Wilfred

Okay, are you ready?

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Joffrey.

Jeffrey?

Joffrey, like the ballet.

Oh, that's...

That's really good.

You don't like it.

No, no, I do.

I-I think Joffrey's a great name

for a-a boy.

You're lying, Ryan. You won't even look at me.

I'm sorry, Kristen.

C-can you maybe just not do that in front of me?

Uh, no, Ryan, I won't starve my baby for you.

You're gonna have to get comfortable

with stuff like this.

I know, I know.

Look, when we were little,

I was the one who had to hold the family together.

I didn't ask for any help from you,

but I am asking for it now.

Joffrey needs a male influence in his life, okay?

Okay.

I-I'm here for you,

and I'll get comfortable watching you breastfeed.

Don't be a pervert, Ryan.

Can you hold him?

I am so thirsty; This baby sucks the life out of me.

Burp him?

Uh...

Uh... Kristen?

Oh, Jesus.

Shh, stop crying.

Stop crying.

You're good; Stop crying.

Shh, stop crying.

Stop crying.

Stop, stop, stop, stop.

Um...

Stop crying.

Shh. I just...

I-I need, uh...

Ryan?

Talk to me mate. What's going on?

Ryan! Oh, my God.

It's a panic attack.

Oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God.

We're having a panic attack down here.

I'm okay.

You okay?

I don't know what just happened.

I-I was holding Kristen's baby, and...

And-and it started to cry,

and then all of a sudden, it felt like I was...

I-I was suffocating.

You just say the word, and that baby

will pay for what it's done to you.

Don't do anything to the baby, Wilfred.

We understand each other.

Seriously, don't.

Right, gotcha.

The-the baby's not the problem, Wilfred.

Oh, my God.

Ryan, look at what your panic is doing to me.

I'm absorbing

your stress.

Ryan,

we need to find out the cause of this anxiety.

It's not the baby.

Maybe it's your mom getting worse

or losing your job?

I can find another job,

and my mom's getting better.

What about Amanda?

What about Amanda?

Well, just, we've never talked about it.

What's there to talk about?

We broke up.

It sucks, but that's life.

Can we drop it, please?

What about your boss' suicide?

I mean, someone ate his brains.

I mean, that's twisted.

Did they ever find who did that, by the way?

So, this will mellow me out?

You ask a lot of questions, bro.

I asked one question.

No, no, no, it's good, man.

You know, I had a lot of questions, too.

I just got back from an insane two weeks in Peru, man.

Had a glorious spiritual awakening.

Got an assload of answers.

You ever hear of Ayahuasca?

It's unreal, man.

What is it?

It's this extract from a vine.

They call it "The Teacher"

because while you're tripping on it,

you're supposed to ask yourself these questions and shit,

and the answers come from with inside your brain, man.

So, what did you ask?

That's between me and my spirit guide.

Anyway, I brought some back with me.

Could sell you a little bit if you want.

I'll take some.

Right on.

I'm excited for you.

I should warn you, the trip will probably start out

with some nausea and vomiting.

Awesome.

Also, make sure

you surrender to your trip completely,

'cause if you fight it even a little bit,

your trip could turn into a nightmare.

W-what do you mean? You could lose your mind completely

and never come back.

All right, let's do this, Ryan. Thanks, mate.

You know what, I changed my mind.

Um, can I just get my money back?

Sorry, man.

No refunds, store policy.

You got to find a way to calm down.

I'm shedding my ass off over here.

It's not noticeable, is it?

Hey, Kristen.

Did I leave Joffrey's pacifier at your place?

Um, I'm not sure.

Let me ask in a different way.

I left Joffrey's pacifier at your place.

Can you please find it?

Sure.

Thank you.

Just being such a little dickhead.

Sorry, d-head.

You know, he will not stop crying without it.

Shh, Joffrey.

Don't cry, baby, don't cry.

It's okay; Stop crying.

Okay, stop crying please. Um, Kristen?

I got to... I got to run.

I'll call you back.

What's happening?

Are we panicking?

Shit.

We are panicking.

Here we go.

Ryan.

I-I wasn't even holding the baby. Ryan.

I just heard it.

Just got to pull ourselves together.

Wilfred, calm down.

Aah! No!

You calm down.

First my tail and now bear?

Why are you doing this to us?

Mmm, it's gonna be okay.

We're gonna figure this out.

You're right; Of course we are.

That's what the Ayahuasca's for.

What? Are you kidding me?

I couldn't handle a drug like that right now.

I'd lose my mind.

Well, I hope that's not true. Why?

Because you've kind of been drinking it all this time.

Wilfred, how could you do this?

I don't know, Ryan. I'm a monster.

But you can fix bear, I know you can.

I don't care about bear.

You dosed me with a dangerous hallucinogenic drug.

That was a joke.

So, you didn't dose me?

No, I dosed you.

The thing about fixing bear, that was a joke.

We need to get to a hospital.

Come on, Ryan, bear doesn't have insurance.

I meant me. There's no time.

I feel sick.

I-I... I can't do this.

You can do this.

It'll be worth it.

You'll find the answer to your panic attack,

and I'll get my tail back.

Just don't fight it.

If you do, you could lose yourself

inside your own head for all eternity.

But most importantly,

have fun with it.

Maybe if I just rest.

Hey, Ryan, look.

Oh, my God, Ryan!

There's so much good stuff out here.

There's a lot of good stuff up ahead.

I'm gonna go check it out.

Oh, wow, it's so good.

Wait till you see what's ahead.

Okay, sorry, go at your own pace.

There's no rush.

But just hurry up.

Wilfred,

none of this is real.