Mute Date

Dear Noah R. Gutman,

thank you for choosing to participate

in our beta test of Tellr.

Here at Tellr Laboratories,

we strive to create

a better way for people to communicate,

and your experience with Tellr

will help us toward that goal.

in this package, you will find:

this letter,

one Tellr pill,

a photograph of the fellow

beta tester that you will be

going on a blind date with.

You are to meet her today,

June 21st, 2020,

at three o'clock P.M.

at the following location:

Prospect Park, 9th Street Entrance,

at 9th Street and Prospect Park West,

Brooklyn, New York, 11215.

Please swallow the Tellr pill with water

at least one hour before meeting her.

Once you are within the boundaries of the park

and are within ten feet of each other,

the Tellr...

the Tellr nanocells should automatically

sync and become operational,

and will remain operational within

the boundaries of the park

for four hours.

Please remain in the park on your date

for those entire four hours.

That's about it!

We hope you have a pleasant time,

and above all else, be yourself.

Sincerely, all of us at Tellr laboratories.

Hey! Whoa, that's weird.

Hey. Yeah! Oh my god. Wow.

I'm sorry I was late.

It's fine, no worries.

Wow, this is so weird.

I know.

I can't believe it works.

Yeah, it's crazy.

It's like, it feels like the future right now,

like, we're in the future right now,

the present feels like the future, you know?

Totally.

So weird.

Do you wanna walk around?

Yeah, sure.

Cool.

Mute date, here we go!

Here we go.

So yeah, it’s

like a marketing company, kind of.

Basically we like, make videos and do social media

and stuff for brands.

And I do graphic design there, I do like,

graphics for videos

and make memes and stuff.

That’s cool.

Yeah, I like it for the most part.

Everyone’s pretty chill there.

The pay isn’t great, but it’s fine.

How about you, what do you do?

I do stand up, and like,

odd jobs on the side,

like, little things or whatever.

But mostly just stand up.

Cool. Do you do it around the city?

Yeah, and like, out of town sometimes too.

Awesome.

I’ve done it like, upstate, and in Canada,

Awesome.

and a couple other places here and there.

So, what’s, like,

how would you describe your comedy?

I guess, like... jokes?

Jokes?

That came out wrong.

A comedian that tells jokes. That’s very unique.

Yeah. Nah, I mean like...

like, one-liners. Do you know what one-liners are?

Yes, I know what one-liners are.

Some people don’t!

I didn’t mean it like

I thought you were stupid or anything.

Oh, wow, okay,

I wasn’t even thinking that,

but now I guess I have to.

No! I mean like... ugh.

I’m teasing. So, you’re a one-liner comedian?

Yeah. Yes.

Does the audience ever get sick

of your one line?

Oh man. That’s good.

I like that. That’s funny.

Thank you. Maybe I’ll become a comedian

with two lines and I’ll put you out of business.

Yeah, like, ‘hey, that guy with that

one line all the time, screw that guy,

this lady’s got two lines’.

‘Yeah, she’s got a whole other line.’

‘Yeah, she’s twice as good.’

‘Yeah.’

This park’s cool.

Yeah.

So, how did you hear about Tellr?

Uh,

well, I got like, an e-mail or whatever,

and, like, I thought it was spam

or fake or something,

and then I searched ‘Tellr’,

and I went to their website,

and it seemed interesting and real apparently,

so I went back to the e-mail

and I clicked the link in it,

and I did the questionnaire, and I got picked.

Same.

Word.

It’s funny, it’s like,

all this, like, it already feels

really natural to me.

Yeah. Yeah, me too.

It’s weird.

It’s like better, almost.

I don’t know. It’s...

it's like typing, but faster.

It’s like typing in the air really fast,

but like, with your brain, and without text,

yqou know?

Yeah, totally.

I dunno. I’d use it.

Not all the time, but like,

I could see myself using it.

Yeah, me too.

I mean, it’ll probably be

crazy expensive or something,

so, I probably wouldn’t even be able to afford it.

Yeah, it’ll probably be only

super rich people that’ll be able to

afford it and use it.

But then like, I guess years down the line,

everyone will have it, like cell phones.

Yeah, like,

it just seems new and like it’ll be

expensive right now,

but, then one day, it’ll just be real common.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Do you wanna, like,

find a guy with a cart or something

and get something to eat?

Yeah, sure.

Cool.

I mean, I wish we could eat at like,

a restaurant or something.

Yeah.

Yeah, it sucks that we have to stay in the park.

Yeah, it’s like we’re grounded or something.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Please stay within the boundaries

of the park for the entire four hours.

Thank you.

That was weird.

Yeah.

Did you know it could do that?

No.

I guess they’re listening to

whatever we’re saying.

Yeah. I mean,

I guess that makes sense.

Like, they’re doing their test or whatever.

They never really said they’d be

listening in on us though, right?

I don’t remember them saying they would be.

Yeah. I mean, I don’t know.

I didn’t really read the fine print or anything.

I didn’t either.

I dunno. It seems like everything

listens to everything these days.

Yeah.

I guess, like,

don’t say your passwords or anything.

I mean, yeah, I was gonna.

But now, I don’t know.

Yeah, it’s like, a good thing to do

on a first date, I think. Say your passwords.

Yeah, making out, that’s like, third date.

But sharing of passwords? First date, definitely.

Yeah. Yeah, exactly.

Yeah.

Thank you for helping me explain

what I wanted to the guy.

You’re very good at like,

pantomiming and pointing at stuff.

Thanks. Yeah, that was weird.