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We have with us from the Ministry of Information

Deputy Minister, Eugene Helpmann.

Good evening, David.

What do you believe is behind this recent increase in terrorist bombings?

Bad sportsmanship.

A ruthless minority of people

seems to have forgotten certain good old-fashioned virtues.

They just can't stand seeing the other fellow win.

If these people would just play the game

they'd get a lot more out of life.

Nevertheless, Mr. Helpmann, there are those who maintain

that the Ministry of Information has become too large and unwieldy.

In free society, information is the name of the game.

You can't win the game if you're a man short.

The cost of it all, seven percent of the gross national product.

I understand this concern on behalf of the taxpayers.

People want value for money. That is why we always insist

on the principle of Information Retrieval Charges.

It's absolutely right and fair

that those found guilty should pay for their periods of detention

and for the information retrieval procedures used in their interrogation.

Do you believe that the government is winning against terrorists?

Oh, yes.

We're fielding all their strokes, running all of them out

and pretty consistently knocking them for six.

I'd say they're nearly out of the game.

Mr. Helpmann, the bombing campaign is now in its 13th year.

Beginner's luck.

Thank you very much, Deputy Minister.

Thank you, David. And a very merry Christmas to you all.

"Scrooge was better than his word.

"He did it all, and infinitely more.

"And to Tiny Tim, who did not die

"he became a second father.

"He became as good a friend, in the good old world.

"And so, as Tiny Tim observed

"God bless us, everyone."

Are you boys giving me the runaround?

Now, I have to say, "Hey, hey."

Don't throw that. That's only for long distance.

- I'm sorry, we haven't got any vacancies. - No vacancies?

We've got plenty of rooms.

Who's there?

Who is that?

Father Christmas can't come if we haven't got a chimney.

You'll see.

"I hereby inform you, under powers entrusted to me

"under Section 47, Paragraph 7 of Council Order Number 438476

"that Mr. Buttle, Archibald, residing in 412 North Tower, Shangri-La Towers

"is invited to assist the Ministry of Information with inquiries.

"And that he is liable to financial obligations as specified in

"Council Order RB/CZ/907/X."

Sign here, please.

Where are you taking him?

There.

Thank you.

Same again, please.

Press harder this time. Good.

What is this all about?

That is your receipt for your husband. Thank you.

This is my receipt for your receipt.

Mrs. Buttle, are you okay?

We're Department of Works! Department of Works up here.

- Careful with those bloody things. - Sure.

Don't take any notice of them.

Don't touch me! Why don't you just get out of here.

Don't you worry. We'll have everything shipshape in a jiffy.

Nothing to worry about.

It's Tuttle downstairs who can worry.

Tuttle? His name's Buttle. There must be some mistake.

Mistake? We don't make mistakes.

Bloody typical. They've gone back to metric without telling us.

Mrs. Buttle, are you all right?

Yes...

Buttle.

Buttle, Archibald.

Oh, shit!

Mister...

Mr. Lowry, would you step in here, please.

Has anybody seen Lowry?

Has anybody seen

Sam Lowry?

Sam.

Hello? Sam. Where are you?

- Hello? - It's 11:00.

- What? - It's 11:00.

Mr. Kurtzmann.

You're up late.

Is it?

- The electrics here are up the spout. - Yeah, I know.

- Yours, too? - Yes.

I'll be there as soon as I can. Yes, thanks. 'Bye.

This is not the only statue.

What's this gun for?

This one, Sister, is a nine millimeter submachine gun

used for close-quarter combat fighting. Very effective weapon.

Would you like to see it?

Sam!

Jack!

Long time no see.

What are you doing here?

Didn't expect to see you slumming it in Records.

- What's the problem? - Problem? No problem.

Everything's fine. Marvelous.

Alison's in great shape, kids are fine. I'm on Security Level 5

so Mr. Helpmann relies on me more and more. It's been a great year.

You sound worried.

Worried? Me? If I'm worried about anyone, Sam, it's you.

Sam, whatever happened to you?

Records.

Sam?

Jack, it's great to see you. I'm going to be late.

Sam, let a friend tell you your life is going wrong.

Records is a dead-end department. No security that's worth a damn.

- It's impossible to get noticed. - I know. Wonderful.

Marvelous. Perfect.

See you, Jack. Give my regards to Alison and the twins.

- Triplets. - Triplets?

God, how time flies.

A very clear delineation of picture, is it not? Mobile.

Next!

I want to report a wrongful arrest.

You want Information Adjustments. Different department.

I've been to Information Adjustments. They sent me here.

They said you have a form I need to fill out.

- Have you got an arrest receipt? - Yeah.

Is it stamped?

Stamped?

No, there's no stamp on it, you see.

I can't let you have the form until this is stamped.

Where do I get it stamped?

Information Adjustments.

It's nothing.

It keeps picking up old films. That can't be right, can it?

Perhaps the machine's on the blink.

No, it's not the machine.

There's a mismatch on the personnel code numbers.

Tuttle should've had £31.06 debited against his account, not Buttle.

- My God, a mistake! - At least it's not ours.

Isn't it? Whose is it?

- Information Retrieval. - Good.

Expediting has put in for electrical procedures in respect of

Buttle, Archibald, shoe-repair operative.

But Security has invoiced Admin. for Tuttle, Archibald, heating engineer.

What a relief. Well, finish your tea, Sam.

Thanks.

I don't know what I'd do if you ever got promoted.

- God, don't worry about that. - But if they did promote you.

I've told you before. I'd turn it down.

- Would you, really? - Really.

You've been promoted.

It's your mother, isn't it? Pulling strings again.

Sam, it's time for you to grow up and accept responsibility.

Your poor father would be appalled at your lack of promotion.

Mother, I just wish you would stop interfering.

I don't want promotion. I'm happy where I am.

No, you're not. Jack Lint is a lesson to you.

He doesn't have your brains, but he's got the ambition.

You haven't got the ambition. Luckily, you've got me and the Deputy Minister.

Mr. Helpmann was very close to your father.

Now please, Mrs. Lowry. Don't get upset.

Mr. Lowry, please wait in the reception. You're giving her wrinkles.

- You see? - God!

Just try and relax, Mrs. Lowry.

I'll make you 20 years younger.

Dr. Jaffe, you are a genius.

Would you like to be Surgeon General?

I know simply everybody.

They won't know you when I've finished with you.

First,

we remove the excess derma.

Now the flaccid tissues under the eyes and forehead.

Now, I lift

the wrinkles and the worry lines

right up into the wig, into the hairline.

Now the template.

Now, a bit of sticky. Comme ça!

Already she's twice as beautiful as she was before.

Voilà!

Mr. Helpmann was very close to your poor father.

He was close to me. He still is.

He'll take you under his wing when you get to Information Retrieval.

You'll like it there.

You're not listening to me, Mother.

What the hell is this, lady?

It's a present for my son. Really!

I hope you like it. It's very exclusive.

What on Earth is it?

Something for an executive.

Madam Lowry! You look exquisite today. Merry Christmas.