Ephraim's Rescue

You're too late...

She died two hours ago.

The Relief Society sisters are preparing her for burial.

Brother Johnson.

Your wife would like to talk to you.

My darling!

I had the most wonderful dream.

There was a man with white hair and a full white beard

sitting here beside my bed.

He told me that I would bear and raise seven daughters.

The man also said

there would be a time in life when they would all stand together

and be a great joy to me.

Being worthy when your opportunity arrives

is a lesson it took me years to learn.

It is, for me, what a good life is all about.

But as a boy, becoming a good man was the furthest thing from my mind.

It wasn't the first time I'd put Lindy up wet,

but as it was Sunday, Pa couldn't take it to me 'til the Sabbath had passed.

They went off to church and that gave me time

to make the decision to strike off on my own...

I've always loved the Sabbath.

I determined to show my parents

I could sort out what this life is all about

and grow up to become a good man.

I worked my way around parts of the country for a time,

learned what they knew, then found myself

in the United States Navy on the USS Columbia!

Three years later

I was back where I began, at the port of Boston.

May have broke your china on that one, eh?

- Get out a here. - Be quick about it, Eph!

What!?

You lookin' for a bustin', mister?

That's quite a temper you've developed there.

Yeah, so?

Where is your home?

Ohio. Who's asking?

How long since you've been there?

Three years. Now, who's asking?

Three years is a long time from those you cherish.

Yeah. Well, I hope nobody's waiting for me at the window

'cause I'm going to town, changing ships and off for another three years.

May I offer to watch your belongings in your absence?

Now why would I ever...?

Yes, I'd be obliged, sir.

Thank you kindly.

Eph, quit your dawdling!

Time's a wastin'! We got good times to be had tonight!

Ephraim? What kind of name is Ephraim, anyway?

I haven't heard a name that peculiar since those, huh...

those New Guinea blokes, eh?

Strange birds they were.

As quickly as he had arrived,

the Man in the Grey Tweed Suit was gone.

A new thought entered my head.

I made the decision to forgo the Navy and return home.

Now, in my later years, I see more clearly.

Though as a boy I had stayed close to God,

as a sailor I was drifting further and further away...

It was time to return and make amends with my parents.

Acorn, that's a good boy.

Good boy.

I believe you took a wrong turn, neighbor.

Mother?

It's Eph!

Ephraim! Ephraim!

My boy!

Where was he buried?

Near the south oak.

Did he have an ailment? What did he die of?

He was old, Ephraim. He was 52.

During those years at sea, I...

I wanted to make you and father proud.

Now I'll never know...

If you have any regrets, son, let them be for your brother Sidney.

Sid...

Where is Sidney?

He's been led away by the terrible Mormons.

Mormons?

They have cast a spell upon him.

Where is he?

A-way out west, almost to the ocean, in Illinois.

Well, then I will go and free him.

Yes, go... as soon as you are able.

Saving Sidney was what my mother wanted...

and seemed to be an opportunity to show her

I could do something good.

Looking back, it seems like everything that happened in my life

was a lesson God wanted me to learn.

Like the morning a visitor stopped by to teach me about keeping my head.

Some days, lessons come one after another.

After taking the right path, a strange despair fell upon me,

and I was overpowered by a stupor of thought.

What's the matter with me, Acorn? I am a blathering idiot...

Must've taken a wrong path.

Something is amiss.

I do not know what to do.

Blessed Father, it's been a long time since I've done this.

For the first time in years, I prayed.

Seems since I was a boy, the Lord was always willing

to keep in touch with me if I was willing to keep in touch with Him.

And though I'd been absent without leave,

the Lord was quick to whisper what I should be doing.

I felt impressed to get on back home.

Soon as I got there, I realized why.

Sidney!

Brother!

Sidney had been told in a dream he needed to go home.

Son, I want you to do us both a favor.

I want you to call on Pastor Reed and Pastor Robbins.

Invite them here Thursday next.

Just being sociable?

You and Sidney are home now.

I want no more of this Mormon rubbish.

They're good, Christian men. They'll bring a Christlike message.

- A prophet in our day?! - Prophets are a thing of the past!

Do you believe that God is among us?

Most certainly!

"Surely the Lord God would do nothing

but He revealeth his secret unto his servants prophets."

Amos 3:7.

Well, if God did speak to man, surely he would come to learned men such as us!

We.

What?

Proper English is we: "He would come to learned men such as we."

In any case...

why would God reveal His word to a young boy?!

Yes! Why would the Lord speak to a young boy,

like He did Samuel?!

1st Samuel 3:4.

Gentlemen, it is my earnest testimony given to me

by the spirit that Joseph Smith is indeed a prophet of God.

And it is my testimony that Joe Smith is a liar and a thief!

And to believe his stories sets you among the weakest of morons!

And any man who would follow him would rob his own mother!

Enough! You have crossed a line, and I will hear no more!

Leave our home before I...

- Go, go, go! - Get out!

You're not welcome in Sunday School anymore!

And forget about the socials!

Get outta here!

And as a kid, I hated your Sunday School class!

I am sorry, Mother...

But no one can slander my brother while I am here.

They forgot their hat!

Now why would he come to a young boy?

No, he would come to learned men such as us, such as us, yup, yup.

Eph, you need to know that...

what I testified of to them is true.

God has come again to Earth and angels minister to men.

I myself was about to die from a serious rupture,

but through the laying on of hands, I was healed.

You were healed?

The way Christ healed others?

Here, this is the Book of Mormon.

That very night, I chose to cast my lot with Sidney and the Mormons...

and another adventure was about to begin.

I should have known the moment you returned.

What?

You always have been and always will be trouble!

You abandoned us once and you'll leave us again.

Mother, I'm just...

You bring only shame to your father and embarrassment to me.

Because I seek to do what's right?

No! Because you only think of your precious self!

It's not within you to become a good man.

Once again, in my mother's eyes, I had failed to be good.

So we did as she asked and bid farewell...

then headed out for the city of Joseph.

I had many questions, but they were all answered,

and the determination became strong within me

to be a defender of the gospel, of Zion and her cause,

come what may.

The same year I was baptized,

a young man halfway around the world was baptized also...

His name was Thomas Dobson.

You have gifts, Thomas.

Let the spirit guide you to foster them.

You can help others with them.

You Mormons!

Run, Thomas!

Though I continually fell short, I was trying to do better,

which helped me through the death of Brother Joseph,

the Mormon Battalion and many other trials.

At length, I made it to the Salt Lake Valley

and thought to continue my pursuits there in Zion.

Sidney! You know what the worst thing about multiple wives is?

Multiple mother-in-laws!

He thinks he's funny, but he's not.

Brother Brigham... Arza.

Eph, there is something that I would like you to do for me.

Before you spend another minute in this place,

I want you to go home and shave off that beard.

Yes, Brother.

Not a word.

I'm really not like my brother.

Well, what got into you?

I think the cat licked you clean.

I look like a peeled onion.