Ivan Vasilievich: Back to the Future (Ivan Vasilevich menyaet professiyu )

MOSFILM

AN ExPERIMENTAL ARTISTIC ASSOCIATION PRESENTS

A NON-SCIENCE-FICTION, NOT QUITE REALISTIC

AND NOT STRICTLY HISTORICAL FILM

BASED ON M. BULGAKOV'S PLAY "IVAN VASSILYEVICH"

IVAN VASSILYEVICH CHANGES OCCUPATION

Written by V. BAKHNOV, L. GAIDAl

Directed by L. GAIDAl

Directors of Photography S. POLUYANOV, V. ABRAMOV

Production Designer Ye. KUMANKOV

Music by A. ZATSEPIN

Starring

YURI YAKOVLEV LEONID KURAVLYOV

ALExANDER DEMYANENKO SAVELY KRAMAROV

NATALYA SELEZNYOVA NATALYA BELOGORTSEVA-KRACHKOVSKAYA

NATALYA KUSTINSKAYA VLADIMIR ETUSH

MIKHAIL PUGOVKIN SERGEY FILIPPOV, and others

Long live Tsar Boris Fyodorovich!

Long live our father, our tsar!

Glory!

Damn!

Hey, what's the matter? No electricity again!

It's outrageous! Timofeyev has burned the fuses again!

- Comrade Timofeyev, when will it end? - I'm finishing.

When will be the end of your experiments

which leave our whole building without electricity?

There you go.

Ivan Vassilyevich, if you knew what an important invention

I'm working on, you wouldn't have said that.

Experiments with electricity should be done at your office,

and at home electricity must be used only for peacefuI, domestic purposes!

How many times did I tell you...

I'm on leave, so I work at home. And anyway, my experiments are safe.

As the public representative, I demand that you stop it!

Today you've burned the fuses, tomorrow you'll burn the house!

STUPID

And what is this?

You see? That's the result. Pah!

I'll need to raise the voltage.

Dangerous! Of course, it's dangerous, but, as they say, nothing ventured...

Your only love is not so easily found.

Our planet's turning, round and round.

The planet's flying in everyday beat.

It's very hard to fall in love on it.

A winter blizzard is raging,

And thunderstorms are blazing,

And stars in the sky are racing, and cities din in the rain.

And people don't see each other,

They just pass by each other,

They always lose each other,

Never to find again.

But there's somewhere my only love,

My unforgettable,

My true big love.

I look for it,

But in everyday beat

It's hard for us to meet.

A winter blizzard is raging,

And thunderstorms are blazing,

And stars in the sky are racing,

And cities din in the rain.

And people don't see each other,

They just pass by each other,

They always lose each other,

Never to find again.

Never to find again.

I can imagine what's going to happen!

I hope we can avoid a scandaI!

Those scandals are so tiresome.

I was divorced three times.

Yes, that's right, three times. Zyuzin doesn't count.

I've never been as nervous as today.

Well, I'm going to do it!

Oh, Shurik!

Your apparatus is going to kill you!

My apparatus, Zinochka, will make me famous. And you, too.

Really?

I'm sorry to bother you,

but I have terrible news for you.

My gloves have been stolen from me today.

And I fell in love with another man. Do you understand, Shurik?

- Yes, your gloves. What about them? - Forget the gloves. I love another man.

Well, it's done!

Only, please, no objections, and don't make scenes!

What? Are you asking who is the man?

You probably think it's Molchanovsky? No, you're wrong.

Zupperman? Wrong again.

All right! Let's not beat about the bushes.

He is... film director Yakin.

Well, well, well.

It's strange though. It happens for the first time in my life.

The man is told that his wife is leaving him, and he says, well, well.

At the very least, it's impolite.

You mean that tall, blond man?

Unbelievable! To show so little interest in his own wife!

The blond one is Molchanovsky. Can't you remember it? Molchanovsky.

And Yakin is... Yakin is very talented!

What? You ask where we're going to live?

Today we're leaving for Gagry to look for the film's location.

And later, he will be given a flat. Of course, if he's not Iying.

Sure, he is Iying!

Oh, all this is so ridiculous!

To insult a man because you're jealous!

He can't be Iying every minute!

During my many sleepless nights, I've been thinking,

and I came to the conclusion that we're no match for each other.

Can't you understand, Alexander, that I live in the world of cinema, of art!

But your calmness just amazes me!

You know, Shurik, I even feeI like making a scene.

- No, don't do it. - You think so?

- I'm sure. - A-ha.

Goodbye, Shurik.

But don't canceI my house registration. Who knows what might happen.

Alexander Sergeyevich!

Please, tell Zinaida Mikhailovna that Rozalia Frantsevna said

that Kapitolina Nikiforovna offered Anna Ivanovna a fur coat...

Zinaida Mikhailovna has left.

- Where for? - With her lover.

What do you mean, with her lover? And you're so calm about it?

- You're a very strange man. - Excuse me, I'm very busy.

You are some character!

If I were your wife, I would have left, too.

If you were my wife, I would have hanged myself.

You jerk!

Is that the dentaI clinic? Hallo?

Extension 3-62?

May I speak to Anton Shpak, please?

Anton, that's for you.

- Who's calling? - A woman.

Keep your mouth open.

Speaking.

Anton Semyonovich? Hello. At what time do you finish today?

I'm an actress. No, you don't know me, but I'm dying to meet you.

So you work untiI four? I'll call again, I'm very persistent.

I'm looking forward to it!

Well, let's continue.

A.S. Shpak

How lucky for me to drop by!

Folks, keep your money in a bank!

Naturally, if you have it!

What do you care about my relations with my wife?

It's none of your business whether we're divorcing or not.

That's our personaI matter.

No, that's a public matter. Your divorces lower our indices.

- What do You want from me? - Wait untiI the end of the quarter.

Then you may divorce as much as you like.

When you're talking, Ivan Vassilyevich, it looks like a raving.

What do you mean?

And about your suspicious machine.

I'm asking you to file an application.

Do it, or we'll file a complaint.

Wait. Wait! There's nothing suspicious about my apparatus.

I simply invented a time machine.

In other words, I can run through space and go back to the past.

- Go back to the past? - Yes, to the past.

These experiments, Alexander,

can be done only by permission of the appropriate authorities.

Wait, Ivan Vassilyevich. This apparatus can be very usefuI.

Let me explain.

That's it!

And now we're going to test the time machine.

You're witnessing a historic event.

First, we'll try a close distance.

Look, we're going to run through space.

- Did You see it? - What?

- You see? - What is it?

What happened?

Alexander Sergeyevich, where is the wall?

What is it? What's going on? There was a wall here!

Timofeyev, you will answer for it in court. Inventing such a machine!

Go to hell with your wall!

- Half a flat has vanished. - No big deaI.

What do you mean, no big deaI?

I've seen some technicaI wonders, but nothing like that.

- Excuse me, and who are you? - Are you asking who I am?

- I'm a friend of Anton Shpak. - And what are you doing in his flat?

What am I doing?

I'm waiting for my friend.

And how did you get into his flat if he's not here?

Oh, go to hell! What kind of questions are those?

Never mind. I've gone through time. I've made it!

Tell me, can you lift any wall like that?

A wall?!

Your invention is invaluable.

- Congratulations. - Thank you.

Why are you staring at me? There're no pictures, nor flowers growing on me.

You're wearing the same imported suede jacket as Shpak does.

Really? Ajacket? A suede jacket?

Is Shpak the only one in Moscow who has a suede jacket?

What is your name?

I'm an artiste of all big and small academic theatres.

And my name is too famous to pronounce it.

Do you want to get back to Shpak's room? I can open the wall for you.

I'd better take a look at your machine.

- I like it. - I'm very glad!

You're my first witness.

It's my first time being a witness.

Why are you staring? You're going to rub a hole through me with your eyes.

Do you realize what you have just seen?

You bet! But tell me...