Awkward.

Hey, everybody.

I'm beau mirchoff, and I play matty mckibben.

- Jenna lip-dip. Heyo!

Oh.

- I'm molly tarlov, otherwise known as sadie.

You're welcome.

- I'm jillian rose reed, aka tamara.

- I am forever a different person.

Europeans are amaze-balls,

As in, stress the "balls,"

'cause that's what they smell like.

- And I'm brett davern, jake rosati.

Talk dirty to me, baby.

- And this is awkward's most awkward moments.

So far every season of awkward

Has been jam-packed with especially awkward moments,

And today, we're gonna revisit them all.

- From the steamiest make-outs with the hottest hunks

To your favorite tamara-isms, we got 'em.

- We'll also take a peek at some red-hot romances,

Bromances, and best wisdom--

Or something like that--

From our favorite vice principal/guidance counselor,

Aka vpgc at palos hills high.

- Did someone say they needed a vpgc?

- Wow. Desi lydic, guys.

You're good.

And you're in luck,

Because I am the vpgc.

- So hang with us, as we look back

At the funniest, sexiest,

Most emotional, most embarrassing,

And of course, most awkward moments from awkward.

- Matty mckibben wanted me, a nobody,

To meet him in the utility closet.

You are the , j-town.

But nobody can know that I like you.

- "jenna, you could disappear and no one would notice."

A friend?

"sometimes being a teenager makes you want to die."

Ah!

I didn't try to kill myself.

Figure out what you want, matty,

Because I'm tired of being your secret.

- Anyone would be lucky to be with you.

Who'd you come with?

- There was a girl, but I messed it up.

You want another chance?

I won't screw up again.

I came with jake.

But you can stay with me.

I chose jake,

And now we can't be alone

Without matty tagging along

Trying to tempt me.

The whole situation is weird.

Nice job, mckibben.

What?

- You are totally sabotaging them.

- I can't believe your dad gave you condoms.

Yeah, it's kind of his thing.

He gave them to the last guy I dated too.

If it makes you feel any better, I was in love,

You know, when I used them.

- That doesn't make me feel any better.

Ask matty.

He had a piece of your hamilton pie long before you did.

- Okay, mckibben, time to come clean.

Please don't do this.

I know you're together now.

It's cool.

- I finally got what I really wanted.

But I wasn't sure it was what I needed.

Wake up, jenna.

This is your junior year,

And it is time to evolve, change.

- Something is definitely off in my relationship.

You need the loving,

But you want to bring back the mystery.

I feel you.

Jenna!

So your dad called my parents

And said we're having sex.

- My mom was right about one thing.

You guys are different kinds of people.

Can I crash here for the night?

I'm not pregnant.

Totally thought I was, but I'm not.

So what did I miss?

Your girlfriend telling me

That she's not pregnant.

She just thought she was.

- You had your accident the same day we slept together.

How do you think that with my head?

You didn't even try to explain it to me.

- You said you were never embarrassed of me.

I lied.

- What do you think about the metamorphosis?

Pretty chic, huh?

Love is a game-changer.

- I'm a cheerleader!

- You're throwing a party with the julies?

Yes, I replaced sadie.

I really need to get on the pill.

Are you guys having sex?

Not yet, but soon.

And then jakara will finally have something over jakenna.

Oh, my god. We're gonna do it.

In minutes, I'm not gonna be a virgin anymore.

I'm broke, okay?

My parents lost all their money,

And if anyone finds out,

I might have to go to another school.

- Everyone's talking about how your parents are broke.

Ah!

You can't help us anymore,

'cause a bitch without money is just a bitch.

- And we don't need any help in that department.

- You can't leave with the horseshoe

Unless you pony up your phone number.

- Happy? - Sometimes.

The ritalin helps.

You're welcome.

I learned mandarin.

You finally speak chinese?

Ixnay on the chinese-ay.

Mafia is everywhere,

And they can't know what I know.

Who the hell is henry?

My beard.

I've been asian-bitching becca for months.

I was seeing fred on the low.

Wha! Jeez! Where did you come from?

Your beard has been shaved.

- I'm going to take that down.

Good-bye, kitty.

Does that mean you're head of the mafia?

I love asians.

- Everything that once was simple was now complicated.

So who is the guy?

- Collin? He's in my class.

Oh.

Is that all? - It's no big deal.

He has a girlfriend.

And you have a boyfriend.

Who knew you were funny?

Me.

I'm worried this collin thing

Might be more than just a fantasy.

I think I might have actual feelings for him.

You're 16.

If there's ever a time to be selfish, it's now.

Hey.

- I can't believe we're still standing

After that drama coaster.

Whoo.

- Well, high school, it's definitely all about

Ups and downs,

Especially when it comes to love.

You never know what to expect.

But I have to say, brett,

Our boo-loving skills on the show

Are pretty impressive.

- Well, you know, I never thought about it,

Because my romance meter is always set to full blast.

Ha-ha!

But you're right, beau.

Oh, we are good at it.

It's true.

You guys are basically like the ryan goslings of palos hill.

- Hey, girl. - Hey, girl.

- Let's watch their love sparks fly

In some of the most romance-ifanced scenes

From awkward.

- We've decided not to let a girl come between us.

- I understand. - So you need to choose.

Him...

Or me.

- Our whole lives have been building up to this moment.

I met you, and then you met matty,

And then you met jake,

And then you cheated on jake with matty,

And then I started dating jake,

And now you're with matty,

And here we are.

Both: Je t'aime.

I love you so much.

I just want to be as close as two people can possibly be.

- You. Come here.

Ah.

I think I'm gonna head out.

Bye.

- Yeah, I'll call you later, man.

I love your full lips.

And your full face.

And your flat--

Watch it.

Go get 'em, sugar booger.

I will, my tiny tiger.

- And I-- - and you say nothing.