Wild in the Streets

I don't want to have a baby.

I never wanted a baby.

My mother said I might die if I have a baby!

- Please, come to bed. - No!

I won't do anything. I promise you.

I won't do a thing.

If it's a boy, I'll die. I'll just die.

- Honey, please. - I don't want three!

I'm tired!

He cried all day long. You don't have to take care of him.

I take care of him.

If you made more money, if you made a decent living...

He should have his own room. He should have a nurse.

We should have a maid.

No! Don't touch me.

Don't think I'm not going to tell him about men.

What terrible things men do.

When he grows up he's not going to manhandle...

any poor little girls!

Don't touch me there.

I want to.

Max!

It's dirty, dirty, dirty!

Dirty little girl, dirty little boy! I, your mother...

am going to scrub scrub scrub until you're clean clean clean!

Screw.

Everyone thinks it's freaky.

You'd like the covers taken off before the kids come over?

Can we?

- Who the hell pays for it all? - You.

- And whose house is it? - Yours.

Then let's go! Get the other side of the couch.

All right, son. One, two, three!

You get the other side.

- You're the greatest damn father! - Don't swear!

Are you out of your mind?

Get that filthy animal out of here.

Out!

Are you crazy, letting that animal in the house?

Are you trying to drive me crazy?

It stinks.

Whatever it is you're making, it stinks.

Your teacher said you could be a brilliant chemist.

Why don't you make perfume?

Like Max Number 5, or...

Ma Femme.

What is that?

It's LSD.

What?

What are you talking about?

You want some of it?

I'll give you the special mother's rate.

Mama's little helper, $1.50 a cube.

Yuck.

I've been saving for four months and I've got $800 stashed away.

That's enough to leave home with, right?

Where would you go?

What is that?

It'll blow your hand off.

You're really developing quite an imagination.

- What is it? - It's going to be a bomb.

I'm not going to let you watch television late at night anymore.

I'm going to blow up the old man's Chrysler with it.

His new car?

But Papa loves his new Chrysler.

More than he loves Mommy?

You bet he does.

He'd sleep with it in the garage if I'd let him.

The way things are going I just might let him.

Yuck.

Max, why can't you be neat neat neat neat?

If you really had $800, baby...

why don't you get yourself a personal maid...

and 400 bars of soap?

I'm running away. I'd kill myself if I had stay here.

I'd take you with me, but I can't.

Got something to say

If you all want me

Well today's your day

Just be patient, baby

Yeah, please do

Come right up, line up I'll get around to you

Good mornin', people

I dig free lovin' fun

That's what I'm here for

Show you how it's done

Come on and slack off boy

Don't you know that lovin's free

That's the way you got to groove on life

So come on and give your lovin' to me

Makin' love now, baby

That's my game

I'll blow your mind, baby

It'll never be the same

But it's a groove now, baby

Just wait and see

Come on and give your sweet lovin' to me

Free lovin'

Take your fill from my cup

No more waitin', baby

Others hang you up

Now you take all of my lovin'

It's time you followed me

I'm gonna do my very best

And you'll get it from me

By the age of 22, Max Flatow Jr...

now known as Max Frost.

From his palatial Beverly Hills home...

Max operates 14 interlocking companies.

A multi-millionaire, after taxes.

Sources of revenue include personal appearances, records...

and Max's own music publishing company.

A leader of men...

and of little girls.

One of Max's latest creature comforts...

ex-child star, Sally LeRoy...

24, vegetarian...

mystic, acid-head.

Max's entourage, always in residence.

Always.

Abraham Salteen, 20...

known as The Hook, Max's trumpeter.

Hey, baby. What's happening?

You know it's a good thing you play groovy horn.

- Hey, Max. - Yeah?

How many bastards you got now?

You mean kids?

No, I mean bastards. You ain't married yet, you know.

You mean kids.

All right, kids.

- Four he supports. - Yeah, but two I know.

Who wants to be uptight about it?

The two I don't know, their mothers eat brown rice and seaweed...

- and that don't cost... - Much.

Billy Cage, 15.

The youngest graduate in the history of Yale Law School.

IQ 186.

Max's business advisor, also guitarist.

You guys lay off my man.

'Cause he digs chicks.

You know, stuff that cop-out, right?

It ain't my baby, I ain't going to pay no $200 a month.

Stanley X, 21, drummer, anthropologist...

author of The Aborigine Cookbook.

Making it with girls only?

It's some kind of crazy throwback.

Fuji Elly, 14...

Japanese typewriter heiress and beach bum.

You're a minority, man.

You're groovy, but you're outnumbered.

Who in the hell is in the majority, man?

You read the papers, don't you?

Yeah, I read the papers.

You don't read the papers.

Yeah, I read them on Wednesday.

You know what I read in the papers?

No, but I know what you roll in the papers.

I'm going to tell you what I read in the paper.

I read that 52 percent...

52 percent of America is under 25 years old.

The rest of them, babies, they're the minority!

We're the majority.

Baby we made it

We're 52 percent

Yeah, we're 52 percent They got TV shows for us

We're 52 percent They design the clothes for us

We're 52 percent They play the songs we dig

We're 52 percent And we make big business big

We're 52 percent They know we set the trend

We're 52 percent And their economy depends on

52 percent, babies You and me

We're the power

We're the fashion in their great society

So come on brothers

And sisters

My troops, my people

We got something going

The whole country is our destiny

If we just pick our spots

We're going to call all the shots

Turn up the sound.

Turn up the sound!

Louder!

We're 52 percent They design the clothes for us

We're 52 percent They play the songs we dig

We're 52 percent And we make big business big

I think that's Max Jacob Jr.

That's a madman.

Max, that's Max Jacob Jr.

52 percent, babies You and me

But that boy's insane.

Max Jacob was insane.

I'm going to have my face lifted and my hair bleached.

And your hair dyed.

And my teeth capped. We can afford it all now!

And you'll get a top-dollar toupee.

We've got to look our best and youngest when we go see him.

See him?

Sure we'll see him.

I'm somebody.