Bleak Moments

- Hello. - Evening.

- Do some walking. - Walking? - Yes. - Gosh!

I'm not very much good at walking. It gets warm and cold afterwards.

- Well! - Well! - See you tomorrow. - Yes. Bye-bye. - Bye-bye.

- Would you like a Malteser, Sylvia? - I won't, thank you. - Sure?

How's Hilda today?

Super.

Have you seen what film they've got on this week?

Can you do, er... two million copies of that?

Two million?

Yeah.

I'll have to do several stencils.

No, just one. One top and two bottoms. Like a beauty queen at a freak show.

Yes.

Right.

Two-fifty-nine and a half.

Two-sixty... seventy... eighty... ninety... three pound.

- Right. - Thank you. - Thanking you very much. Thank you.

Good evening, ma'am.

- There we are, sir. Thank you. - Seeing you. - Bye-bye now. - Bye-bye.

Now...

Fifty-nine please.

Sixty? Thank you.

Fifty-nine.

And one is sixty, thank you.

There we are, dear.

Enjoy yourself.

- Hello. I thought I heard running feet. - Yes, I'm a bit late this morning.

I was... wondering if, er...

if the weather stays nice-if, er...

your sister might like to go for a walk on Sunday?

If you like.

I thought we could...

either take the Green Line out to the country, or...

just maybe go to the park.

You should like Peter. He's a teacher.

Come in.

- Hello. - Hello.

Had a good lunch?

Yes, thank you.

Where's Hilda?

Upstairs.

Good.

A little present.

Pontefract cakes.

I'll put them on the arm. Maybe she'd like them later.

I'm really very sorry we didn't... go for a walk.

The three of us.

How old is Hilda?

Twenty-nine.

- Did you have a good weekend? - Yes, thank you.

I went to the-I went to the cinema on Saturday...

on my own... and uhm, on Sunday I went to a meeting again.

It was in the room downstairs this time; it wasn't in the large room.

There weren't so many people this week.

I'm ready to become a member now.

I spoke to the lady and she thought it would be a good thing.

- The meetings don't cost so much, you see. - Jolly good.

And you can also go to the group sessions.

I'd like to go to one of those sometime.

Very good medium: she came from Belfast!

She was... funny... she sort of...

When the people... wanted to contact the people...

when the spirits wanted to contact someone in the audience...

she got involved with it, and she was...

she spoke to them-you know they speak- and she'd say to them, "Be quiet!"

She made us all laugh.

Would you like a Malteser?

Actually, I won't have one... just now.

- Sure? - Yes, thank you.

Hello.

We've come like to put the stuff in the garage like.

- Oh. Do you want the key? - Aye, yeah.

- Ta. - There you are.

Norman's told you, has he? What we're using the garage for?

- I mean, you know it's not for a car? - Yes!

We'll be sort of duplicating and printing, and Norman will be around for most of the day.

- That's okay, is it? - Yes.

The other thing-now I remember-is the money.

When would you like it?

I haven't really thought about it.

Well I'll give you, and...

Norman will give it to you later on, if that's okay?

- Fine. - Okay.

Can you get your duplicator, Norman?

Does your daddy wear glasses?

- Alan? - Yeah?

- Does your daddy wear glasses? - Yeah.

No, they don't go there. That's the ones that's been done.

What's they like?

Round?

They're black.

You know what you've done?

- All done, Alan? - Yes, thanks. - How many have you done?

- I've forgotten. - You'll forget your cat next.

Pack up now.

Hilda, will you get the brush? Pack up now, dearie.

Now, how many have you done? Fifteen, have you?

Now then. Nevermind, let's pack up.

- Is it time to go home yet? - Yes, it's quarter to four.

- Do you have sunglasses, Alan? - Yeah.

- You don't wear them. - No.

- Don't be late in the morning, will you? - No.

- Goodnight. - Goodnight.

We nearly missed the bus yesterday, Linda.

Freight train, freight train, going so fast.

I don't know what train I'm on.

Won't you tell me where he's gone?

When I die please bury me deep...

Down at the end of Baker Street.

Then I can see old Number Nine...

As she goes rolling by.

This fighter could attain a speed of 410 mph.

Cocaine's for horses and it ain't for men.

I know it'll get me but they don't say when.

Cocaine...

It's all around my brain.

Keep still: come on, keep still!

Hey, baby, won't you please come quick?

This old cocaine is makin' me sick.

Cocaine...

It's all around my brain.

Cocaine's for horses and it ain't for men.

I know it'll get me but they don't say when.

Cocaine...

It's all around my brain.

Yonder come a policeman, dressed in blue.

Don't worry, baby, pushin' ain't cool.

Cocaine...

It's all around my brain.

Yonder come my baby, dressed in white.

Hey, baby, won't you stay all night?

Cocaine...

It's all around my brain.

Hey, baby, take a whiff, it's free.

- Hello. - Hello.

I heard you playing.

I wondered if-if you would er... like to come in and have a cup of coffee?

Aye, please!

Right!

I'll put the light out.

Sit down.

Would you like something to eat with it?

No, it's alright, thanks.

I've got... five nuts here.

Four nuts... now. Would you like four nuts?

Biscuits?

Well, I'll put them through.

- Do you take sugar? - Aye, yeah: two please.

Down to three.

- Two. - Ta.

- I've left you the biggest one there. - Oh, ta.

Thanks.

- Do you smoke? - Please.

Ta.

Ta.

- I've got ink on my hands. - They're a bit grubby, aren't they?

I'm the duplicator.

Who's actually doing the writing for this magazine?

Well...

The idea like, you know, is that...

anyone can write for it, you know, but... for this one like...

well... Malc, he's- he's editing it like, and erm...

other people in the house are, you know, writing other stuff, but, er...

well, for the next one like... anyone can write what they want.

- What about you? - No... I'm just duplicating like.

Talcum powder.

I've just been bathing my sister.

Would you...

Would you like to earn your living by playing your guitar and singing?

I don't know.

Last job I had like were...

were in this toy factory.

But it weren't much good.

We had-we had like to put-put all this doll's house furniture in boxes.

It were a bit of a waste of time like.

- I jacked it in. - Where was that? - That were in, er, in Doncaster.

Thing is that...

it's easy enough like, you know, to...

well to-to know what it is you don't want to do.

I mean, you know, if you've- if you've got a job like, and...

well it's-it's no good...

you know it's-you know when it's no good, so you...

you know, you know you don't do it, but... it's-well it's not...

you know-it's not so easy to know what it is you-you really do want to do.

What-what do you do like?

I'm the president of Venezuela.

Well, what does your husband do, then?

I'm not married, actually.

You know before... when I said like... I come from Doncaster.

Well, I don't really... I come from Scunthorpe like.

Only like when-when people say, "Where d'you come from?" and...

and you say "Scunthorpe"... they laugh like.

So I always say I come from Doncaster instead.

I'm not actually the president of Venezuela.

I gave it up to be a secretary.

For my sins.

What-what would you like to do?

You know, if you could do what you wanted like?

I don't know. I don't know at all... really.