Disconnected (Blue Weekend)

Come on!

Let's do it!

That's me, and this is the only decent part of my day.

After this my life only looks good on paper.

- First time I killed one.. - Yeah.

So special. All that blood was magnificent.

I watched it. It wasn't that special.

And these are my friends. They're a little weird.

Isn't that right, Sean?

'Look, we're just trying to help you with your mom.'

Wait, so you want me to slit her throat?

The Val Moreth is your mom, Sean.

She's the most dangerous crafty creature in all of Allenton.

She's ethereal.

'She's beautiful.'

'The kind of woman knights would fight to save.'

But it's all a clever ruse just to lure you in.

Can't go to her unprepared. Unh-unh.

Too many good plans have been sacrificed and slaughtered

at her perfectly manicured feet.

Hey, don't talk about my mom's feet.

- That's weird. - 'Focus, man.'

We're helping you here. It's not like you're related so...

Alright. That's it. I'm out.

I don't need to hear that.

Alright. So, are you coming this weekend?

I'll be there.

Thank you, baby Jesus.

Oh, for the record, I beat the Val Moreth in under two hours.

- Fuck! - Ouch.

Easy goes.. Two hours, dude?

- That's.. - You cheater.

'Your mom's a cheater, and that's why you're alive.'

Alright, just look at page 92.

I have two women in my life.

One I wanna get away from, and one I wish I could see.

The first is my mom.

She sends me a checklist I have to complete

by the end of the day, every day.

The second woman is Chloe.

She texts me all day asking to hang out.

Even though she lives on the other side of the state.

'Sean?'

Um, I don't know.

I didn't ask you a question.

Oh!

Oh, um..

My bad.

Anything you wanna talk about?

Uh, no.

Just spaced out a bit.

For the whole class?

Part of it.

I caught.. Yeah, I was spaced out for most of it.

Mm-hmm. Well, I'll make you a deal.

You show up on Monday, alert and engaged

and I'll pretend you weren't lookin' at your phone.

What if I wasn't lookin' at my phone?

Well, then we have to call your folks in

for a little chat.

So, Monday, alert, engaged, and ready.

- Mm. - Thank you, Mrs. Lucas.

Have a wonderful weekend. Bye.

But I'm not going anywhere.

I'm my mom's favorite science experiment.

She used to measure the pH level of my pee.

Yeah, like a psycho.

Hi, mom.

'Lots of skateboard traffic today?'

It's like a minute past 3:30.

Or was it that the wave traffic was good?

Yeah, well, all we have is a quiz review today.

So, I knew I aced that.

Oh. Did you now?

Read it and weep.

Well done.

Don't let that face fool you.

She's trying to find a reason for me

not to go surf camping this weekend.

She's great at saying one thing when she means another.

Luckily, I know how to read the subtitles.

Be careful. It's hot.

Don't forget that there's gluten in soy sauce.

You really wanna go?

I will text you. I will call you.

I will email you if there's 4G. Okay?

Go, seriously. Have fun this weekend.

You and dad, 20 years together.

- It's awesome. - Okay, little fish.

Well, listen, I'm gonna go and pick up dad from work.

And I can give you a ride to piano if you like.

Don't worry about me. Just go.

Always better to be early.

I am not going to piano.

I need a diversion.

I was thinking..

Is there any chance that we could change piano to Tuesday?

Mnm-mnm, no. Math tutor is on Tuesdays and so is tennis.

Maybe we could drop tennis?

'Sweetie, we talked about this.'

You know colleges are really competitive right now.

You have to be well-rounded.

Just would really love some time with myself, to..

Waste.

Can I at least skate to piano?

Please?

Alright. Okay.

But be careful, and don't be late.

I won't. Hey, have fun this weekend.

Mm. Yeah.

- I'll miss you. - Miss you too.

Clean that up when you're done.

Okay? Thank you.

And that is how you dislodge a helicopter parent.

I can't believe she actually fell for it.

She's totally off her game.

Oh, Lord.

She's texting me now because I should still be at piano.

Piano was explosive.

Not falling for that one.

This isn't good. My friends are right.

The Val Moreth isn't going down easy this time.

She's even roped my dad in.

But if I can crack him

she's done for.

So you guys haven't left yet.

We just wanted to check on our piano prodigy.

Oh, honey, just let him explain.

The Val Moreth isn't going down easy this time.

Maybe because I'm tired of going to piano.

But you said that you agreed.

'No, I didn't agree. You just made me.'

We pay for piano, you go to piano.

Well, easy, fix it. Don't pay.

Look, Sean, how can we trust you to be responsible

on a trip, if you lie to my face?

Answer your mother.

Technically, you were the one that said I could go

so that makes you the liar.

No, actually, that makes you grounded.

- Ahem! - 'You know, you promised.'

What makes you think

our promises are unconditional?

I don't know what she promised him

but he's not budging.

I'm gonna have to attack her where it hurts.

I don't know, maybe because I thought you loved me.

You know what, that may work with your mother

but you need to learn that your actions have consequences.

Actions? What actions?

I don't even get out of the house.

You know what, you're not going.

Great. Well, that's what you wanted. Right, mom?

So, congratulations. You win.

Just go tell Brent's mother there's been a change in plans.

What are you doing?

I'm taking what's mine.

That was my birthday present.

When you start acting like you deserve it, you can have it.

So, you're just gonna leave me here without anything to do?

I'm sure you can find a book or something to read.

It's not yours.

Stop it.

Nothing in this house is yours

because you didn't pay for it.

'Your clothes, your games or your surfboard. Nothing.'

Well, maybe you should call the adoption agency

and see if you can get your money back, huh?

You know what, just stop being melodramatic. Okay?

This is about consequences. There's plenty of kids...

Whose parents let them do whatever they want.

Please, could you point me in their direction

'cause I would love to find a set of those.

I am locking up your surfboards.

Little fish! Sean?

You made this choice, Sean.

So, you're gonna have to deal with it.

'Lisa.'

Val Moreth always rubs it in when she wins.

This is my life. Be perfect or suffer.

But I'm done trying.

I'm gonna find the spare key to unlock my boards

and then I'm gonna go surfing

until my parents come home Sunday night.