The Big Bang Theory

T-minus 60 seconds!

Oh, it all comes down to this!

Oh, I've got butterflies.

Don't get soft on me, Hofstadter.

I will slap those glasses right off your face.

What's going on?

Hey. We're about to buy tickets for Comic-Con.

Oh.

T Minus 45 seconds!

They sell out incredibly fast, but as long

as one of us gets in, we can buy passes... Good Lord,

this is not the time for flirting! Keep it in your pants!

It's a whole lot of weird before coffee.

T-minus 30 seconds!

Oh, I have to go to the bathroom so bad.

Every year! I told you, wear a diaper!

And I told you I get diaper rash!

15 seconds!

Oh, this is it!

This is it!

: This is it.

Five,

four, three,

two, one.

It's live. Go! Go! Go! Go! Go!

Anyone in?!

No! Not yet! Nope!

Do not stop refreshing your screens!

Refresh. Refresh. Refresh.

Refresh.

Refresh. Refresh.

Refresh. Refresh. Refresh...

Yeah, this is not gonna be enough coffee.

Refresh. Refresh. Refresh.

== sync, corrected by elderman == @elder_man

ALL (slower): Refresh... Refresh... Refresh...

Refresh... Refresh...

Refresh. Refresh.

Refresh.

Refresh. It's been ten minutes!

We're running out of time.

To be cool? Yeah.

I did it! I did it! I'm in the queue!

And they say firefighters are the real heroes.

Uh, what number in line are you?

Uh, 15... Great!

...thousand, 211.

Damn! Oh!

Oh, they only have Thursday and Sunday passes left.

Really?

Oh, Thursday's gone. Just Sunday left.

Oh, Sunday's the worst!

Everybody's leaving, most of the good panels are over,

and the only T-shirts they have left are small and XXXXL.

Sunday's gone.

Not Sunday! I love Sunday!

So that's it? Everything's sold out?

Yeah.

I can't believe we're not going.

It's okay.

You know, there-there's always WonderCon in Anaheim, you know?

That-That's just as good.

: Excuse me.

Oh, guys, this is really sad.

And in a different way than it was 20 minutes ago.

I can't believe we wasted all that time on our Hulk costumes.

What? You were all going as the Hulk?

Not the same Hulk.

Ferrigno, Bana, Norton and Ruffalo.

We would have been the angry green belles

of the masquerade ball.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

And we're back to the first kind of sad.

Gentlemen, I have the solution to our Comic-Con problem.

We don't need them.

I'm starting my own convention.

Sheldon, just buy scalped tickets with us.

I told you. Buying scalped tickets is against the rules.

If you get caught, you get

banned from Comic-Con for life.

Life, Leonard.

You're gonna feel pretty silly when we're 80 years old,

and you have to drive me down there

and then wait in the car for three days.

Do what you want.

We're getting scalped tickets.

Oh, I already found a guy online who's willing to sell.

How do you know this isn't a sting operation

set up by the Comic-Con police?

The same way I know

that the people in the TV set can't see me.

Sheldon, just come with us.

You're not gonna make your own convention.

You know, there was a time

when Comic-Con didn't exist at all until one lone dreamer

with a unique vision made it happen.

And you mark my words-- I'm gonna rip that guy off.

Yes, I'm starting my own comic book convention,

and I thought that your client, Robert Downey Jr., would be

perfect to appear on our first panel.

Oh, well, now, why are you saying "no"?

You haven't even asked him yet.

You know, excuse me,

but I sat through Iron Man 2.

I believe he owes me two hours of his time.

They hung up on me.

Did you tell them th you're holding your convention

at a Marie Callender's,

and that every panelist gets a free slice of pie?

I didn't even get to that part.

Look, even your friend Wil Wheaton thinks

this is a waste of time.

Not true.

Wil thinks this is a great idea.

He was just concerned that he wasn't a big enough celebrity

to headline such an amazing event.

Also, that's the same day that he shampoos his beard.

Sheldon, buddy, I just don't think

this is going to come together for you.

You don't know that.

I still have plenty of solid leads on this list.

Good luck. No, wait.

I need you to call Stan Lee, Leonard Nimoy

and Bill Nye the Science Guy...

'cause, legally, I'm not allowed to.

Oh, and, also,

Carrie Fisher, you know,

'cause I hear she can be pretty nuts.

I can't believe

Leonard is spending hundreds of dollars on scalped tickets.

Last week, you spent that on a little dress.

Yeah, but those tickets only get him into Comic-Con.

That dress gets me into anywhere I want.

Those tickets were pretty expensive.

I had to give Howie an advance on his allowance.

Now he's never gonna put his toys away.

Why can't they do something sensible

like Sheldon and start their own comic book convention?

Also, who wants to throw me out that window?

Oh, while they're acting like teenagers,

we could do something grown-up.

Oh. You mean like a museum?

Yes, like a museum, but anything else.

Oh, I know.

There's a nice hotel not far from here

where they do afternoon tea.

Ooh, afternoon tea-- how sophisticated of us.

Oh, all right, if we're gonna be fancy,

I should probably put on clean underwear.

ee-da!

Look who has clean underwear.

No, we're gonna stop at Target on the way.

Hey, since Sheldon's not going to Comic-Con,

maybe we could find a cool trio to dress up as.

What if we go as The Fantastic Four, and just tell people

that the Invisible Girl is standing there with us.

Oh, and I thought our days of pretending

to be with women who don't exist were over.

Gentlemen, I am one step away

from securing a huge guest for my convention.

Does that step include chloroform

and a roll of duct tape?

I don't think that will be necessary

for Mr. James Earl Jones.

You heard me.

The voice of Darth Vader,

the Lion King's dad,

and FYI, the guy who says, "This is CNN."

Which also sounds like Darth Vader.

How are you gonna get James Earl Jones?

Simple. Earlier today, he Tweeted

that he's looking forward

to going to his favorite sushi restaurant for dinner.

I Googled an interview from four years ago

which was conducted in his favorite sushi restaurant.

That's where he'll be, and that's where I'm going, and...

And that's where

Darth Vader's gonna pour soy sauce on your head.

Sheldon, I don't care if you get scalped tickets with us or not,

but please don't be creepy and go stalking this poor guy.

You're gonna get in trouble.

You're the ones who are going to get in trouble.

You're buying non-transferable tickets.

And from a stranger, no less.

Not only can you get banned from Comic-Con,

if caught, you could be charged with petty theft.

You think about that while I'm warning James Earl Jones

out the danger of posting his location on Twitter.

He got lucky this time.

There are some weirdoes out there.

Okay, great. Bye.

Our friendly neighborhood scalper

says he's running late.

Does he sound like a criminal?

What do you mean?

You know, did he say things like,