The Crossing Guard

To lose an 18-year-old brother.

He didn't get a chance to graduate from high school. It was a blow.

It destroyed me. It made me feel like--

I was afraid to love anybody.

I was really afraid to let people get close to me.

I felt if I loved somebody,

deeply, you know, like I do my family,

they would be taken away.

I said, "Where'd you learn to do that?"

She said, "Practicing on an old flame since I was 16."

Look at this guy here. He's lookin' at me and beatin' his meat. I like that.

There she is. Right? Miss America, 1912.

lna! Let's hear it for lna.

Comes here every night, huh, sweetie?

Right. Let me have a kiss.

Bring out the broads!

Let me at him! Let me at him!

Somebody throw a net over this broad.

Did you see him kiss that fat fucker?

Steve. I'll always know him as 18.

He, uh--

He was killed by a drunk driver just a month before he was to graduate.

And--

It's hard when you have two policemen come in and say,

"Your daughter's dead."

I op-- I opened the door and I saw 'em standing there,

and I said, "Mandy's dead, isn't she?"

A mom knows.

All right!

Freddy, he's comin' over here. You better slide in... a lot.

- He needs half a booth. - Sunny. How ya doin', Sunny? Everything good?

How 'bout that? How'd you like to spank it?

- Nice! - Oh, yeah! But softly.

- Sunny, you had to spank that, right? - Nice.

My wife, you know Joan.

We got a step-down living room. It's like two steps down.

So the bitch don't wanna walk. She wants me to raise it.

She don't wanna walk down two steps.

I still have to get over that. It's something that...

-you have to work with on a daily basis. -it's not gonna come back.

It's just something of-- It's yours. It's like your body lost...

something inside, something of yourself.

I miss me.

I miss... me.

It's over five years now, and...

I look in the mirror, "Where's Bobby?"

I don't know.

My family drives me up the fuckin' wall.

I mean, they, I guess they still, they still think I'm me, Bobby.

But... they joke about it.

They call me... sibling number three, all right?

And... it's like a nickname for Bobby depressed.

It was my older brother Danny that we lost.

And...

he was sibling number one.

And...

they, th-they didn't--

Did they forget? I don't know.

I'm gone!

And--

I miss me.

So...

that's it.

Who's runnin' this fuckin' show?

- You oughta go. - What?

Go.

- You should go. - Okay, yeah. I'm gonna go.

Um... Freddy, can I use your shower?

Help yourself.

Jefferey.

It's five after 10:00. I got a window display of gray feIt. What's goin' on?

Mr. Gale, you took all the vauIt keys home last night.

- For fuck sakes. - I think...

it would be wonderful to put emerald pieces in front of the diamonds.

I trust your preference in stones, Jefferey, but...

I'm very busy, you know what I mean?

All the time, I'm very busy.

So, uh, think ahead a little bit.

I'm walkin' out the door, you're closin' up,

you don't have the vauIt keys in your pocket, stop me.

Yes, sir.

Emeralds in the front. Wonderful.

What's so funny?

What are you laughing at?

Ah, it's been six fucking years!

I mean, I have my son here. Can't I be happy?

I've never heard that word out of your mouth.

And in front of John.

Ma! I've been in prison.

Don't make excuses for him. Listen, do you still have that little TV I sent you?

- Yeah. It's in the box. - Oh, good, because...

I'm cleaning out the trailer for you if you want some privacy.

Oh, yeah. That'd be great.

- Or you could stay in your own room. - No, no, no. Trailer's great.

Because that's a good fucking TV.

Oh, my God!

Freddy. How's it goin'?

Roger. Good to see you.

Come in.

Uh, can I get you something to drink?

- Phil, yeah. Let me call you back in five minutes. - No, I'm fine.

All right. Thank you. I'm sorry?

Uh, no, thank you.

Emily really loved this thing.

We used to keep it over there on the counter.

Stretch her whole body out trying to reach it.

Last joint on her little finger.

What?

N-Nothin'.

Come in. Sit down, Freddy.

Boy. Tch.

You really look like a natural family. You could be their father.

Thank you, Freddy.

Spectacular looking family, really.

Um, what can I, uh, do for you?

I really came to see Mary.

Oh. Well, I don't mean to be nosy, Freddy, but what about?

Well, I'd really rather talk to Mary about that.

Well--

Well, well, well.

- Um, you sure I can't get you something to drink? - No, I'm fine.

- Anyway, I think they're here. - Oh, yeah.

Hold on, guys.

Hold on.

- Hi, Dad! - Hi, guys.

- Hi, Freddy. - Hi, darling.

- We've got a visitor. - Come on, Dad.

Well...

look at this.

My own kids call me Freddy.

- You look wonderful. - Wonderful, I think, would be pushing it.

No, you do. You look wonderful.

Thank you.

So, how's business?

So-so.

You know, it's a little jewelry store. What can I say?

It's business.

What about you? You still doin' the real estate?

Well, it's a tough market right now.

I'm still representing some properties.

But Roger's been doing so well, I've been able to back off some. Spend more time with the kids.

Oh, well, wonderful.

That's, uh, yeah-- That's, uh, really wonderful.

Um--

Um...

Mary, there's, uh, something that you should know.

It's the reason I came here.

- Freddy-- - I've got something I wanna tell you.

You made me a promise. I hope you're gonna keep it.

I made you a promise. That's one.

And I have great news. That's two.

Now, you gonna let me speak or not?

I'm sorry. What's your great news?

It's really great news. I mean, spectacular news.

- I'm tellin' ya. You wanna hear it or not? - Mm-hmm.

- Are you sure? - Yes.

- Are you ready? - Yes.

He's out.

John Booth is out.

I'm gonna kill him.

Get out of here, Freddy.

I'm not goin' anywhere until I see you courageous enough to tell the truth.

The truth? What truth, Freddy?

- You promised you wouldn't. - Wouldn't? Wouldn't what, Mary?

- Mention our daughter? Why? Because you'd blackmail me? - Blackmail?

If I ever, ever want to speak to the mother of my children,

I must never mention my daughter!

- Get out of our house! - This is my house.

By any natural law, this is my house!

If my children live here, my children,

then who's to say that I can't come here to see 'em any fuckin' time I want to?

- You had to do it, huh? - Nobody's talkin' to you!

- You want me to call the police? - Call whoever the fuck you want.

Where do you get off calling them your children? You haven't been a father to those kids.

- You stopped with our daughter. - Emily is her name.

Yes, Emily. Emily! And she is dead.

But I owe those two little boys up there all the love I've got.

And it kills you that I can give it to them and that you can't!

Freddy, I want you to leave our home--

- Tell the truth, Mary. You want me to kill John Booth! - Let go of him!

That's my job in life, and your job is to go on as though nothing happened!

- Let go of him! - Freddy!

Freddy, why don't you let me go? I'll make us some coffee.

Come on.

Coffee. Good.

I'd like some coffee.

Why don't we all just sit down, have some coffee and talk about this civilly?

Come on.

You know what?

I don't want any coffee. I--

I don't like coffee at all. It makes my heart--

- You just said you wanted coffee. - No.

You sure?

Yes. Uh... no.

I'm gonna go.

I feel good.

- He just showed up at the door. I didn't-- - Jesus, God, Roger.

I just want to say this.

I've done a lot of things for you, you know.

A lot of things.