The Stroll (Прогулка)

I'm sick of your music! Turn down the volume.

Turn it down!

It turned out you are good in women.

Well, at least betterthan you are.

Women don't have will-power, thanks God.

I don't have will-power?

Don't worry, I'll put you in your place.

I hope I'm at my place already.

You can hope.

- You'll get it in the neck. - I'm kidding.

Pull over.

- I'm starting. Note the time. - Go. I'll be watching.

- Have I ever lied to you? - But don't turn off your phone.

And you don't call every minute.

The Stroll

No, you can't.

And why?

Because I don't give my names to strangers.

And you are right in that.

Giving names to strangers is too flippant, it's a bad form

and I would even say that it's a vulgarity.

What beautiful eyes you have! What's your name?

I'm not telling you.

If you want I can call you Stranger.

Do you know, there is a picture with such name.

It's now being printed on candy wrapping.

Actually, you can see it here in a museum.

It's not "Stranger", it's "Unknown".

And it's not here, it's in Moscow, in Tretyakovskaya Gallery.

As always, everything that's good is in Moscow. Like a tragedy.

At least I can console, that girls in our city are more intelligent.

- Me? - Yes, you.

Do you study or work?

I'm just walking.

My name is Alexey.

Do you mind having a company? I love walking with mysterious ladies.

- Maria suits you. Maria, the name. - Maria?

I'd call you Mary.

No my name is Olya, as simple as that.

Olga, Olga, Olga. Something very ancient.

Some queens, Tatar incursions, a long narrow river,

sad songs of the north people.

- Let's go to the north, Olga. - To the north?

We'll be in fur and hide and I'll show you a passionate dance.

Slow it down.

- You talk too much. - Maybe.

You don't have to show off. I'm already walking with you.

- Let's be informal. - What a wonderful idea!

I didn't dare to ask that first.

- Where are we going to? - Where are we going to?

Just walking. I like just walking and looking around.

The weather is great.

I don't see anything what is worthy of special attention.

All attention is paid to certain Olya.

- Do you see a man in a red T-shirt? - Yes.

He's waving his hands. I've been watching him for a long time.

- He is a complete idiot. - You really think so?

- Wanna try? - OK. Let's.

Excuse me.

- Hello. - Hello.

- Would you like to go to a theatre? - With you, babe?

- Where are you going, baby? - Sorry, good bye.

It's really impressing.

- Are you always so good in people? - Almost.

Can you say something about this woman in the light skirt?

Of course.

Lazy, untidy, a mess in herflat. She thinks about meeting her prince.

- How do you know that? - Do you see unshaved legs?

That means she is lazy, untidy, not interested in men who surround her,

varicose veins, that means she gave a birth.

And she's wearing a white skirt, because she wants to attract men's attention.

How did you know she had scandals with her husband?

Just my imagination. Maybe that was her reason of divorce.

She is not an interesting subject to talk about.

- What did you think about me? - About you?

You are funny, foppish, like to be in the centre of attention.

Then, there was something else what I thought about you.

- What was that? - Not gonna tell you.

- Come on, tell me. - I won't. You'd get offended.

- I won't. Please tell me. - No.

You are not lucky with girls.

- You're right. - You see?

- How did you guess? - Somehow.

You just fall in love with wrong ones.

I have a friend, Petyunya, he is very easy.

He tells me, that I sense bitches.

- Are you a bitch? - No, I'm a very nice girl.

- But, of course, I have some bitching. - I appreciate your honesty.

Hey, what do you think about yourself?

- About myself? - Yes.

- I like dreaming. - And what do you dream about?

- I pretend to be sugar. - Swimming in a glass?

No. Like I am a brick of sugar. Very refractory, hard.

I'm in hot tea or coffee and I start melting.

I go to the bottom, I lie there, merge with water, sweeten the drink.

And one can also break me with a spoon. I hate when people do that.

When they try to break me in the bottom of the glass.

- I hate it. - Why do you hate that? Can you explain?

It's not me who hates it. The sugar hates it.

- Are you serious? - You think I'm sick?

One day, when I was taking a bath I pretended to be Bill Clinton.

What? What were you doing?

I was divorcing Hillary and marrying Monica.

Monica is fat.

So what? We live in London, play saxophone, dance salsa.

You can't imagine how good that is!

Of course I understand, I'm old enough, but I still can do things!

By the way, Monica presented a bike to my birthday.

It's a great think. We were riding along the city.

By the way, my hair gets grey.

People say, grey hair looks good to me.

The only thing which worries me is my daughter, Chelsea.

She is a unique child. She doesn't understand anything.

She is on mother's side. I tried to talk to her, but she doesn't understand.

Why are you laughing? Stop laughing.

Everybody dreams about that, but not everybody admits that.

When I was a child I wanted to be a traffic-controller.

- And you? - I wanted to draw lines on roads.

Those which are at crossings.

Beautiful dream. Beautiful. I understand you.

Do you dream about anything now?

I don't know. I don't think so.

But I always interview myself.

Recently I gave a press conference about developing of Russian economics.

It was broadcasted on all TV channels and newspapers quoted that too.

And, by the way, it was in a bath too.

You are like me. My congratulations. You are sick too.

- You are an amazing girl. - I agree.

Let's drink something. Let's sit somewhere, I'll call Petya.

I must introduce him such a wonderful girl.

Are you talking about the one who calls girls bitches?

You can introduce me to him, but I won't go to any place.

Firstly, I don't drink, secondly, I can't sit.

Do you have piles?

Very funny.

I'm sorry, I didn't mean that. It was idiotic.

- Stupid and boorish. - I'm sorry, but why can't you sit?

I won't tell you to spite you.

- Please, tell me. - I won't.

Please.

I can't sit, because I fell off a horse.

- Say what? Fell off a horse? - I injured my spinal column.

Now I have to walk a lot and l can't sit.

- Do you work in a circus? - You starting it again?

No, really.

No, I do equestrian sport. I'm a jockey.

Ah, it's when horses dance?

- Yes, yes. - Great.

And those who sit on horses have crooked legs.

- What? - Don't be mad.

Nonsense.

What's the name of the horse?

Diamond. It's a stallion. I had Rook before him.

He was written off. He was old.

Is it your phone or mine?

I think it's mine.

Hello. Hi. Wait.

Yes.

Yes. As we agreed.

OK. Bye.

- May I ask you a tactless question? - Shoot.

- Who was that? - My coach, Vsevolod Maksimych.

- Your coach? - Yes.

Why were you so informal with him?

I've been known him since my childhood. We all are informal with each other.

It's a very rude world.

- And you curse too? - Sometimes.

And you thought I'm a modest girl. I think such girls are artificial.

Like in old books when old ladies fainted away.

All my life I dreamt to faint away.

I wish to feel dizziness just once in my life. Never.

- I feel so bad right now. Wait. - Olya, what's happened?

- I don't know what it is. - Do you have a stomach-ache?

Did you buy it? Yes?

It's a way how to fool men.

You believe in everything.

These pigeons went crazy.

You think, that we, girls, only wash up in a bathroom?

Actually, I don't wanna know in details what you do there.

How are you gonna live with your wife?

Do you think she's gonna go to neighbours?

You seem to be too experienced.

Are you married?

Oh, no. Don't wanna be married.

Why?

- Because I like being with myself. - And with me?

With you?

Well, it's OK.

- So marry me then. - What did you say?

You know what, let's do that in... 14 minutes.

- Why in 14? - Why not?

Are you kidding again oryou are serious?

Actually, people don't say such things to little known men.

- Do you believe in love at first sight? - Of course not.

Where are you going?

Mister policeman, do you believe in love at first sight?

Do you believe in love at first sight or not?

Are you OK?

I want to know if our law machinery believes in love at first sight.

- You see? - Don't take it seriously.