot wife who's the GABRU!?

Speedy, we'll split your behind open...

and do a concert in there, - You f***kr!

You!!

I fire you. I double fire you.

Speedy, you bought an S-class?

Move... move!

You f***kr!

Nobody fires Tommy!

Be careful.

Only Tommy fires Tommy!

I'm the GABRU!

Speedy, I'll f**k you over!

Ram into his bloody car!

Overtake him from the right and make him stop!

Speedy, you motherf***kr!

Ambush his damn car, f***kr!

Be careful, bro.

F**k, are you crazy?

Do you find this funny?

Do you? The deal's off and you're laughing?

You are past your expiry date, babe.

It's over.

Really? - Really.

And so are you, Tommy. So are you!

Why are the lights off?

Switch on the lights.

Anyone home?

Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you!

Tommy, the GABRU!

Party!

There are cities in Mexico...

where the cops can't put a foot in.

Really?

Drug lords are the bloody law.

Don't get me wrong...

but what have the police done here?

The situation is the same.

The situation is the same? - Yes, brother.

Stop that sister f****r!

Stop him.

Stop him! - Get him down.

Get down.

Brilliant!

Where are your papers?

It is election time.

Driving without papers, a**h*le?

Look at the packaging.

With proper branding.

First it was those mini-vans

now they're getting them in trucks.

This is what they call progress.

Green revolution, part two.

But what about our progress?

Our cut is still the same. F****ng 10,000 rupees!

Can we get anything in 10,000? - No.

I think they've taken the Punjab police for granted.

There's no regard for law and order here.

If this continues, Punjab will become Mexico.

Sister f*****r, you will turn Punjab into Mexico? - No, sir.

I will not, sir!

I feel he surely will.

No, sir. I will not turn it to a Mexico. Never!

Tell your boss to up our commission.

It's a red light here!

No green light.

Yes, sir. - F**k off!

Make it quick... move!