Kevin Can Wait

Yo!

- Hey! - Hey!

So, my neighbour had this on his porch.

It's supposed to be Buzz Lightyear,

but tell me who this looks like.

- Buzz Lightyear. - No!

Come on. It looks like you.

- Me?! - Yes!

I get... I'm getting Kyle.

- I don't get me. Yes! - Oh, stop it.

Anyway, take it.

I don't want pumpkin-Kevin pointed at my window

when I'm in the bathroom.

Believe me, pumpkin-Kevin

- doesn't want that, either. - All right.

Yo! Come in!

- Hey, neighbour! - Hey!

Hi! It's Tuesday.

You know what that means.

- Lasagna! - Lasagna!

Oh, hey, did you remember to

goose up the cheese a little bit

and just pump the brakes on the garlic?

Of course I did, silly. I listen.

The girls in my spin class say

I never listen, and I talk too much,

- but I don't really think that's... - Thank you! You're such

an angel and so great.

- Hello. - Hi.

Oh, I'm sorry. Uh, Wendy,

this is Vanessa. She's my business partner.

This is Wendy, best cook on Seville Lane.

Oh, I don't know about that.

Oh, please.

Anyway, if you have any more tweaks on the lasagna,

give me a yingle.

All right. Will do.

Hey, by the way, if some of your beef stew

showed up Sunday for the football game,

I wouldn't pass on it.

- Pass. Football. - Yeah.

He is so clever.

So clever.

- Buh-bye! - All right.

She is awesome.

You got all the women on the block cooking for you?

She knows I'm a single parent.

She brings over a little food.

Some people think it's nice to help out a little.

- Hey. - Hey.

Wendy was here again?

- Dad, you've got to end this. - End what?

You know exactly what.

- She's totally into you. - Yes!

"Any tweaks to the lasagna, give me a yingle."

I think we all know she wasn't

talking about tweaking the lasagna.

She's just being nice to our family.

Wendy wore Spanx to deliver ziti last week.

I don't care if she wore newspaper on fire.

All I see is the ziti.

Yams, yams.

Guys, where... where do we keep the yams?

Isn't a yam just a sweet potato?

No, no, huge difference.

One is very sweet and potato-y.

That's your, uh...

That's the sweet potato. The other...

The other is... it's more... Yeah, it's got a yammy...

It's yam. It's a yam substance, so it's yam.

- All right? - Oh, hey, guys, uh, listen,

any special requests for Thanksgiving?

Dad, actually, we were talking,

and we thought, you know,

maybe this year for Thanksgiving,

we'd go out to eat.

What? You cra...

Whose idea was thi...

Is it the new guy?

No.

Look, I know this is gonna be difficult without mom,

but, hey, we still have a lot

to be thankful for, all right?

And... every year, we have a big dinner

right here at home. It's tradition.

Let's just go out to dinner. It'll be so much easier.

And, plus, I have so much school. I can't help you.

I don't need your help.

I'm gonna make the whole thing myself

with these hands right here and a whole lot of love.

Now, who's with me? Come on!

I can make Scotch eggs with curry Mayo.

I'm gonna pretend that I didn't even hear that.

- I can make the cornbread. - Boom, Sara! There you go!

That's the Thanksgiving spirit right there.

Thanksgiving spirit. That's not a thing.

Oh, no, no, no, no, no.

It's definitely a thing, okay?

That's a common misconception.

Kids...

the spirit of Thanksgiving

is actually the spirit of the Pilgrims

coming together with the Indians

to celebrate the harvest of the Fall bounty.

They did it by bringing corn

and turkey to the villagers,

who had potatoes,

and they would mash them out of anger

'cause they were so upset... at first...

But then it turned to mashing out of love.

And they said, uh...

In Indian, they said, "Thanks."

And then... then, in Pilgrim, said,

"You know, we're just giving to you,"

and they said... and that was it...

"Thanks" and "Giving," and it came together,

and that's what created Thanksgiving.

I'm not gonna lie. I get a little lost there, yeah.

Does your dad like me?

Of course he does. Why?

I don't know. I just thought that after the wedding,

I'd see a change in our relationship.

Yeah. Like what?

Ideally...

we'd have one?

I mean, shouldn't we be hanging out,

calling each other nicknames,

and making eye contact?

Nicknames?

Like what?

Uh, I don't know. Uh...

Chale-y?

K-Bizzle?

Mm...

Yeah, no nicknames.

Well, I've got to do something.

We're family!

I'm gonna sire his grandchildren.

Okay. Definitely do not mention

"siring" in front of him.

You know what I mean.

I'm his son-in-law.

I should at least be able to call him "dad."

Well, why don't you try

just bonding with him, you know?

Guy stuff.

Watching a football game.

Share a couple of beers,

and we can talk about hot sauce and cuts of meat.

Yeah, and then you just...

You know, you slip a "dad" in under your breath.

Done, done, done! Done. Okay.

Like this.

"Whoa!

"This piece of prosciutto

"really has some kick, Daddio."

Yes! Yes. Exactly! That's great.

But if you go with "daddio,"

make sure you're like 5 feet away,

because he will lunge at you.

Hey.

- Hey. - I brought you your paycheck.

- What are you doing? - Oh, thanks.

I am prepping for Thanksgiving tomorrow

and changing the way America peels potatoes.

Check it out.

Okay.

There we go.

That one came off. That's all right.

It's okay.

Those are the little cherry potatoes.

- Okay. - One of the...

Meet the Kevin Gable Tater Turner, huh?

You get it? It's like the George Foreman Grill.

Yes. Only stupid.

I'm telling you, this thing's gonna

spread like crazy across the country.

- Everybody's gonna want one. - All right, well,

put me down for none.

- Okay. - Come on. Just lose the drill.

- Let me help you. - No.

Look, I invited you tomorrow as a guest,

and that's what you are... a guest, all right?

- All right. - I appreciate it,

- but I don't need the help. - Listen, I... I get it.

This is the first Thanksgiving that...

That you're taking care of,

but let me just help you, okay?

It's a lot more work than you think.

Okay, can I tell you who had a lot more work

- than they thought? - Who?

Little group I like to call the Pilgrims.

Did you know that once they debarked the Mayflower,

- you know what they did? - What'd they do?

- They got after it. - Mm.

Yes. They got after it. They rolled up

their little black-and-white sleeves,

they tightened their massive belt buckle

and their shoe buckle and the hat buckle...

All the buckles were tightened up...