Go On

Scuse me, are you Lauren Bennett?

My God, you are.

You are my favorite loss group facilitator of all time.

I saw you do a trust fall at the Meadowlands in '88,

and you blew my mind, you blew my mind.

This is the first time we're bumping into each other

outside of group, that's... Fun.

It is fun and informative.

I have a window into your closely guarded private life.

Man, it's Friday night.

I've had two margaritas.

I'm not really prepared for all your Ryan-ness.

So what's the context? Sexy dress.

Another glass of wine.

Is it a boy? Is it a girl? It's a boy.

Hey.

Wyatt, this is Ryan.

Hey.

I know Ryan from... how would you like me to characterize it?

I'm one of her crazies.

Straight shooter. That's great.

Yeah. It wears thin.

So, Wyatt, what's your deal?

You know what? It's none of my business.

The nature of your relationship is not my purview.

Be he your boyfriend, the executor of your will...

Is he your boyfriend?

Or maybe I'm just like, a super aggressive busboy.

He's got game. I like him.

Okay, please don't be on his... You know what?

This whole thing is making me feel just a little... wah!

So we're gonna move.

No, no, no. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

I can control myself, I promise. I won't make it weird.

Okay.

Look, it's Lauren, and she's with a guy!

- Lauren! - Hi!

Hi.

This is the third time I've been to a restaurant.

They might make it weird.

Go On 1x06 Big League Chew Original Air Date on October 09, 2012

This is so exciting.

What are the odds that we have our monthly outing,

- and you're here? - Oh, so slim.

It's a margarita.

Those have alcohol.

What's his name?

Guys, I'm Wyatt. It's nice to meet you.

- I like your teeth. - Thank you.

- Can I have one? - You don't have to answer him.

What's their relationship?

Well, obviously, she's here on a date.

Am I the only normal one here?

Never thought about you as a woman.

Now you've been sexualized.

I can't stop picturing you in sexual scenarios.

Please stop. Please find a way to stop.

No, now I'm picturing her in sexual scenarios too.

What are you picturing?

She's in a flowy, white harem dress,

and there's pillows everywhere.

Ooh, that's good. I'm totally putting pillows in mine.

Okay, we're gonna go to another restaurant.

- No. - Okay, wait.

But before we go, let me guess.

Cat lady, Sonia. Happy guy, Danny.

Ryan, Fausta, Mr. K,

Owen, and Yolanda.

You talked to him about us?

Told him our personal stuff?

You think I'm Yolanda?

What do you think Wyatt is on a scale from 1 to 10?

About two more than you.

There's no such thing as a 12. It's a scale from 1 to 10.

Hey! You forgot your purse!

Thanks, Hector. And thanks for the ride.

So if you want to pick me up... You know what? I'll just walk.

I think that's Danny's wife's boyfriend.

Cheating wife's the worst.

Dead wife's not great.

No, it's not.

- Hey, guys. - Hey.

Great day?

Is it? Is it really?

- You talking about Hector? - Yeah.

He's cool.

He's been driving me around since he totaled my truck.

Why was he driving your truck?

His car is very important to him.

He didn't want to drive in that bad neighborhood to buy nitrous.

You know, I haven't figured out Danny yet,

but I'm gonna get to the bottom of that guy.

Let me save you some time. He's a blockhead.

Guess who's at the snack table again.

He ate four entrees last night.

Where is the last cruller?

Here it is.

What is this? I don't like this.

Dude, you're grief eating. We've all been through it.

After loss, you fill the void with food.

For me, it was lettuce with French dressing.

So boring.

For me it was cheese...

Slices, wedges, cubes, logs...

Like playing a game of grief tetris

that no shape of cheese could fill.

Ryan, your eating

has a compulsive quality that's troubling,

and it could open a gateway to other obsessive behavior.

He's being normal. That's a wake-up call.

I am not grief eating.

- Yes. - Really?

Did I hear, "grief eating"?

What are you seeking refuge in, Ryan?

Muffins, meat?

Wait, snickers bars?

Chocolate? Peanuts? Sticky, crunchy, salty...

Sweet, it's hefty.

Each bite matters.

And it tastes like love.

What the hell's the matter with you right now?

Nothing.

I'm trying to help by sharing a grief experience.

Who wants to join in?

Should we tell you, or should we just call Wyatt directly?

You're not still mad that I told Wyatt about you, are you?

Yes, it's a violation.

And then you reduce us to these one-dimensional weirdos.

I mean, cat lady?

I have facets. I sing jazz. I've been to Canada.

Did you tell him about my attraction to elderly feet?

You didn't tell us that.

Seems like you're avoiding the question?

I gotta say, I totally agree with them.

I am so sorry.

What can I do to make this better?

Well, you could start...

Don't say get a pizza.

This is not about food.

Our stuff is out there. Your stuff is not.

There's an imbalance we should talk about.

Are we allowed to order pizza in here?

- No. - Ryan's right.

I would like some dirt of the Lauren variety.

We want to talk to Wyatt.

That's good!

Bring us the handsome one.

That's fair.

Terrifying, but fair. Okay, yeah.

I'm gonna bring Wyatt to next week's session,

but you guys have to promise me that you are not gonna be weird.

Come here.

- Yeah, we're gonna be weird. - Yeah.

- Yeah, so... - Yeah.

- Thanks for the ride, Ryan. - Sure.

Okay, time to go home.

Hector will probably be in a mood.

That's challenging.

Danny, I gotta ask, what's your deal, man?

You seem happy all the time,

yet objectively, your life...

- Sucks? - Yeah.

How do you cope?

When I was in the service,

I had a lot of time alone with my thoughts.

War is scary. I'm not a hero, Ryan.

So I made up a place I could go

where everything is happy and peaceful and safe.

It's a place where no one locks their doors at night.

Ladies dress up to go to the five-and-dime.

Any problems I have melt away when I walk down main street,

hear that brass band playing in the gazebo.

I call it Harborville.

Okay, let me just make sure I've got this straight,

and I really hope I don't.

You have an entire old-timey town in your brain.

Population 700. And I know 'em all.

- Is there a doctor? - Ed Abernathy.

- Schoolteacher? - The old widow preedle.

Mayor?

His honor Eustachius Q. Weatherwax.

Okay, this has become a little bit

more overwhelming than I had anticipated.

I know how it sounds, but it works.

Some people build birdhouses. I have Harborville.

Hey.

You're outta beer, Danny.

Hey, Ryan King. Big fan.

Thanks for listening.

Why are all my fans gross?

Danny?

Dan. Dan.

You're there right now, aren't you?

Salary cap or no salary cap, bottom line is...

Basketball players make too much money anyway.

Let's take some calls.

Ted in Monrovia.

I'm Ted in Monrovia. Is that what you said?

Yeah. You're on the air.

I'm sorry, I can't understand you.