Take a Girl Like You

- Thank you very much. - Pleasure.

- Mr Thompson? - The very same.

I'm, er... Jenny Bunn, the new lodger.

Oh, yes, yes. The new, er... yes.

Well, entrez.

You've timed your arrival rather well.

Supper'll be ready in a few minutes.

I'll show you to your room, if you'd like to follow me.

- Oh, Anna. - I won't be eating in tonight, Dick. Night.

That was Anna. Your fellow lodger.

Great fun, Anna. You'll like her.

- Mmm. She looked very nice. - Ooh, she is.

She's very nice. Yes.

Yes.

It's a long haul.

Good for the figure, though.

- Thank you. - Yes, right.

Now, this cupboard...

- Yes, this cupboard is all yours. - Very nice.

And the chest of drawers.

- Over here. - Oh.

The top two drawers are yours.

I'm afraid the wife rather likes to keep the spare bedding in the, um...

- The lower ones? - In the lower ones, exactly.

Yes, um, er...

You'll be wanting to see the, er... geography.

That's the loo, and so on.

Er... if you ever...

Ooh, there is just one little thing.

Dick! I asked you to lay the table ages ago! Supper is practically ready!

Just coming, poppet.

I'm just showing Miss Bunn the geography.

I'm afraid we'll have to continue our little briefing session later on.

Dick! Come on! Where are you? - Coming!

Move your arse! You're supposed to be helping me!

A lot of bloody use you are, I must say!

Miss Bunn!

Nourishment!

Coming.

Anna!

Anna?

Ah.

She's just gone out.

Has she?

- And you're the new lodger? - Yes.

Miss Bunn!

We...

Oh, it's you, Patrick.

Anna's just left.

Yes, so Miss, um...

Oh, this is Jenny Bunn. Patrick Standish.

Miss Bunn's a teacher.

- Albert Road Primary. - Great.

Well, we're just about to eat.

Mustn't keep Miss Bunn from her calorie intake, must we?

- Oh, I'll join you. - Oh, there's just...

Don't worry, I've already eaten.

Well, you won't mind watching us at the trough, then.

Er... Miss Bunn, would you like to...

I hope you're satisfied. The fish is dry as a bone.

Not guilty, Your Honour. No, young Patrick here is the culprit.

- He's been chatting up our, er... - Oh, hello there, stranger.

- I'm afraid Anna's gone out... - Martha, my angel, you're looking

- sexier than ever. Thanks. You too.

Well, I'm afraid, er... young Patrick's manly charms

have rather made Martha forget the common courtesies.

You found us all right, then?

Thompson, you forgot the cruet!

Cruet.

Sit down anywhere you like, love.

My old man made a pass at you yet?

Not to worry. He will.

Just give him a kick in the crutch.

Want some fish, Paddy? You might as well have Anna's.

Oh, no, thanks. No, really, I've, um...

I've eaten.

Cross my heart.

- It's all so terrible here. - (GIGGLING)

What's the joke, then, dear?

- Anything we can all share? - Oh. No, nothing.

What do you do, Mr Standish?

Oh, my name's Patrick, actually.

I teach as well.

Oh, whence the unaccustomed modesty, young Patrick?

Our Mr Standish is a distinguished moulder of young minds at our technical college.

"Our technical college"? Anyone would think he was the Minister of Education

instead of a crummy town councillor.

Some people fail to grasp the importance of local government.

And what are your politics, Miss Bunn?

Um...

Well, my dad's always been Labour.

Splendid!

Then we can count on your support at the coming elections.

I'm afraid I've never voted.

You're a born loser, Thompson.

What do you teach?

Oh, er... graphics

Lettering, design,

television advertising,

films, credits.

- That sort of thing. - Oh.

I'll make the tea. I'll get it.

You could have taught in a school up north.

What made you come to a dump like this?

- Well, it's not Buckingham Palace, but it's... - All right, my darling.

I didn't mean a dump like this !

Well, a dump like this.

This town, you mean?

Mmm.

Well?

Trouble with t'folks?

Is that your idea of a northern accent?

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

Only I thought maybe we could have had dinner together one night alone,

away from cod and...

councillor.

Out of the question, I suppose?

Aye aye. Speedy Gonzales strikes again.

Oh, I think I'll skip the tea. It's, um...

Well, it's my first night back and I've got a lot to do, and things.

Say good night to Dick for me, will you?

Bye.

- Hello. - Hello.

How about that dinner that was out of the question?

Still is.

Why?

I don't date other girls' boys.

Anna?

Do me a favour!

You know, this may...

well, sound like a bit of a line,

but I've been waiting for years for something like you to happen.

Thank you, kind sir.

There you go.

You birds have had the same line shot at you for so long,

that when some poor twit comes along and tells you the truth...

Oh, you say it nice. I'll give you that.

Um...

- Would you like another one of those? - No, thank you. I'm half tipsy already.

Lovely.

Um...

Um... that will be all right.

I'll, um... get your coat, shall I?

Mmm.

- Thank you. - Bye.

Bye.

- This the one? - Yes, that's it.

Thanks.

Oh, no.

What the hell are they doing here?

Well, well, well.

Patrick and Jenny.

Just good friends, I take it?

- Hello. - Small world.

Yes, too bloody small.

Your table is ready, sir.

Right, thank you.

You will stay to join us for a little libation ere you depart, eh, Jenny?

Oh, you're not going to buy us a drink, are you, Thompson?

Because if you are, we'll have one.

Oh...

This way. The boy's on form again.

Right, here we go. Now, if you'd like to...

You go in there, my dear.

Now, what'll it be for everybody?

- Excuse me, do you mind if I take this chair? - Same again for us.

A couple of postprandials for this comedian and his young lady companion.

Somebody else must be paying for this.

Somebody else is.

Here he is. Here's Julian now.

He's a grand chap. You'll love him. I guarantee that.

- Who is he? A fellow traveller.

- He's helping Dick with his election campaign. - And buying you dinner, it seems.