Bob's Burgers

- Whoa. - Whatcha reading?

- The Internet? - Oh, it's an article

about those doctors that go to war zones.

What, like, for vacation?

No, for saving people.

Just makes it seem like

what we do is so trivial.

Oh, not this again.

I mean, think about it, Lin.

What we do doesn't really make a difference to anybody.

What are you talking about?

We make good food, and good food makes people happy.

My God, is making burgers the dumbest thing

we could've done with our lives?

That's it, give me that.

No more screen time for you at night.

You get yourself all worked up.

Wait-Wait, don't look at the other tabs I have open.

I mean, I mean, not mine. Those were... pop-ups.

Oh. Oh! Look at that.

- Bobby... - Sorry.

So after that, I dreamt I was in a hot tub...

- Mm-hmm. Mm. - and then I woke up,

and I was in a cold sweat. You ever have that one?

- Nuh, uh, yeah, I think. - Okay. I'm coming clean.

I didn't really dream that.

But can you imagine how weird that would be if I did?

Hey, you guys need a hand over there?

- No. - We're good.

- No thanks. - You stay there and chat.

Oh, thank God.

Uh, welcome to Bob's Burgers.

- Hi. - Hi.

Uh, do-do you remember us?

I-I do... not, I'm sorry.

Oh, well, I'm Connor Coloroso. And this is Farrah.

- Hello. - And we had our very first date

here about three months ago.

Oh, uh, good.

Happy anniversary.

It's a funny story, actually. How we met.

We got into a fender-bender down by Wonder Wharf.

Speed Racer here clipped my bumper when I was parking.

It's true, Your Honor.

And after we exchanged information,

we decided to walk over here for lunch.

And I've been clipping her bumper ever since.

- Aw. - Hm.

- That's fun. - Well...

what can we get for you new lovebirds? A couple of burgers?

Uh, actually, we came to tell you...

We're engaged!

- Uh... that's great. - Congratulations.

I always knew you two would make it work.

Let's see that rock, girl.

Sorry, I heard someone say that on TV. I-Is it offensive?

We have a big question to ask you,

and we really hope you say yes.

Will you cater our wedding?

Us? Cater your wedding?

Don't take this the wrong way,

but don't you want your wedding to be nice?

'Course. But we're not really into the whole

traditional wedding thing, you know?

- Yeah. - I mean, we'd love to,

but we're not really set up for catering, per Se.

- Or very good at it. - Right.

And we sometimes use our kids,

which you probably might not want.

- What? We're great. - Oh, no, no, no,

we definitely want the kids as well.

Yeah, they brought us our burgers on that first date.

I have chills. Chills.

You should name your first baby The Belcher Children.

We really want this to happen.

Something that's meaningful to us,

instead of, like, a random caterer, you know,

with their chicken or their salmon.

That-That is kind of touching.

It'll be for about 50 people.

W-We could handle that.

And we're having the wedding by the water,

just outside of Bog Harbor.

Oh, o-outdoors?

Uh, I guess we could borrow a couple of coolers

and rent a gas grill.

Sure you can. They could cater your wedding

if it was in a ditch by the highway.

Hey, that's my wedding spot! Don't give it away.

So, when's the big day?

A week from Saturday.

- Huh? - What? A-A week from Saturday?

That's not a lot of time to prep.

We're both just really excited, and we don't wanna wait.

Right. What's the point of waiting?

Nobody gets better looking, huh? Right, Dad?

- Louise. - Sorry.

Oh. So romantic.

You know what, Connor, Farrah, let's do it.

- Great! - Yes! Thank you guys so much.

We'll call you with all the details.

- Sounds great. - Bye!

- They're never gonna make it. - What?

Y-You just said how romantic this is.

What else am I gonna say in front of them?

- What do you have against love? - Nothing!

How am I excited about this and you're not?

You love weddings. You love all this stuff.

It's just... three months isn't enough time.

People should live together for at least 20 years.

Uh, wait, what? 20 years?

Okay, fine. But-But three months?

You haven't been in a fight yet. And if you did, it was cute.

You haven't even smelled each other's farts.

You're still holding them in.

You farted on our second date.

Because I knew you were the one.

Sitting on my lap. Just for the record.

You loved it.

If that's all it takes, I'm married to Dad, too.

And to a bunch of people.

My point is, we didn't get married

three months after that fart.

Well, I think this is great.

The rest of us are excited for this couple, right, kids?

- Hell yeah. - Meh.

No, I'm nine.

I mean, our burgers brought those people together.

It's kind of beautiful.

Bob, you're like a greasy Cupid. Do me, do me next.

I've been trying for a long time, Teddy.

Now come on, everybody, hands in the middle.

One, two, three... best wedding ever!

No one said it. What happened?

You didn't tell us what to say.

Sorry. "Best wedding ever" on three.

Nah, the moment's passed.

I'll do it with you, Bob.

What? You're against this wedding.

I know, but I like to chant.

It's true. I got her to chant,

"herpes, herpes, hooray" once.

Oh, yeah, let's do that one again.

Herpes, herpes, hooray!

Oh, my God.

Okay, this might be the most important day

in our restaurant's history.

Our food helped make this wedding possible,

and now it's gonna make it a success.

If the marriage tanks, is that our food's fault?

I blame the buns.

You can't blame our food if this marriage doesn't work.

They're the ones rushing into this.

The marriage is gonna work, Lin.

Carter and Farrah have a love that burns brighter

than any of us can comprehend.

- Connor. - What?

- It's Connor. - Who is Connor?

- Carter is Connor. - Oh. Right. Connor.

Anyway, the grill has a grease trap that needs to be cleaned

before I return it, and since I'm gonna do

most of the work today, I don't think it should be me.

- Not it! - Not it! - Not it!

One of you kids is doing it.

I'm not greasing up these gorgeous hands.

- We'll figure something out. - Gene will do it.

- Bless you. - Whoa.

Pretty windy out here.

It's almost as if God is whispering,

"Three months is not long enough."

Say it, don't spray it, God.

Linda, shh. Here they come.

- Nothing! - Hey guys! Look at you.

Thank you.

I - I just said "look at you." I - I didn't...

Sorry, I-I'm nervous.

So, I know you said that whatever I came up with

for the burger of the day would be fine, but I hope you like

what I landed on... The "Ring-Gruyère-er" Burger.

- Like ring bearer. - Yeah.

It has Gruyère cheese and an onion ring on it.

Oh, my God, I love it!

And it comes with a side of Farro salad.

Get it? Like Farrah, but Farro.

- Wow. - Amazing.

Farro, Farrah. Oh, yeah.

And I figured we'd cook over here.

I don't want to get in the way of your crew

while you're setting up.

Oh, that's not a crew, Bob.

Those are all wedding guests.

We're having a very do-it-yourself wedding.

Oh, people love those.

It's DIY, but, you know,

we have the important stuff taken care of.

Your burgers and Farrah's grandma's cake.

Grandma couldn't make the trip, but she baked her famous

red velvet cake with cream cheese frosting for us.

My cousin drove it all the way here from Atlanta.

The lost city of Atlanta?!