The League

- What do you think, guys? - There it is!

Yeah, it's great.

And the airbrushing job's awesome.

It's not airbrushed.

Well, now, your breasts are way fuller in the ad than in real life.

Those aren't airbrushed, Taco, those are the girls.

It could be a push-up bra, but based on lift not only up but out, I doubt it.

And the mole on your left breast is gone.

Unless it's closer to the areola than I... Okay.

That's... that's enough.

Inappropriate.

What if she's in a terrible accident one day, and someone

has to tell them how to put her titties back together?

What?

I'd do the same for you.

I have a picture of your penis.

Um, excuse me?

I don't want you taking any more dick pics of me.

You understand me?

Kevin!

Does everyone have a dick pic of me?

Look at this!

What is he doing?

There's so many benches.

Why is he picking my bench?

Well, he could have chosen any bench, and he chose yours.

He's right up in those titties.

Yeah.

Mmm... Whoa, he is motorboating those fakies.

Oh, God.

This season already sucks.

This is not good on my stomach and my bowels, all right?

Oh, come on.

I can't talk to Ruxin about the draft order, I can't talk to

Andre about the porno... Guys.

Oh, hello, gentlemen.

Hey, there.

Hey.

I bring wonderful news to fill your pathetic social calendars.

You're going to be receiving an Evite shortly to a Sukkot party at my house.

A what kind of party?

Coat party?

Sukkot.

It's the Jewish harvest festival.

We all hang out in this tent thing in my yard.

It's like a Jewish Bonnaroo?

Yeah, minus the patcholi and underlying sadness.

All right, so... since when does Sophia allow you to celebrate Judaism in your

house?

No, no, no.

Forget Sophia.

Since when do you allow Judaism in your own house?

Uh, trying to get Baby Geoffrey in to a Jewish preschool, and I have to invite

Mrs. Klein over, who runs the school, to make a good impression.

But just be aware... don't park in the driveway, because there's

a pothole right in front of it that will scrape the tits right off of your car.

Why don't you just call the city and have them fix it?

I've called the city 100 times, but they do not care

about the plight of the upper- middle-class white suburban male at all.

Yeah, that's because they spend all their time cleaning grfiti off walls in my

neighborhood.

That's a city ordinance.

The city has to clean up any dangerous or racially insensitive material ASAP.

There's nothing racially insensitive about a dragon with a chainsaw penis.

Of course there isn't.

Hello!

Hey, babe.

Oh... Oh, it's getting quiet.

The walk-away.

Here we go.

You have to be very specific.

That aisle is very confusing to me.

Well, is "pearl" a

What is it?

Oh.

We talking lady stuff?

Okay, bye, all right, bye.

Thank you.

Very much.

Jenny's got her period, so it's probably a joy for me at home,

and I have to stop and get tampons.

I thought at this point, after all the time you spend

together, you'd be on the same cycle.

We do not get our periods at the same time.

Oh, no wait, you and Pete... No, I... Oh, God.

Forget it.

That never gets old for you, does it?

Does a man ever tired of looking at the sunrise...

when he's balls-deep in Kevin?

That's impressive.

How'd you get them out here so fast?

What do I owe the pleasure, Pete?

Well, I got a trade proposition for you.

Dwayne Bowe for Owen Daniels.

More than fair trade.

Helps everybody.

Would you like to hear my counteroffer?

Owen Daniels for LeSean McCoy and Tolbert.

Really?

Do, do you really think that's going to work?

It's like you trolling around the bar looking for a hand jibber.

Every once in a while, someone says yes.

Were you guys taking trades?

Yeah.

How's the sukkah coming along?

Oh, it's coming along great, man.

Where did you get that wood?

Don't ask.

Look, I'm sensing that there could be like a multi-team trade happening here.

Mm-hmm.

But we're one man short.

That man is Andre.

Yeah.

Well, the problem with Andre is, he won't trade with us unless we

go to his apartment.

Where we shot a porno film.

Oh.

Exactly.

I was in the room.

There was so much semen.

Ugh.

I don't want to go.

Oh, but I need a running back!

Okay.

I will go, but I'm going to go change my clothes and then throw

them in the trash afterwards.

What trash can?

Gentlemen, welcome.

Come on in.

S'up?

Come on, sit down, take a load off.

You know, I think better on my feet, I'm good, thank you.

My knees don't work.

All right, all right.

Your loss.

And I am now open for any and all... Oh, ooh, boy.

Five-second rule, right?

Gross.

So what's the uh, the trade proposal?

It's a four-way trade, basically.

It would involve the four of us.

It could help everybody's teams out.

No.

I don't trust it.

Look, Taco's in.

I'm in.

Even Ruxin's in.

I'm not... I mean, come on, you're not going to make me beg on you, are you?

Don't touch me, don't touch me!

Calm down, all right?

I know that you live on a futon, but just because it's a piece of

art doesn't mean we can't sit on it.

I mean, hell, I sleep on this thing.

That's probably drool over here.

Ugh.

Not drool.

Yeah, gotta get that cleaned... .h Look at this.

You left your ring here, Ruxin.

Uh-uh, not mine.

What do you mean, it's not your ring?

It says "Ruxin" right on it.

Yeah, it says Ruxin, right?

That's definitely your ring.

Yeah, take it back.

No, gross.

Take it.

Kiss the ring.

Yeah, I think you should go ahead.

Ah!

There you go, take the ring.

So what's up with the Sacko porno?

I got a fax from Dirty Randy.

It's almost done.

A fax?

How lovely.

Oh, God.

What?

Evite from Ruxin.

Here we go.

Oh, for that Sukkot thing?

Sukkot?

I don't know what this thing is.

Oh, I have an idea how to roll out the porno.

You know those video billboards on Michigan Avenue?

Mm-hmm.

We can play a scene-by-scene ou're driv... Oh, my God.

What?

Google Earth.

Getting closer, getting closer.

And there he is!

Caught on Google Maps.

Oh.

Wow.

Ruxin.

You tag, Ruxin?

Wow, we have more in common than I thought.

Probably not even me.

I wish we could get closer somehow.

Uh-oh!

Oh... Smug face and all, there he is.