St. Denis Medical

.

- Standard practice-- initialing the site of injury

to safeguard against any mix-ups,

make sure we know exactly where--

Damn it. oh, Come on.

Oh. Out of ink.

You know what? Screw it. Left femur--I'll remember.

- You sure? - Oh, yeah, I'll just remember.

Left femur is right... for surgery.

And the right femur, not right. No, that's...

Okay, forget that.

I'll just lock it in.

Left femur, left femur, left femur, left femur.

Okay, it's in there.

Uh, and we're talking your left, right?

- Can you just get another marker?

- Yeah, can we get another marker in here, please?

- I'll have our cardiologist Dr. Axler take a look at it

just to be safe. - Axler's not gonna like that.

- Well, Axler's just gonna have to deal.

So tell me everything.

It started with tightening,

like someone was sitting on my chest.

- Oh, I was just asking about his weekend.

So did you and Michael have a good time?

Is he still a cutie-patootie?

- Sorry. Who's Michael?

- Uh, Ron's son. Michael is Ron's son.

- Ron? - Okay, excuse us for a second.

- I had a tough moment with Michael last month.

Listen, I wasn't the greatest dad.

Maybe I ran a little hot. I'm working on that.

I went to visit Michael in Austin,

and we fell into old patterns.

He poked me.

I took it to ten. That triggered him.

So this trip I am trying to remain calm no matter what.

And at the risk of sounding arrogant,

I am crushing it.

I don't want to jinx it,

but I'm working on the perfect visit.

I didn't raise my voice not once, not even a tone.

That's great.

- He's even stopping off for lunch before his flight.

- Well, it sounds like you're really doing the work.

- Yeah, not really. I just agree with everything he says.

He suggested we take this hot-yoga class.

It smelled bad and felt even worse,

but I was all like, oh, this is so awesome.

You know, when you're chasing the perfect visit,

it almost feels good to lie. - Is that healthy, though?

I mean, it seems like a bit of an act.

- Look, my son is sensitive, okay?

This is the easiest way to do this.

You wouldn't understand because you don't have kids.

- Well, I understand human relationships.

And let me tell you something-- conflict is natural.

You know, at Henderson family reunion,

the ham is a-flying.

But there's a lot of love there, a lot of love.

- Knife fight at a BabyGap. Ambulance en route.

Okay, thank you.

Hey, there's our civic-duty hero.

How was jury duty? Were any of the jurors crazy?

Everyone was pretty normal.

- Were you're not allowed to watch TV

in case they were, like, discussing the trial?

- Nope. - I have this fantasy scenario

where I'm on a jury, and we're really close to a verdict,

and then I say, hold on.

Are we thinking about this whole thing the wrong way?

This is someone's life we're talking about.

Did anybody do that?

- The case was about land easements.

- Mm. This is someone's easement we're talking about.

That didn't have the same ring to it at all.

[humming "Law & Order" theme song]

- Hey, what's your poison, compadre?

- Ah, just a little morning juice,

something I whip up sometimes. - Sip for the B-dawg?

Oh, yeah, of course.

Ah, let's see.

Whoa. Whoa-ho-ho.

That is tasty, man. What's in that?

- Ah, it's kind of a secret family recipe.

We used to make it on hot summer days on the farm.

- Okay, what you just said, slap that on a label,

and you got yourself a premium endcap at Whole Foods.

- "Endcap"? - We're talking sales, Matty.

Yeah, this could be a good business.

- No, come on. - Oh, I'm serious.

Uh, Keith, come try Matt's farm juice.

- Okay. Hope there aren't any tree nuts in there

'cause my throat will close up--

- Yeah, yeah, just drink it, Keith.

- Mmm. Yeah. That's numbers.

- Oh, thanks, man. - Yeah.

- How much would you pay for that?

- Oh, my gosh, Matt, I'm so sorry.

I didn't know-- - No, in a store, Keith.

- Oh, well, it depends how thirsty I am.

Middle of the desert, sky's the limit.

Middle of a lake-- - It's worth 8 bucks, easy.

I tried to include you, Keith. You saw that, right?

But these chances are gonna dry up, bud.

Yeah. Sorry.

- Buffalo Bruce and Matty the Kid

back in the saddle--

this time exploring a new frontier,

the food and beverage sector.

- Uh, my workstation's over there,

but sometimes I mix it up, so sit here.

Oh, that is not Michael.

That is not him!

How you doing, Joyce?

- Oh, my little cutie's all grown up.

Actually, my little cutie's keeping it tight.

- Joyce. - Hi. Serena, Ron's favorite.

I'm gonna need all the dirt on his place, like, immediately.

- Yeah, what's his kitchen situation?

One plate, one cup, one fork? - Oh, no.

There's a second fork...

from Sonic.

I'm not sure how many dishwasher cycles

it has left in it, though.

Dishwasher cycles.

Michael, you are hilarious. - Yep.

Don't own a lot of forks. - Shh. Keep talking.

Uh, let's see, first night, I sweat through my PJs,

'cause Dad keeps it a brisk 80 degrees in there air.

Ugh, like a reptile habitat.

Yeah, I turned it down to 68,

and, miraculously, he didn't change it back.

- It's nice. I wake up several times during the night.

And I say to myself, this is nice.

No, but it helps with the-- What were you--

- The brown fat. - Yes, I have less brown fat.

- More. - More, more, I have more.

Michael's got no shortage of opinions on my life,

but I've been handling it perfectly because of this.

I had to pull this out a lot this weekend.

"Nod and agree."

I say hot, he says cold.

I say up, he says down.

I don't know where he gets it from.

His mom, I guess.

- I'm so glad that Val's case didn't go longer.

We really need the bodies. - Mm, totally.

- You know, it's weird that I've never been summonsed.

- Is it? - Yeah.

I kind of feel like the city's, like, saving me

for something bigger, you know?

Like, they don't want to burn me on some nonsense.

Yeah, maybe.

- You know, I can tell when someone's lying.

It's all in the pupils.

- Uh-huh. - I'm serious.

If they look up and to the right, lie,

because they're using the creative part of their brain.

I wonder if Val knew that.

God, I should have trained her up before the trial.

- Dude, Val didn't have jury duty, okay?

She went to Cabo.

- What? - Yeah.

No offense to your pupil method, but...

It's fine.

- You're just being a lot with the jury stuff.

No, I get it.

- Hey. - Hey.

- Look what I drew. - Oh, what's this?

- It's the logo for my business.

Oh, your business?

- Yeah. - Okay.

"Nurse Matt's Tonic-- just what the doctor ordered."

- Pretty cool, huh? - Uh-huh.

Is there any doctor in particular that ordered it?

I don't know.

Just background. Doesn't really matter.

- Right. Right, doesn't matter.

Yeah.

- It's so crazy to think that someday,

like, millions of people could see this image.

- Yeah, that would be a very special thing for you.

Just you.

- I enabled two-factor authentication for you.

So now you get a text every time you try to log in.

- That looks very secure. Thank you for doing that.

- Hey, Leonard. Leonard, hold up.

You know that, um, angina patient

you referred to me this morning?

It's a good thing I did a complete workup.

Otherwise, I might not have discovered

a severe case of "drank too many energy drinks."

- Okay, well, given her history--

- Non-radiating pain, normal EKG.

- Okay, well, it was a judgment call.

There have been times where I didn't admit a person,

and I came to regret it. - Oh.

So I'm here to help you work through your previous screwups?

Hey, uh, tell Yang he's out of a job.