Rizzoli & Isles

MAURA, WHAT TIME IS JANE'S DOCTOR'S APPOINTMENT TOMORROW?

I FORGOT TO WRITE IT DOWN.

I FORGOT TO TELL YOU YOU DON'T NEED TO COVER IT.

I CAN TAKE HER AFTER ALL.

I THOUGHT TOMORROW WAS THE FIRST DAY

OF YOUR SEMINAR AT BCU.

IT WAS, UM, BUT I REALIZED

THAT AS A DOCTOR, I AM BEST POISED

TO ENSURE THE QUALITY OF YOUR MEDICAL CARE.

Angela: YOU COULD GO TO YOUR CLASS.

WE'LL BE FINE.

I'VE GIVEN BIRTH TO THREE KIDS,

AND...

I'VE GOT ENOUGH POISE FOR ONE O.B. APPOINTMENT.

OKAY.

SHALL WE?

NOT SO FAST, PROFESSOR.

WHY ARE YOU TRYING TO GET OUT OF TEACHING THIS CLASS?

I TOLD YOU --

BECAUSE OF MY LOVE AND DEVOTION FOR YOU ABOVE ALL ELSE.

NOPE, DIDN'T SELL IT. WHAT'S UP?

I...

THE DEPARTMENT HEAD --

HE TOLD ME THAT HE IS SO EXCITED ABOUT MY SYLLABUS

THAT HE WANTS IT TO BE A COURSE FOR CREDIT.

OKAY, HOW IS THAT BAD NEWS?

I'LL HAVE TO GIVE GRADES.

YEAH, I DON'T WANT THAT BURDEN ON MY SHOULDERS.

I'M STILL SCARRED

OVER THE A-MINUS BIOCHEMISTRY INCIDENT IN 1996.

I CAN'T EVEN IMAGINE JUST CRUSHING THE SPIRIT

OF YOUNG, BUDDING MINDS LIKE THAT.

YOUR BUDDING MIND WAS HARDLY CRUSHED,

AND IT'S MED SCHOOL.

THE BUDDING MINDS OF TODAY WILL HAVE PATIENTS TOMORROW.

SO...GRADE HARD, SAVE LIVES.

MM.

HELLO?

YES, GOVERNOR. HELLO.

H-H-HOW CAN I HELP YOU?

OF COURSE I UNDERSTAND.

THANK YOU, GOVERNOR.

OKAY.

IF HE WANTS HIS NEPHEW TO GET AN "A" IN YOUR COURSE,

SAY NO...AT LEAST UNTIL THE SECOND OFFER.

HE WANTS ME TO FACILITATE A DEATH CERTIFICATE.

CHELSEA ROTHSBURGHER PASSED AWAY LAST NIGHT. CANCER.

I GUESS THEY WERE CLOSE.

WOULD YOU LIKE TO COME WITH ME, OR SHOULD I TAKE MY OWN CAR?

WELL, HOW LONG DOES FACILITATING TAKE?

IF I'M JUST SIGNING, 15 MINUTES.

YEAH, ALL RIGHT. I'LL TAKE YOU.

THAT WOULD BE GREAT. THANKS.

UH, YOU DO UNDERSTAND THAT THIS IS A FAVOR TO THE GOVERNOR.

YES, I WAS RIGHT HERE WHEN HE ASKED YOU A MINUTE AGO.

THAT MEANS NO "DOWNTON ABBEY" JOKES.

OKAY, NO PROBLEM. YOU PROMISE?

I PROMISE...

MILADY.

MM.

THAT'S A LITTLE UNNECESSARY.

OH, SHOOT!

WHAT'S WRONG?

I LEFT MY MONOCLE IN THE CAR.

YOU DIDN'T LAST 30 SECONDS.

WELL, WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO IF I GET SURPRISED?

NORMALLY, I WOULD GASP,

AND THE MONOCLE WOULD POP OUT OF MY EYE SOCKET.

VERY FUNNY.

BUT YOUR SNARKY REMARKS ARE RIFE WITH ERRORS.

IT'S YOUR EYE ORBIT, NOT SOCKET.

AND WHILE MONOCLES WERE VERY COMMON IN THE 1880s,

BY 1912, WHEN "DOWNTON ABBEY" TAKES PLACE,

UPPER-CLASS MEN WORE GLASSES DUE TO ADVANCES IN OPTOMETRY,

ALLOWING FOR BETTER MEASUREMENT OF REFRACTIONS.

SO THE JOKE IS ON YOU.

REALLY?

OH, AND THE REASON YOU DON'T KNOW THAT

IS BECAUSE YOU'VE NEVER STAYED AWAKE LONG ENOUGH

TO SEE ONE FULL EPISODE.

IT'S CALLED MEDITATING. IT'S HOW I FOCUS.

YOU'VE NEVER RESPECTED THAT.

THE PUDDLE OF DROOL MAKES IT HARD.

SHE WAS DIAGNOSED WITH OVARIAN CANCER TWO YEARS AGO.

IF YOU HAVE QUESTIONS, I KNOW EVERY ASPECT

OF HER MEDICAL HISTORY AND CARE.

THANK YOU.

AND, AS I SAID, I HAVE PREPARED HER DEATH CERTIFICATE,

SO YOU JUST NEED TO SIGN IT.

I'M ALMOST DONE.

THE PRESIDENT USED IT...

TO SIGN THE "NO CHILD GOES HUNGRY" BILL.

SHE WAS A VERY IMPRESSIVE WOMAN.

I WORKED FOR HER FOR 20 YEARS.

I'M -- I'M SO SORRY FOR YOUR LOSS.

Jane.

EXCUSE ME.

I can't sign the death certificate.

Well, there's a very fancy pen over there

if yours isn't working.

Her bedclothes are soaked with sweat,

and there are fresh bite marks inside her mouth,

indicating violent seizures.

I don't know how she died,

but I know it wasn't the cancer that killed her.

Well, then, you need to do an autopsy.

Well, in a perfect world,

but there are certain sensitive hierarchical issues.

Because Dr. Elbow Patches over there

is the Chief Medical Examiner

of the Commonwealth of Massachusetts?

No, wait.

You are. Problem solved.

DR. ISLES, ARE YOU QUITE FINISHED?

YES. THANK YOU.

I AM AFRAID THIS IS A SUSPICIOUS DEATH,

AND I'M ORDERING AN AUTOPSY.

YOU CAN'T DO THAT.

I AM THE CHIEF MEDICAL EXAMINER, SO I RESPECTFULLY DISAGREE.

HI.

I'M...DETECTIVE JANE RIZZOLI, BOSTON HOMICIDE.

UM, IF YOU'RE QUITE FINISHED, WE'LL TAKE IT FROM HERE.

I'M CALLING THE GOVERNOR!

GREAT!

DO IT OUTSIDE. THIS IS NOW A CRIME SCENE.

SEE, IF HE WAS WEARING A MONOCLE,

WE WOULD KNOW IF HE WAS SHOCKED OR HORRIFIED.

NOW WE CAN ONLY SUSPECT.

HOW MANY TIMES HAS HE CALLED?

BY MY COUNT, A LOT.

27, TO BE EXACT.

ALL RIGHT, WELL, IF HE HASN'T ALREADY

SENT A GOVERNOR'S AIDE OVER HERE TO SHUT YOU DOWN,

HE WILL DO SO VERY SOON.

SO YOU ALMOST DONE?

UH, YES. I'M MOVING AS FAST AS I CAN

WHILE STILL FOLLOWING PROTOCOL.

I'VE RULED OUT SEIZURES DUE TO HEART ATTACK,

EPILEPSY, STROKE,

MENINGITIS, ENCEPHALITIS, AND TOXOPLASMOSIS.

THERE'S ONE OTHER POSSIBILITY.

AND INSTEAD OF TESTING FOR THAT, YOU'RE GONNA BUY A GOLDFISH?

NO, I'M SETTING UP A VARIATION OF THE PYROGALLOL TEST.

OKAY, HOW MUCH TIME DO YOU NEED BEFORE THE FISH TANK IS UP AND RUNNING?

I NEED A FEW MINUTES.

OKAY. YOU GOT IT.

WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO?

YOU DON'T WANT TO KNOW.

JANE.

YEAH?

THANK YOU.

FOR WHAT?

THE...PLAUSIBLE DENIABILITY, THE SUPPORT, THE FRIENDSHIP.

YOU'RE WELCOME.

HELLO?

YES, CAN YOU CONNECT ME

TO THE MEDICAL EXAMINER'S OFFICE, PLEASE?

EXCUSE ME?

NO, I'M TRYING TO PLACE A CALL.

WHO ARE YOU?

REALLY, YOU EXPECT ME TO BELIEVE THAT THE GOVERNOR ANSWERS PHONES

AT THE MEDICAL EXAMINER'S OFFICE?

CHELSEA ROTHSBURGHER'S NET WORTH IS IN THE HUNDREDS OF MILLIONS.

HER HUSBAND, LARRY SR., WAS A FINANCIAL GENIUS.

HE STARTED HIS COMPANY WITH $1,000 AND A COPY MACHINE.

HE DIED IN '05.

USED TO BE KING OF THE TABLOIDS.

SO, WHO HAD EASY ACCESS TO THE HOUSE?

HOUSEHOLD STAFF AND HER TWO SONS.

WE'VE GOT UNIFORMS SETTING UP INTERVIEWS RIGHT NOW.

ARE WE PUSHING HARD OR HARDLY PUSHING?

UNTIL WE GET A CAUSE OF DEATH, SOMEWHERE IN BETWEEN.

Jane: OKAY.

JUST PRANKED THE GOVERNOR FOR...WHATEVER THIS IS.

I'M GONNA PUT CHELSEA'S HEART IN THE WATER,

AND THEN I'M GONNA REMOVE THE CLAMP FROM THE PULMONARY ARTERY.

AND IF MY SUSPICIONS ARE CORRECT,

WE'LL KNOW RIGHT AWAY.

YOU READY?

FOR WHAT?

TO BASK...IN THE WONDER

THAT IS SCIENTIFIC EXPERIMENTATION TOGETHER.

OR INDIVIDUALLY.

HERE WE GO.

OHH.

WOW!

WOW!

THAT IS...WOW!

YOU SEE WHAT I MEAN?

I'M STILL BASKING.

DI-- WHAT DO THE BUBBLES MEAN?

UH, WELL, FIRST OFF,

IN A KINETIC AND SPECTROELECTROCHEMISTRY STUDY --

NOPE.

UH, THE MECHANISM OF RED OXIDATION --

NOPE SQUARED.