How to Be Really Bad (Meine teuflisch gute Freundin)

Welcome to Hell.

Not the whole city. Just this tower block here.

This one.

You surely imagined Hell differently.

Maybe you believe the Devil is a guy with cloven hooves.

So, have we made the world more evil?

- How's the German market doing? - Excellent.

This is my dad.

POLLUTING THE OCEAN, CLIMATE CHANGE, HASSLING EMPLOYEES.

Plus 2.3 percent.

Especially in large cities, we are successful as hell.

- And in smaller towns? - Ditto.

Plus 0.3 in Villingen-Schwenningen, plus 0.7 in Oberursel.

How measly is that?

Minus 1.5 percent in Birkenbrunn.

Business sucks? Not my problem.

Well ...

Why does he only hire idiots?

Let me do it!

CYBERBULLYING, WREAKING HAVOC, ANNOYING HER DAD.

"My best friend is pissed off at me. Is it okay to bitch about her?"

"Why only bitch about her?"

"Spread nasty rumours about her."

"Pwn her."

Believe me, guys, when I get out of here,

I'll show you how to be really bad.

HOW TO BE REALLY BAD

Shut up.

Dad.

- What's this? - I'm taking a break.

- What about him? - He didn't want to take a break.

- He really talks a lot. - That's his job. He's your teacher.

- May I quit? - No.

Where did you leave off?

I was talking about the Deadly Sins

and how to use them to divert humans from the path of virtue.

Good.

Give me an example of how to use envy.

Envy works well with most humans if you use material goods.

Let's say ...

this designer dress.

Everyone wants it, hardly anyone can afford it.

I go shopping with some girls, make fun of their clothes,

and encourage them to ... steal.

And when they've done it once, they'll do it again and again.

Ta-da. They're bad.

What's not allowed?

Magic.

We're allowed to tempt them,

but humans must choose the path of evil.

Well done.

I told you. Now let me go to the humans, Dad.

Teenagers ...

You may leave.

Forever?

It's your choice.

Teach my daughter or dust files in the cellar.

I'll take the files.

- So, may I go? - No.

I'll get you a new teacher, a stricter one than that clown.

I don't want a new teacher! I need action!

I'm fed up with only being evil online.

Lilith, I'm telling you one last time:

You're too young for the work of the Devil.

- We'll talk about it when you're 18. - No!

Sorry.

Kids ...

Dad. It's me.

Listen: Let me go to the humans for a year, on probation.

I'll choose a nice place. New York, LA, whatever.

And I'll prove that I can be just as evil as you.

What the hell, how dare you?

So?

- What? - I accept.

But just for a week, not a year,

and I'll tell you where to go and which person to tempt to be bad.

- Only one person? - Yes.

- What's the catch? - No catch.

If you're really that good, you can stay in field service,

and if not ... you'll work in the cellar with your ex-teacher.

Forever.

- You'd do that to me? - I'm the Devil.

Deal.

Hang on. I'm from Saarlouis?

- Where's that? - Hardly anyone knows it.

You can explain any odd behaviour by saying you're from Saarland.

Can't I be from Berlin? Or at least Hamburg?

So?

Target person: Greta Birnstein.

Her parents think we want to move and I want to see the school.

You know the drill?

No physical contact, no compassion.

Be as cold as ice.

This is your Locknar.

Open it.

It measures the temperature of your emotions.

If you're not cold-blooded, its colour changes.

But it should always stay black. Then you're on the right track.

Okay, I got it. Where are we going?

A penthouse?

With a terrace and a whirlpool!

SINGING, READING, HOMEWORK.

- Don't you want to get out? - Seriously?

Hi! You must be Lilith. I'm Greta.

- I'm happy you're here! - We'll see about that.

Welcome!

Bad idea.

- I've got a cold. - Oh. Thanks for warning me.

Welcome to Birkenbrunn!

KNITTING, MAKING JAM, HUGGING PEOPLE.

- You must be Lilith. - Careful, she's got the flu.

I'm Sibylle.

Nice to have you here. We're so happy.

My goodness.

Bless you.

My husband grows the best fruit in Birkenbrunn.

You'll feel better in no time.

And if you like, you can call me Mum. Or Sibylle.

I beg your pardon? Neither.

I could ...

call you Mrs Birnstein.

Yes.

Just a second.

What a great start. I told you, no physical contact.

Couldn't you choose normal people? They're ...

so disgustingly nice.

- Let me see results in a week. - I can do this.

Hi!

I've got to go, or else she'll hug me too.

- Bye, Dad. - Bye, little devil.

My father ... is a little shy.

PLAYING THE GUITAR, GROWING COURGETTES, DROPPING BRICKS.

All right ... Careful.

- This is hot. - It looks delicious.

All of this has has been grown with love in our own garden.

Dad talks to the plants so they'll grow.

Sometimes he'll sing to them.

Wow. And do the plants sing along?

All creatures like being cared for.

What you give to them, you'll get back a thousandfold.

- Dad? - Yes.

Thank you.

What does the ant say as it shoots up the anteater's snout?

"Enjoy your meal!"

All right. Serviettes?

Is it good?

It's delicious.

Pumpkin, you've outdone yourself.

And which ant is going to help me clear the table?

Me! Me! Me!

I can take those.

That was your fault.

Yes. Of course it was.

- Oh. - I'm sorry, I ...

Oh no, these were Grandma's. I'm such a Clumsy Clara.

You're not a Clumsy Clara. Just leave it, I'll get a brush.

Some say broken dishes bring good luck.

- Are you always like that? - What do you mean?

"Oh, I'm so sorry, I'm such a Clumsy Clara!"

Why so calm?

My dad says, if you can't say anything nice,

you'd best smile and keep quiet.

- Have you got alcohol or drugs? - No!

What about your friends?

Are any of them cool?

Oh no, you haven't got any.

It's not that I don't want any ...

Nobody likes you.

But what do you do for fun?

Well, I help my mum around the house.

I sing in the church choir. I read a lot.

What else. Thanks, Dad.

Look.

Oh, that's beautiful.

And it's expensive. You'll never be able to afford this.

Of course you're envious. I'd be envious ...

No, don't worry, I'm not envious.

I'm popping to the bathroom.

- Have you got a boyfriend? - No.

You're lying, aren't you?

Definitely not, I'd never lie.

- This is the old ... - Wearing an oven cloth again?

- Mum made it. - Doesn't make it look nicer.

Do I look as if I'd ride a bike?

Well ...

How do normal people get to school? By taxi?

We can take the bus but ...

that usually stresses me out.

Stress is good. We're taking the bus.

Wait!

This direction!

You should have said.

Come on. Hurry!

Hi.

Hi, Melody. Hi, Daria.

Be quiet, loser.

Sure, no problem.

Whoa, what was that?

Melody and Daria. They've got a band.

- They sing really well. - Do they?