Friends

- Ready? Okay. - Yeah.

- Hi. Rachel. Phoebe's. - It's. And.

- Please. - Leave.

Leave.

But I just said "leave."

Yeah, I know, because you have all the good words.

What do I get? I get "it's, and." Oh, I'm sorry, I have "A." Forget it.

- Come on, that's silly. - All right. So let's switch.

No, I have all the good words.

Okay, fine, fine. We can switch.

- Okay. - Okay.

- Hi. - Everybody.

- It's. - Rachel.

- And. - Phoebe's.

Pleas... Wait. How did you do that?

What?

Oh, you're no ordinary roommate, are you?

Phoebe, come on, can we finish this later? I wanna go running before it gets dark.

- Why don't you come with me? - Really?

Yeah, oh, it'll be fun.

We'll run in the park. It'll be like our first, you know, roommate-bonding thing.

Okay, let's go running!

- Yeah, and there's cute guys there. - Let's run towards them!

Okay.

Wait just one more second.

Hi, it's Phoebe and Rachel's. Please leave a message. Thanks!

Now, wait a minute. You just took all the words.

Uh-huh. You've met your match, Rachel Green.

- So I just finished this fascinating book. - Hmm.

By the year 2030, there'll be computers...

...that can carry out the same amount of functions as an actual human brain.

So, theoretically, you could download...

...your thoughts and memories into this computer...

...and live forever as a machine.

And I just realized I can sleep with my eyes open.

- Hey. Hey.

Honey, it was a great idea, nailing the boxes to the floor.

- I didn't nail the boxes to the floor. - Oh, so you can move them.

Yes.

Yes, and while I'm doing that, Ross has a great computer story for you.

Hey, everybody. Uh, I'd like you to meet Janine.

She's gonna be my new roommate.

- Hi. Hi.

And she's gonna live with me!

It's nice to meet you. Janine?

Lecroix. Janine Lecroix.

I didn't know that. What a pretty last name.

So, uh, where are you from?

Australia. I just moved here a couple of weeks ago.

- From the land down under? - Yeah.

I didn't know that either.

So, what do you do?

- I'm a dancer. - You're a dancer?

She's a dancer.

- Well, I think I'll go and unpack. - Here, let me...

- Joey? Yeah?

Did you even interview this woman before you asked her to move in?

- Of course I did. - Uh-huh.

What exactly did you ask her?

When can you move in?

Thank you for bringing her into our lives.

Unbelievable.

Oh. Oh, so you like her too, Chandler?

Hey, look at all the boxes.

I cannot wait to ask her out.

Wait a minute, Joey. Joey, you can't ask her out.

She's your roommate. It'll be way too complicated.

Yeah, man, don't do it.

I mean, if you date her, then I can't date her.

Think about it. Remember when you were going out with Donna and you broke up...

...remember how horrible it was when you bumped into her at the supermarket?

Oh, God, yeah.

Now imagine you live at the supermarket.

Okay.

- No, no. - Oh. Oh.

You're right. I don't want that. I can't date her.

And you'd better watch the flirting too, because in close quarters...

...it could be trouble. - Well, that's gonna be tough, Mon.

I mean, it's hard for me to be around an attractive woman and not flirt.

Heh. Well, you're around me all the time, and you don't flirt.

A little sad about that, sweetie?

I have to tie my shoes, so you go ahead. I'll catch up.

- Okay. Okay.

Come on, that's not running. Let's go!

You guys, I'm telling you, when she runs...

...she looks like a cross between Kermit the Frog...

...and the Six Million Dollar Man.

Monica had such a crush on him. Ha, ha.

She used to kiss his poster every night before she went to bed.

I used to do that too.

Oh, my God. Did you also have his album, It's Not Easy Being Green?

Oh, Mon.

So Phoebe runs weird, huh?

Yeah. And you know what? And I know she's gonna want to run again.

I don't know how to get out of it. I mean, I live with her.

Why don't you just be straight with her? Tell her the truth.

You're right. You're right. I should just tell her the truth.

- Hey. Hey.

Hey, Pheebs, Monica tripped me. I don't think I can ever run again, ever.

Why? Why would you do that?

I don't know.

Rachel, I'm sorry that I hurt your ankles.

- Ankle. - We'll see.

Okay. I am officially unpacked.

Thanks for helping me, man.

Joe?

Well, I guess Joey went home.

Oh, and look, there is still one box that I have to unpack.

I got you.

Oh, my God, you almost gave me a heart attack.

It was so hard not to laugh, I'll tell you.

Hey, the place looks great.

Yeah, not bad, right?

You know what? Monica's working late, so I'm gonna make this place spotless.

You know what else I'm gonna do?

I'm gonna go downstairs, I'm gonna get her some flowers.

Now, who would not want to live with me?

I don't.

No, I want to live with the super-hot Australian dancer.

How's that going, though? Are you okay with the not-flirting thing?

Yeah, so far. Yeah. But it's tough, you know?

I've got all this built-up flirting energy, and I don't know how to get rid of it.

How you doing?

Oh, man.

Sorry. There's just more room out here.

Oh, no, no, you just, uh, reminded me that I have to do my stretches too.

- Why don't you try to be? - Aah!

- What's wrong? - Uh, nothing.

I just... I didn't want you to touch me...

...because I'm all sweaty from the workout. Ha, ha.

I'm gonna hit the shower.

Oh, my God.

Oh, sorry about that stuff hanging in there.

It's just my thongs are too delicate for the dryer.

Aah! Hi.

Oh, yeah, uh-huh, it's me.

I saw you grab your running shoes this morning and sneak out.

You lied so you could run by yourself.

No, Phoebe, no. I was... No.

I was actually just checking...

...to see...

...if I could run. And I can.

Please, Rachel, I'm not an idiot.

No, wait. Phoebe?

Wow. Couples who live together do start to look alike.

So, Mondler...

Uh...

What, uh...? What are you doing?

What does it look like? I am cleaning.

Did you get Monica's authorization to move all of her stuff?

Authorizat... I don't need that. I'm gonna put everything back.

Put it back exactly where you found it?

Yes. I'm gonna put it back exactly where I found it.

Okay, first of all, that attitude is not helping.

She won't care if I put her stuff back in the same stupid place.

Hello? Did you just meet Monica?

She's gonna recognize that I did a nice thing...

...and appreciate it.

Huh. No, actually, this will work out well.

Because when you have to move back with Joey...

...Joey's hot new roommate can come live with me.

Oh, I see, I see. You're trying to freak me out.

Look, Chandler, Monica is really weird about this kind of stuff, all right?

Believe me, I lived with her for 16 years. She's going to freak out.

Oh, my God. She's going to sit on you.

No, she is not, okay? I'll prove it to you.

I'm gonna call her right now.

Phone's done.

Hi. - Hey, Mon. How's it going?

Terrible. If I want something done right, I have to do it myself.

Other people just wreck stuff.

I really think I might kill someone tonight.

Oh, come on, come on, it can't be that bad.

It's worse. The only thing getting me through...

...is knowing I'm gonna see you soon.

- I might get out of here early. - No. No, no, no.

No, no, it sounds like they need you there.

- You're just hanging out with Ross? - It's all good. Okay, bye, Mon.

She's gonna kill me.

The phone was facing the other way.

And that goes back up there.

Know what we should do? We should start with the big stuff.

That'll be the easiest. So, uh, let's start with the couch.

I got it.

Yeah, that doesn't look right.