The Old Man Movie (Vanamehe film)

This is a public service announcement produced by the Milk Safety Commission.

MILK IS OUR RESPONSIBILITY

Our cautionary tale starts in this charming village.

What a beautiful morning! But what's happening over there?

This is the top dairy farm in the county.

Мilk! Мilk! Мilk!

Everybody is waiting for the all-important milkman.

And here he is, the best milker in all the land!

Hello, everybody!

The village-folk lovingly call him Old Milker.

Old Milker, is the cow prepared for milking?

Ready for milking! Here she is.

What a majestic beast! And what a juicy udder.

Let the morning milking begin.

Step right up, there's plenty for everyone.

What a magical sight.

But what is this?

Just a few days later Old Milker is not there for the morning milking.

Where is Old Milker? - Where is the milk?

Where's the cow?!

Got you! Old Milker is hiding in the bushes.

Everything is under control.

Old Milker, what have you done?

Nothing to worry about! Let me just milk this cow real quick...

Catastrophe has struck our motherland.

But what caused this terrible accident?

Research has shown

a modern dairy cow must be milked every single morning.

Failure to do so will lead to terrible disaster.

Here's the one to blame. - Old Milker himself.

What do you have to say for yourself?

It was not my fault. The cow would not let me milk her!

Cows are dangerous. We need to destroy all cows!

Wow, what a loser. You are banned from milking For Life!

No! No! No! It's the cows' fault!

But... will we ever have milk again?

Fear not, little girl. We'll never give up drinking milk.

Yay, milk! Ha-ha-ha! I love milk!

Under the vigilant eyes of the next generation of milkers,

this catastrophe will surely never happen again,

because they know: Milk is Our Responsibility!

Milk is Our Responsibility! Milk is good.

Мilk is our Great Responsibility! Мilk is very good.

Мilk is our Responsibility...

I made a cow for grandpa.

This is the cow's head and when I put it on, the cow says 'mooo'

Oh. Оh no!

Bye-bye!

Oh no no no...

Aha!

LOOKING FOR WORK

Who is that? - Оh, kids!

Оh my!

Will you look at that!

You kids be good now... - Listen to your grandpa and...

Don't make any trouble. - See you in September.

Where could grandpa be?

Where-oh-where-could-grandpa-be? Shut up, Mart.

Where could grandpa be?

God you're annoying.

Believe me, you really don't want grandpa to come pick us up right now.

Mom said grandpa was in the barn for so long that he went insane.

You and Priidik have not been to the countryside, but I have.

There's all kinds of weird smells and animals and bugs

and grandpa will make you do terrible Barn Things. - Stop scaring... Mart!

Yay! Yay! Barn Things!

And you, Priidik. You're a big boy now. You'll be doing the grossest chores.

You'll sweat in the barn all summer while grandpa makes weird noises like that.

No he doesn't sound like that!

Rad! Let's check it out.

Аino. We are supposed to wait for grandpa!

Guys, wait up!

Аino!

Ouch! Okay, okay!

Hello, grandpa!

Grandpa, we're here!

Grandpa, are you doing barn things? Grandpa!

Cock a doodle doo.

Grandpa, we're here.

We're here, grandpa.

We're here.

I can't stop the milk. - Мilk!

I can't stop the milk.

It's squirting! Squirting!

What is this? Grandpa! Help! Grandpa! - Priidik is flying!

Оh lord!

Dear god! Life can be so fragile.

Grandpa was just alive and beside us, and now he's gone...

God damn it! Аinо!

You're a nerd Priidik! - I'll kill you, Aino! Come back!

Bye-bye!

Оh no! No! No-no-no!

What's going on here? Wow, a funeral.

Holy horse dick, someone is dead! That is so sad.

Wait a minute, something's burning.

What are you doing? What are you doing to me? I'm a young man. I'm young!

I'm too young. I still have so much to give.

I don't understand. Do we have to stay in the countryside?

Yes, Priidik, you have to stay in the countryside! You have to stay here for the whole summer.

The adventure is just beginning, Priidik. Yes, a great adventure!

OLD MAN CARTOON MOVIE

Priidik! We're family! Adventure! Let the adventure begin! OLD MAN CARTOON MOVIE.

OLD MAN CARTOON MOVIE

You wanna have my funeral, huh?

Can't wait to torch grandpa?

Can't a man die in peace in his own barn? Damn it who messed with my bucket?

How 'bout I come to your barn and mess with your buckets?

Damn lunatics!

Grandpa, I feel like you're not very happy to see us.

Oh I'm happy! But you interrupted my milking.

Is he going to spray us again? - I don't know.

No need to be scared. Step right up, boys and girls.

You too, fish-face.

Let me introduce you to: tail, horn, nose, foot, eye

back, stomach, udder.

Mm, milk.

Cow!

Cool.

What!? Stupid city brats with your smart toys.

No respect for real milking equipment. Give me that!

Well-well. Show me your hands.

Huh? Ok?

Huh, these are little city-baby hands. They won't last a day in the barn.

Here, this is a real man's hand!

All you know is your dumb gadgets. But this cow... this cow is Real!

Real smell of dirty hooves in the morning.

Real silky-smooth teats in my coarse hands. It's... it's…

What?

Мilk.

I'm milking.

Tasty milk.

Milking-time.

Well-well! Can't keep your hands off another man's teats?

I milk too. - I am the one who milks in this barn.

But I want to milk some more.

Here's the deal: In the countryside you do as I say!

Whatever. Give us our phones back! We want to play our games!

Oh you wanna play games? Maybe Piggy wants to play games.

Here!

Grandpa, what have you done? Are you nuts?

What are we going to do here all summer without our phones--

Leave your games at the barn door - This is the beginning of your real life:

The Milk Life!

Get ready for a real show.

Оh no!

Мilk! Мilk! Мilk!

Мilk! Мilk!

Give me!

Мilk! Мilk! I want some too!

Hmm... too much poop.

I'd like some milk please. Thank you!

This goes here.

Done!

I made a Priidik.

Milk, milk! No!

Оh no! Mart, what did you do?

Мilk! Мilk!

It broke.

Мilk!

It's my milk!

Amateur!

And these fools are praising him. That's not how you milk a cow!

Not how... you milk--

No! I hate milk!

I know how dangerous you are.

Yes, the villagers have forgotten.

They no longer remember how dangerous milking can be.

But I'm keeping my eye on you.

Just set a hoof out of that barn and you'll find me there waiting for you.

I won't let it happen again.

I will save you all from the Lactocalypse!

Looks like she's all tapped out. Only fumes left.

I didn't get any milk.

There-there, don't cry.

Tomorrow's a new day, with new milk. Damn milk addicts.

Time to crack open a cold one. Come to papa.

Super!

Priidik, you've got shit on your face.

I hate country life!

Priidik, my hands hurt! All this work burns my palms.

It's like they're on fire.

Splashy-splashy.

Oh yeah! Good idea, Mart!

Finally you're useful.

Heck yeah! - The cold water feels so nice!

Grandpa really treats his cow like shit.

Nice cow, don't be afraid.

Here!

Easy, easy now.

Isn't that better?

Let's go, Mart. Quit dragging your feet.

Good night, cow! See you tomorrow!

Cock a doodle doo.

Perfect!

Help, grandpa! Ouch! Help!

Louvre has nothing on this land. This view is priceless.

New day, new milk.

Come on, kids. Enough fooling around. Plenty of time for that in the evening.

Grandpa, there is nothing left to do.

We cleaned it all yesterday!