The Suite Life of Zack & Cody

Mom!

Why can't you drive us to the playground?

Because I have to rehearse new choreography

for my next show.

Mr. moseby thinks I need some younger moves.

What do you think?

I think you should never do that in public.

Or in private.

Why don't you guys invite over some friends from school?

That's a great idea.

Too bad we don't have any.

Nobody ever likes the new kids.

Come here.

You'll make friends soon.

We're here to stay now.

Not if you use those moves.

Impressive catch, Esteban.

If you thought that was impressive, Mr. moseby,

watch this.

Ooh! I can hear the ocean.

Let me hear!

I wanna hear!

London, I need to speak with you.

Not now, moseby.

I'm off to a gala premier.

Oh, no, you're not.

I just received a fax from your father.

You are to cease all social activities

until your grades improve.

That is so unfair.

I have to keep my grades up,

but his new wife is allowed to drop out of college?

He also insisted I hire you a tutor.

When is he gonna realize that education and me just don't mix?

Education and I.

Hello? This isn't about you.

Ok. That's $9.12,

minus your 8% senior discount is $8.38.

Out of 10?

1.62 is your change.

You beat the cash register!

And you read!

Maddie can be your new tutor.

What?! What?!

There isn't enough money in the world.

I'll pay you triple your salary.

Apparently there is enough.

Cody, check it out.

It's the drew crew.

Yo, drew.

What up, dawg?

Ha! Hey, look, it's the clones.

Did you hear that?

The drew crew just mocked us!

Woo-hoo! We're in.

The drew crew will never accept you.

Don't beat your head against a wall.

Even thought it feels good sometimes.

I'm Max, by the way.

And this is tapeworm.

What kind of name is that?

The kind you get when you eat 20 hot dogs in less than 2 minutes.

Cool!

Beats my record.

By 18.

Hey! You guys wanna come over to our house?

Did you hear that?

SOMEONE WANTS US TO COME OVER TO THEIR HOUSE!

Mom!

O...K.

What are you doing?

Apparently I'm embarrassing myself

in front of your new friends.

You made friends!

Maybe.

Whoa!

This is so tight!

I was just rehearsing for--

My new show.

Man, look at you go.

Wow!

Can you show me how you do that?

Sure.

Ok. No.

The part a mom can actually do.

Oh, ok.

So how's your research on Italy coming?

Oh, fantastic!

I had no idea

fabrizio sold dresses over the Internet.

I'll order you one.

What are you...

A 14?

Yes!

The same as your iq.

I have to get downstairs.

He's probably there already.

Who's there?

No one.

No one who?!

Is he cute?

Ha. It's nothing.

It's just the new lifeguard.

He always buys gum before his shift.

Spearmint.

Has he asked you out yet?

Well, not in so many words.

Or in any words really.

I mean, you know how it is

when you really like a guy and he has no idea that you exist.

No.

I should go. I'm late.

You know, if you want him to notice you,

don't be there.

While he's chewing gum,

he'll be consumed with thoughts of you.

Where is she?

Why isn't she here?

Is she on a hot date?

Hunh. I never thought of that.

You may be book smart,

but trust me on this.

When it comes to things that truly matter,

like dating,

it's time for the pupil to become the pupee.

Hey, clones.

Is it true that you really live in the tipton hotel?

Yeah, our mom sings there.

And it makes your place look like a dump.

Yeah.

And are there really hot babes serving

ice cream by the pool?

3 flavors.

And we're talkin' 'bout the girls.

Maybe we'll, uh... Come over and hang out.

You wanna hang out with us?

Of course, he does.

You know, I've always liked you 2.

No, you didn't.

Ow! Quit it!

What's up?

So, um...Where were you yesterday?

'Cause, like, I was here,

and you weren't.

Oh, I was with--

be mysterious, aloof.

Torture him.

Someone.

Someone...Else.

Really?

Oh, so I guess that means

you wouldn't want to go out sometime?

How about tonight?

Whatever you do, don't look eager.

Not that I'm eager.

I'll check my calendar.

I'm free.

Excellent. We'll have dinner at the seaport.

Hey!

Oh. Hey, London.

Your advice actually worked.

Duh!

What advice?

I got a date with Lance, the lifeguard.

Oh! So what are you going to wear?

I don't know.

Jeans?

Why don't you wear

a sack over your head that says "loser"?

Come on. Let's go to the boutique.

Ohh!

Not bad. Not bad at all.

Check it out, crew.

All this stuff is free.

Free for our guests who spend $2,000 a day.

Do you have any hummus?

Ohh. Who ate all the finger sandwiches?

Who invited ringworm?

It's tapeworm.

Whatever type of worm he is,

please take him and the rest of your mongrel horde upstairs

and out of sight.