Body Bags

Ah, good evening.

I was just taking a little break.

It's been a busy night.

Lots of new arrivals.

I call them the arriving departed.

Ahh! Well, back to work.

Eh, what the hell. One more for the road.

Just a dash. Adds a little spine.

Long life.

Ohh, better!

Ahh, the doctor will see you now.

Hmm.

Uhh, ugly!

Man, are you ugly.

Well, we all know it isn't what a person looks like.

It's what's inside that counts.

Mmm.

Ehh, death by natural causes.

Natural causes, natural causes.

More natural causes. I hate natural causes!

Give me a big old stab wound to poke around in, then I'm happy.

Ahh, here we are.

Body bags.

See, if it's murder or suicide or a nasty accident,

they put 'em in these bags.

This one was found on a stretch of lonely highway,

miles from the nearest town on a pitch-black night.

Also in the news, another gruesome murder in Haddonfield today.

The body of a young woman was discovered buried

in the bottom of a trash bin behind a shopping mall.

Police Chief, Ardith Robinson of the Haddonfield PD

gave a statement to reporters this afternoon

after the discovery of"...

Police believe the woman to be

another victim of a serial killer responsible for a series

of ritualized slayings in the southland.

The body of the woman was found by hikers--

I'd be scared shitless working all alone in a place like this.

Eh, I can take care of myself.

Besides, you're the one who has to drive back to an empty apartment.

- Ooooh. - Thanks a lot.

You don't mind picking me up in the morning?

- What time? - Seven.

Ooh.

This'll be the last time I ask you for a ride, I promise.

They said my car will be out of the shop by tomorrow.

I'll buy breakfast.

Deal.

See ya.

Can I help ya?

I'm Anne.

Okay.

The new girl.

Oh, yeah, right, come on in.

- Hi. - Hey.

- Sorry I'm late. - No biggie.

Oh, wow, this is almost identical to the gas station I worked last month,

except that was a little bit smaller.

Well, why don't I give you the, uh, the grand tour.

Uh, that's the cash register.

You just punch in the pump number and amount, right?

Yeah, you got it. That's the credit card machine.

No sweat.

And listen, when you get their, uh, signatures,

make sure you get the license plate number, all right?

- Right. - It's important.

Um, the TV gets maybe three channels.

Actually, I'll probably just do some studying.

Um, the cigarette prices are posted outside.

- Saw it. - Okay, good.

Is that the bathroom?

Well, actually, we, uh, prefer to call that the employee's lounge.

Yeah, great.

Let's see-- oh, oh, do I ring out the register

when the morning shift comes in?

Nah, just, you know, uh, he'll take care of that.

Why don't you just collect the cash and make change.

- Okay. - Yep-- oh, you know what?

This door locks automatically if you leave the booth.

- So, uh-- - Keys?

Right, keys, yeah, um--

God, I don't know where the hell I left them.

Yeah, here they are.

The round one, um, that's for the booth

and the square one works everything else, okay?

Got it.

- Public restrooms. - Yeah.

Um... yeah, I guess that's about it.

You know, I feel a little bit guilty.

Leaving you out here all by yourself.

- Eh, I'll be okay. - Did you hear the news tonight?

- Yeah, it's horrible. - Yeah.

- Hmm. - Hey, you know what?

If you got a problem,

why don't you, um, just give me a call, okay?

Hey, thank you.

- Sure, no problem. - Will do.

Okay.

Uh, that's it, then.

I'm outta here. Have a good night.

- See ya later. - You got it.

Pack of Coronados.

Two seventy-five.

ls there anything else?

Uh, what you readin'?

It's for school.

A college girl, huh?

Yeah, well, I never got to go to college myself, you know?

Yeah, I got some bourbon out in the car.

Maybe I can get you to come out of that booth.

Maybe I'll see ya around.

Okay.

Okay.

Hi, I need to fill her up. Super unleaded.

- Number 12? - Uh, yeah.

Haven't seen you around here before.

It's my first night-- huh.

Uh, signature and license, please.

Are you from Haddonfield?

Born and raised.

Thanks.

What are you studying?

Um, psychology. Final exams next week.

Gotta pull my average up.

- You go to the university? - Uh-huh.

Well, do you ever feel like, uh, kicking back?

You know, just hanging out someplace after class?

- Sometimes. - Well, you gotta try the Oak Lounge.

It's, uh, down Seventh Street by the freeway.

They got a really good band there on weekends.

Hey, maybe if I run into you some time, I'll play you a game of pool.

I'm no good at pool.

All the better.

Well, see ya.

Bye.

Ooh.

Hey, you forgot your card! Hey!

Shit.

Ooh! Great.

Hey.

I need the key to the restroom.

I really have to go to the restroom.

Oh, uh... the key's in the booth.

I have to get the other set.

Uh, I'll be right back.

Shit.

Ugh, thank God!

Great.

Oh, you pump, I gotta go to the john.

I'm gonna take care of this.

Whoo-hoo, honey, hiya, sweetheart!

Listen, give me, uh, oh, $20.

Of that superduper irregular

on, uh, pump number niner there, okay?

You're a little glum tonight, hon, what's wrong?

You oughtta be out partyin'.

Pretty little thing like you, huh?

Say, uh, I need a key to get in that little boy's room there?

Uh, you do.

Listen, could you do me a favor?

Sure, name it.

There's a man, he's in the men's restroom.

- He's a little weird. - Weirdo, huh?

Yeah, I don't know-- I was wondering,

could you take a look and see what he's doing?

You got that.

Yoo-hoo! There's nothing coming out.

What's the problem?

Oh, oh, there's nothing coming out.

- You have to lift the lever. - Oh.

No. the lever-- the lever on the pump.

Never mind, I'll do it.

So sorry to bother you.

I just usually go to the full serve.

Oh.

Oh, thanks.

Guy is sleepin' in there.

He's all curled up around the toilet.

I had to stand back and aim over his head.

Shame on you.

When you gotta go, you gotta go.

I wouldn't worry about it, hon.

He's fast asleep. The guy's a bum.

Let him sleep it off.

Did you get the restroom key?

Oh, I left it hangin' in the door.

Come on, baby, let's go, I'm cold.

See ya around, doll face.

Get in there, get in there, arrrh!

God.

Shit!

I can do this.

Come on, come on...

Hi.

This is Bill.

I can't come to the phone right now.

So, maybe you could just leave a message.

See, I got a sore throat.

Be better if you could call back.

If you wanna leave a message, just wait for the beep.