City Hunter Special: The Death of Vicious Criminal Saeba Ryo (シティーハンタースペシャル 緊急生中継!?凶悪犯冴羽リョウの最期)

You freakin’ bitchass!

What the hell!

We’re ready for the getaway.

Where’s the shit?

It’s right here.

I’m your new recipient.

The other guy is fish food in Tokyo harbor.

Like… oh my gosh!

Is this a traffic jam or what?

Totally uncool, dude!

Quit talking like a fag!

But…

Ryo-chan’s been hanging around babelicious high school girls lately.

Ryo!

You damn paedophilic pervert! You’ve gone too far this time!

I’m just kidding, woman!

Stop PMS-ing already! You’re screwing with my mokkori power.

I’m surprised you were able to swing that thing inside this small car.

I’ve got skillz.

It’s hard to believe that you’re one of the best in the underworld.

Well, you don’t look too tough serving coffee at the Cat’s Eye either, Falcon.

That’s just my cover.

Don’t compare me to this dorkass.

You guys are fighting again?

Miki-chan, why don’t you dump Mr. Clean here and be my partner instead?

Ryo!

You don’t need another partner, I treat you well, don’t I?

Sure…

Train #197 on Rail 18 will be departing for Okayama shortly.

All passengers for this train should now board.

Please!

I’ll give you as much money as you want. Just let me go!

You can’t bribe me.

You’re useless to me and the organization.

The boss says he is very disappointed in you.

Jesus, we’ve been stuck here forever.

Don’t these people have anywhere better to go for Golden Week?

There’s nothing we can do.

With this depression and all, Sea Firefly is the best vacation spot.

There’s an Umihotaru right here!

Look at it glow!

I’m called Umibozu.

Spare me…

It won’t be long now.

We’ve already started the television takeover.

Traitors like you…

… can watch us from hell!

Hey, honeymelons!

Can I get your number?

I’ll show you heaven at this hotel!

Hey, bring your DSL my way…

Wanna lick that ice cream off me?

Sure.

Wear it!

The sea breeze sure feels good!

Yeah.

A helicopter from MegaCity TV.

Oh, that station with The Naughty Jungle?

No, you moron.

The new TV station that media king, Jack Douglas, created.

Media King…

They say he’s worth a couple billion yen.

I want a couple billion yen.

Oh yeah!

Ryo, we can’t just hang out here.

It’s been four months since we’ve had a job.

We’ve broken our old record of three months and a week.

It’s a new unemployment streak!

We really need to find a client.

We need a client!

Good work.

Emergency Live Broadcast!?

The Death

of Evil Ryo Saeba

Subtitles by Team ABCB

Yes!

Finally, a client after four months and three days!

Good evening.

MegaCity TV presents Mega Pop News.

My name is Sayaka Asagiri.

All right! Saya-pii!

Go girl!

Hordes of vacation goers have flocked to the Sea Firefly today…

… the first day of Golden Week.

Here is some footage of the busy area from our satellite camera.

You can clearly see the traffic congestion around the Sea Firefly area.

Oh shit.

They were taping me?

I had no idea.

Those satellites can zoom in pretty damn close.

More news to come after a word from our sponsors.

Ryo, it’s me!

Open the door!

What the homie!

Sayaka’s sexy announcements just got ruined…

… by Kaori’s nasty voice!

Yeah, yeah.

I’m coming!

Oh…

… my…

… freakin’ God!

Ryo, we have a client.

My apologies for keeping you waiting.

He’s fast.

Come in!

Hey, wait!

Ryo, open the damn door!

Now, let’s leave that child alone…

… and enjoy this time we have together as adults.

Such a…

MOKKORI!

… woman like yourself…

… will be treated tenderly by a gentleman like myself.

Kiss~

I can’t even let my guard down for a second with you!

It so happens that this lady needs our help.

I see.

Sorry.

But, I don’t work for chicks who hide their faces.

Wait, Ryo!

This is our first job in four months.

Very well.

Sa…

Saya-pii!

NO WAY!

YES FREAKIN’ WAY!

Saya-pii, in the flesh.

Sorry, but I don’t think he can handle this job.

He’s a little distracted by you.

Heaven…

Heaven…

Heaven on legs!

Heaven on legs!

Heaven on legs!

Heaven…

Heaven…

Heaven on legs!

Heaven on legs!

Kaori!

You just told me to accept this job!

It’s been four months. We can’t be picky with the requests we get!

You’re right.

I guess it’s okay.

Now, for tomorrow’s weather.

But, wait…

Isn’t this being filmed live?

No, what you’re seeing now is footage from previous newscasts.

They edit the clothing and mouth movements with computers.

Their technology makes it easy.

Do you trust me now?

Oh hell yeah!

I mean, but of course.

So, what does the beloved newscaster, Sayaka Asagiri…

… need help with from a hot guy like me?

I want you to protect me.

Protect you?

Yes.

I want you to protect my life.

Hell yeah!

In the shower! In bed! I’ll protect you 24-7!

Asshole!

So, you want a bodyguard.

How much are you paying?

Oh, yeah.

I was thinking this would be enough.

Ten, hundred, thousand, ten thousand…

A hundred thousand!

WOO HOO!

Five zeros!

All right, Kaori!

We’re finally getting paid after four months!

And another thing…

My body is all yours for one night.

HOLY SHIT!

WHAT THE FUCK?

I hope you’re UP for it.

Of course, this is only if you succeed.

I’ll be UP for it all night!

It’s a deal then.

We start now!

Hey!

The Ryo Saeba Special, Lovey-Dovey Handcuffs!

There’s sponge on the inside so it won’t hurt you.

Now we can be cuddly day and night!

So, that’s what he was making this whole time he stayed in.

You freak! Take those off!

Can’t do it.

We seem to be stuck now.

RYO!

Gimme those keys!

Damn you! Damn you! Damn you!

Gimme those damn keys!

Drink this laxative, damn it!

Oh god!

Can you please just shit it out?

Are you done yet?

Nope, not yet.

Can you please hurry?

Nope.

Not yet.