Young & Hungry

Oh my God, is this really happening?

Mm-hmm. It is. It is happening.

And it's real. I'm not dreaming?

Here, pinch me.

It's not a dream!

Do you know how long I've waited for this?

A year and three months, roughly.

Wait, what if something goes wrong?

I mean, every time we've been close to getting together,

-something happens. -Not this time.

Well, what's different this time?

Oh. That.

You know, I could stay here with you all day.

-I gotta go. -What?

Well, don't get me wrong, Josh. I'm really into this,

but I'm also really into that.

That thing-- the food truck.

Oh, why did I help you with your dream?

Oh, it's not just that.

I mean, Jake was really cool with you and me,

but leaving him with the food truck to cook on his own?

I mean, there's only so much coolness a man can give.

You're right. You should definitely stay.

But how about I find us a beautiful hotel

so when you're done with that,

we can start this?

-Oh, I love that idea. -You know what I love?

-Making out with me? -It's like we share a brain.

Okay, there you go. Enjoy.

Wow, people are loving our mushroom popovers.

Yeah, till they wait an hour and don't feel anything.

Either way, we are killing it.

Best team ever.

Uh, you know, professionally, of course.

Jake, I am sorry. I am so, so sorry.

Gabi, for the 10th time,

I swear I'm good with you and Josh.

You're amazing.

She's right. That was amazing.

What do you mean?

Your performance of "guy who's totally cool

having just been dumped."

Sofia, it wasn't an act.

I really am cool with Gabi and Josh.

Yeah, and I'm totally cool with Ruben dumping me again.

Listen, it's just us.

Tell me you haven't been thinking about

cutting the brakes on Josh's car

and having him accidentally veer off the road

to run over Ruben.

What? No!

You were just dumped. How can you be so nice?

I feel happy that other people are happy.

Sofia, I lived with monks in Nepal for a year.

"My religion is kindness." So says the Dalai Lama.

Yeah? Well, my religion is, you cut me, I cut you deeper.

So says the Li'l SoSo.

Okay, who's ready to salvage our honeymoon

with a "staycation" at the Four Seasons?

Me! I am!

I love my new husband.

That's your suitcase?

I thought you used a sardine can like Stuart Little.

Oh! That wasn't good.

Yoyo, is your back okay?

Oh, it's just a little pinch. I'll be fine.

Ah!

Let me help.

My cousin's a chiropractor.

He taught me a little trick.

Ah! Oh my damn!

I think that's my T7!

Oh! There went my L5!

I'm so sorry.

No wonder my cousin now works at Urban Outfitters.

If we leave now,

we can catch the complementary mimosa brunch. Let's go!

-What? -What?

Our friend has just been hurt,

and by my own hands. We can't just leave her.

Of course we can.

She's the one who can't walk, not us.

-Come on. -Are you serious?

Your friend's in need and you just want to abandon her

like garbage on the side of the road?

Whoa, whoa, whoa, you've gone too far.

She is not my friend.

Aw, sweet tent!

Ain't she a beaut?

Is that for you and Gabi tonight?

Oh, this tent?

Oh, it's not just for me and Gabi.

Anyone can use it, really. It's a necessities one.

There's-- look, you know, all the hotels in Coachella--

Josh, I'm cool with you and Gabi.

Really, man? Are you sure?

Because, Jake, I would feel terrible if there were any--

There isn't. Josh, it's all good.

We're good.

Good.

Something else on your mind?

No! No, I mean, I'm good, man.

It's just... I'm kind of freaking out about tonight.

What's the problem?

I mean, I'm usually fine with this kind of stuff.

This "kind of stuff," meaning being with a woman?

Well, not just any woman. It's Gabi.

Jake, I've never felt like this about anyone.

And we've been so close so many times,

I don't want to blow it.

Oh. Now I get it.

Performance anxiety.

Yes! Wait, what?

I mean, the last thing you need

is a premature "e-Josh-ulation."

No!

No, no, no. That's not what I'm talking about.

Okay. So what are you talking about then?

The relationship stuff.

The sex stuff? Not the sex stuff!

I'm not talking about the sex stuff.

There'll be no problem with sex stuff.

But if I suddenly thought it could be a problem,

what were you going to say?

Oh, just in situations where you're afraid

you'll finish before you get started,

there is a numbing spray that you could just put on down there--

Okay!

No. Thank you, but not in a million years

would I ever need something like that.

But if I suddenly thought I would need it,

where would I buy it?

My date with Josh is going to be romantic and magical.

"Romantagical."

Well, I'm very excited for you

even though I am bummed and depressed--

"bumpressed."

So what are you going to wear on this "romantagical" evening?

This.

Oh, plus my red hamburger print undies

that say "cute buns" on the back.

Oh.

Why "oh"?

You didn't bring anything sexier?

Sofia, Josh and I are starting a relationship.

I think we go a little bit deeper

than caring about what we wear.

Oh, that being said, I showered a tweezed. "Shweezed."

Mmm. Well, you know what? I think you're right.

Josh doesn't care if your undies match because you're a match.

Right? I mean, I could probably wear a poncho and he wouldn't care.

You probably could.

But don't!

"Numb-Numb.

"De-sensitizing spray for men.

Works within minutes, lasts four to six hours."

Hours are good.

One more for good luck.

Ooh, this is good.

Tingly.

-Knock knock! -Hey, beautiful.

-Hi. -Mwah! Ta-dah!

Oh my God, I love it! This is incredible.

I actually have a bit of a lesser surprise for you too.

Oh, amazing. Open it.

Gabi, hey, I know a tent isn't every girl's dream,

but... you're not every girl.

Aw! And you're not every guy.

Tonight is going to be so... fun.

Oh my God!

Are you okay?

Fine. Didn't feel a thing.

Mmm.

Nothing.

Good, because I don't want anything to ruin this night.

Uh-oh.

Uh-oh, what?

Uh-oh, I just don't want you to think

that we're moving too fast, you know?

'Cause if you want me to slow it down, I totally get it.

I'm fine, but I love that you're so sensitive.

Actually, I'm not.

May our feelings continue to grow.

God willing.

Can you believe that we're finally together?

No, I can't feel it at all--

believe it at all.

So what do you want to do now?

You know what I want to do?

-What? -Talk.

Let's talk for about four to six hours.

Gabi? Is that you?

Yep.

Tell me everything that happened last night!

Well, we talked.

-Uh-huh? -And we cuddled.

Gabi? You left out the sex part.

Yeah, so did he!

What?

There was no sex part.