Bob's Burgers

So, last day of school before spring break.

You kids excited?

I am. I mean, because you'll be working

in the restaurant even more.

Whoo-hoo.

Is that the sound you make when you're happy?

It's horrible.

This spring break, I want to finally earn

my Thundergirls Something Thunderful badge.

It's for "exemplifying the Thundergirl spirit"

with an act of outstanding generosity or kindness."

Whatever, hippie.

But I can't seem to find

the right Thunderful project.

I'm not going this way!

Come on, this is happening.

Police!

I guess you might call this badge my Moby Dick.

I'll call anything Moby Dick.

- Moby Dick. - Gene.

Hey, Gene, how's that loose molar?

You feeling like maybe today's the day, are you?

It feels pretty ready.

But it's got a mind of its own.

Ugh, I can't stand the waiting.

Let me wiggle it.

I saw her do this to a woman at the grocery store once.

It's Gene's last baby tooth.

When I get it, I'll have the full set.

Remind me again why you collect Gene's teeth?

You remember, when Gene was little,

he was scared of the Tooth Fairy.

You know, sneaking into his room at night

when he's sleeping, and taking stuff.

If that's what I wanted, I'd get an ex-girlfriend.

So Gene started giving me the teeth, and I pay him in kisses.

Rip-off.

And soon I'll have 'em all.

Ugh, I can't stand the waiting.

- Gimme. - Ow!

Lin, let Gene eat breakfast.

This is breakfast.

- Nom, nom, nom, nom. - Ow, Gene, ow.

So, where's everybody going for spring break?

We're going to a place where you can stand

in four states at once.

I'm gonna stand in California,

Hawaii, Canada, and Chicago.

I'm going on a road trip with my grandma.

She's gonna let me work the gas pedal

'cause she's too weak to push it.

My dad is taking us to Cooperstown.

- We go every year. - The Baseball Hall of Fame.

The what?

I'm going on a cruise with my parents to Turks and Caicos.

Oh, my God. Turks and Caicos?

Little bit of Turks, lot of Caicos.

And I'll be going to here-ish.

I'm trying to earn my Something Thunderful...

Oh, you know who's gonna be on my cruise ship?

BFOTs.

Boys from other towns.

Tammy, you're gonna smooch a BFOT

on the pointy part of the boat just like in Titanic.

I might also go to the beach and watch seagulls fight over bread.

You're not going anywhere?

You're so lucky you don't mind having a super boring life.

I guess I am. Oh.

I thought I liked bread, but those seagulls love bread.

Oh, my God. I think it's time.

It's happening.

My last baby tooth.

Aah, that's not a breadcrumb!

So that's the Tooth Fairy.

What'll I tell Mom?

Tell her it's gone to a better place... a seagull's butt.

There goes Tammy's cruise ship.

At least I won't have to hear her annoying voice for a week.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no!

Stop, stop, stop!

You forgot me!

Hey, Tammy, why aren't you on the boat?

I was on it, Tina.

I got on with my parents, they went to the cabin,

but I got off to buy lip gloss

because the boat didn't have my brands.

That's lip gloss?

I thought you'd always just finished

eating rotisserie chicken.

Daddy, it's me.

Tammy, where are you? The outfit I laid out for you

- is still on the bed. - I'm not on the boat.

- I'm on the land! - What?

I need you to march up to the captain, make your voice deeper,

and tell him to turn that boat around.

I'm not sure cruise ships can turn around.

They have to go around the world or something.

What am I supposed to do?

Um, swim for it?

It's that dot out there, right? You can make it.

- Who are you with? - No one. Nobody.

- The Belchers. - Okay, I'll go talk to someone.

You go wait at their house.

It's an apartment!

Oh, God. I-I'll call you right back.

Uh, yeah, yeah, Tammy's here now.

She's so here.

Here's our problem, Bob. The only way off the ship early

is by medevac, and I get airsick.

That's why we're on a cruise to begin with.

Can we get another round?

Uh, so listen...

we've called everyone.

All your friends and family are on different fun cruises.

- Psst, Tina, down here. - What?

Ask her to stay with you.

That would be generous and kind, hmm?

Are you freaking kidding me? She's a monster.

That's what would make it Thunderful.

- Then you take her. - Listen, kid, do you want me or not?

You know I want you. Stupid badge.

Tina, honey, who are you talking to?

What if Tammy stays with us?

- No, thank you. -Eh. - No. -No. - Mm-mm, mm-mm.

It's the only solution.

Dad, tell Tammy's dad we've got this.

Tammy, welcome to our home.

- Ew. - It's not a cruise,

but you might catch a stomach thing.

So, Tammy, a big extra special helping for you,

- our guest. - Nope.

Uh, what's the matter with it, Tammy?

Um, it rhymes with "schmeverything."

No offense, but I just don't eat food that's homemade.

Could we get you something else, sweetie?

Mm, that's okay, I'll just order in.

Do places deliver here, or is the neighborhood too dangerous?

Oh, it's super safe except for that huge unsolved murder

that's gonna happen.

- Tammy! - What?

Okay, every towel's on the floor.

Relax. You're out of hot water, so no one's gonna need a towel.

Where's the blow-dryer?

- Right there. - I was asking

for the person, not the thing.

Oh, your mom blow-dries your hair?

Only when my dad's out of town.

I'm not doing it.

There are too many tangles!

Use the detangler!

Ugh, what's "detangler"?

I hope these sofa cushions are comfortable, Tammy.

Oh, Tina, you don't have to do that.

Well, I'm just being generous and Thunderful, and...

Hey, hey, wh-what are you doing?

Uh, I assume I'm sleeping here

- and you're sleeping down there. - Then why'd you say,

"Oh, you don't have to put cushions down"?

I just thought you could sleep on the floor without cushions.

Okay. Um...

Tammy, how's your night-farting?

I don't night-fart.

Dad.

- Wh-Wh-What is it, Gene? - I lost my tooth.

Oh, that's good news. Lin.

No, no. I lost lost it.

Okay, uh, let's be calm.

We'll-we'll feel her out a little.

Maybe she'll be cool.

What? What's up? What do you want?

Uh, so, the Gene baby tooth collection...

Oh, you mean my perfect little Gene mouth in a jar?

Sometimes I talk to it. And if I bury it in the woods,

I bet a little boy would come up.

- (chuckles) What about it? - Nothing. - I forget.

Hi, I'm just taking a breather.

From farts. To breathe.

Yeah. How are we gonna get through this Tammy week?

Drink? Alcohol does not solve problems, Miss Missy.

It just makes them go away.

Guys, come on. We can do this.

It's only four more days.

Is this barf? Barf.

My show's on.

Why are you so bad at this?

I thought I was getting better!

- It's only three and a half more days. - No, enough.

We're gonna have a little Tammy-vention.

Tammy, can you come out here, please?

Okay, everyone stare at me.

You wear glasses?

No, I wear contacts, which I am out of.

So I had to put these on,

and now my face is totally Tina-ed!

Badge, badge, badge, badge.

- Tammy, we need to talk. - It's okay.

- I think I know what this is about. - Oh, good.

Being more polite and grateful and helpful.

I know you guys think you're doing your best,

but you could work on all three of these things.