What If...?

Time.

Space.

Reality.

It's more than a linear path.

It's a prism of endless possibility,

where a single choice can branch out into infinite realities,

creating alternate worlds from the ones you know.

I am the Watcher.

I am your guide through these vast new realities.

Follow me and ponder the question...

"What if?"

For the win. This is it.

And this is it, for the win.

For the win. This is it.

For the...

Yes! First try. Jane, you owe me 50...

Uh... Oh! Uh...

Uh, Jane, Jane, Jane!

It's beeping! It's doing the beeping!

I need to talk to the director of S.H.I.E.L.D.

Because, if my data is correct,

I believe an alien invasion is imminent and...

Hello?

Two years ago, the same anomaly struck Star Alpha Icarus

and the entire star dimmed and then, poof, disintegrated.

Yes, I know this is the Parks Department, but isn't there something you can do?

Talking about the end of the world, my dude.

They're here.

We're too late. The invasion has begun.

- Holy moly! Oh!

Citizens of Midgard...

your dull lives are about to come to an end.

Prepare yourselves...

for the party prince!

This is gonna be awesome. Whoo!

More than battles won or lost,

it's relationships that truly define a hero.

The people who shape them, their stories.

Thor and Loki, a brotherhood so strong and pivotal,

it would change the fate of a universe.

Their childhood taught Thor many lessons.

But in another universe,

instead of raising the Jotunheim prince, Loki, as his own son,

Odin returned him to his people.

Without his trickster brother to keep things, let's say, lively,

Thor grew into a very different prince.

Rest, my love.

Allow the Odinsleep to restore your body and soul.

He's asleep. And, uh...

I'm off to my sister's to celebrate the solstice.

Now, this is your first taste of kinghood, my prince.

I expect you to study,

read up on the Nine Realms that you will one day rule.

Of course, Mother.

- No parties. - Of course, Mother.

Remember, Heimdall will be watching.

Wait, what? You can't be serious.

Behave.

Oh, Heimdall, there you are.

Just off to study. Books won't read themselves.

But your mother said...

Don't be such a wet blanket, Hogun.

Oh, guys, stop. My father has ruled Asgard for centuries.

And, look, the most interesting thing that he's ever done is fall asleep.

He only cares about duty and blah-blah-blah-blah responsibility.

Well, I'm not gonna be like him, right? The boring king? Uh-uh.

But Heimdall sees all. If we try anything, he'll call Frigga.

Oh, ye of little faith.

We are going to the most backward,

backwater planet that not even Heimdall pays attention to.

Alert the realms.

Party on Midgard!

Yes!

Huzzah!

To Thor, the party prince!

- Welcome! Welcome, friends. - Party prince!

Enjoy the night.

Thunder hug.

Here, have a drink. It never runs out.

You try to drink it all, but you can't because it's magic! Huzzah!

Huzzah! Thor! Thor! Thor! Thor! Thor!

Hollywood movies did not prepare me for this.

Shouldn't there be more lasers? Probing? A flying cow?

According to my data,

the first extraterrestrial to arrive was...

Him?

Huh. I expected him to look more like...

Like what? E.T.? And less like a hottie McScotty, beach body Ken,

old-school Abercrombie catalog? I could go on. Let me.

I'm gonna go talk to him.

I'm gonna make first contact with an alien.

First? I think half the Strip beat you to it.

You can make first contact with...

I don't know, that guy. He looks like a loser.

Ha! Big talk coming from a brunette.

I'm going. How do I look?

Completely unprepared for whatever happens next.

Oh, do me, do me.

Yes, you do me. You do me, and you too.

Oh, you guys really get me. Yes?

Huh? Oh.

Oh, there you are, all the way down there.

So tiny, I almost stood on you. How are you?

I'm Dr. Jane Foster of Earth.

Yeah, Thor, Crown Prince of Asgard.

Uh, libations, crudité, baked goods?

Mmm. Topaz, what do I always say?

- I love cake. - Mmm.

Wait, wait, wait. You're Thor?

As in Thor, the Norse god of thunder?

I don't know anything about horse gods, but I do know how to bring the thunder.

Uh... Okay, moving on.

Eighteen months ago, Alpha Star Icarus died.

The astronomaly that preceded it...

- happened again tonight. - Don't drink too much.

- Or too little. - Hey, thunder boy.

What I'm asking is, was that you?

Yes, Alpha Star. Now, that was an excellent party.

You know, we lost Fandral for three days.

Found him in a barn, curled up next to a baby goat.

It was classic. Isn't that right, Fandral?

I named him Gary.

- Yeah, you did. Yeah, goats!

You killed a planet.

Oh, what is that light box thing you've got there?

Oh, it's magic. I love magic. Did you build this all by yourself?

Excuse me? I happen to be an astrophysicist with multiple PhDs.

You know, it would take a whole team of Asgardians to create such a thing.

You must be a genius. You are a genius, aren't you?

Well, I don't know about genius, but...

And your eyes...

Do all geniuses have such deep, dark eyes?

It's like watching the birth of two stars on the edge of the galaxy.

Oh.

Well, it's happy hour. Want some half-price nachos?

Okay, fine, Duck. But this is not a date.

Let's just see where this evolves.

Huh?

Release the foam.

Blow on these.

Momma needs a brand-new eye.

Volstagg has crashed!

I now pronounce you Darcy and the Duck.

Uh-huh

Ah.

Ah, phone.

Ah, phone... Phone! Oh, shut up!

Dr. Jane Foster?

Coming. I'm coming.

Dr. Jane Foster!

Hold on.

Dr. Jane Foster, this is S.H.I.E.L.D.

If you do not answer, we will...

Yes?

We have her, ma'am.

Maria Hill, Acting Director of S.H.I.E.L.D.

- You need to come with us. - Uh...

Can this wait until after breakfast? 'Cause...

You were the first to warn us about this extraterrestrial threat.

Now I hope you will be the key to eliminating it.

"Threat"? Would you call him a threat, really?

Do you wanna know why I am the Acting Director, Dr. Foster?

Nope.

Hey, Spicoli. This might be your party, but this isn't your planet.

Before someone gets hurt, I need...

Ball cannons!

Oh!

- Is he okay? - He's still unconscious.

We getting food?

Do you have company, Dr. Foster?

Uh... A friend.

Guys, guys, look. There's a cute little rabbit in the sink.

Oh, look at this little rabbit. It's gorgeous.

He's... a zoologist. I'll call you, okay?

I told you everything.

I followed the anomaly's origin to Vegas.

And then what did you do?

Um... Uh...

Director, the party atmosphere seems to be spreading.

Canada, Mongolia, even Pennsylvania Dutch country.

Led by the main instigator, Thor of Asgard,

who's now taken to the skies.

What? He left?

Did he... Did he even leave a note at...

I mean, did... Did he say where he was going?

- Smooth. - Thanks.

- Sarcasm. Paris.

One of his compatriots was, and I quote, "jonesing for crêpes."

Ma'am...

the last resort has arrived.

Whoa, whoa. "Last resort" sounds very final.

This is Earth's first encounter with alien life.

How we respond today will set the tone for diplomatic relations

between our worlds for generations.

"Diplomatic relations"? Is that what the kids are calling it?

You're wrong, Doctor.

This isn't S.H.I.E.L.D.'s first alien rodeo.

A beeper? My dad has one! He's a podiatrist.

Wait, are you guys calling a podiatrist?

It's done.