The Simpsons

The Simpsons

D'oh!

Ripped By mstoll

Ha-ha!

And now let us bow our heads in silent prayer.

Maggie! That's not what you do with a hymnal.

Homer!

What? I forgot to floss this morning.

Oh, somethings wrong with Maggie.

We should get her to Dr. Hibbert.

But I don't see him anywhere.

The Hibberts now attend a more boisterous house of worship. (CLEARS THROAT)

Let the light Shine on!

From the lighthouse Shine on!

Shine on me Shine on

Shine on me Shine on

In the morning

This is awesome. Black God rules.

Shine on Oh, let it shine on

Um, Dr. Hibbert? Mmm-hmm?

I hate to interrupt while you're rejoicing but Maggie is terribly itchy.

Mmm-hmm!

Oh, this looks to be the initial stages of chicken pox.

Say amen! Amen!

Coat Maggie with this calamine lotion and the scabbing will heal.

The scabbing will heal!

The scabbing will heal!

Heal my scabs, Lord.

Praise the Lord! I can walk again!

Hmm...

What? My foot fell asleep.

Sweetie, I know it itches.

But you've got to stop scratching.

No!

No!

Here. Here, play with your teddy bear.

Sugar booger.

Aww, poor Maggie.

Homer, don't touch her. You've never had chicken pox.

I know. And you did. And you're great.

Oh, I'm just saying it's very dangerous if you get it as an adult.

It can leave you sterile.

Down there.

You always gotta work blue, don't you, Marge?

You're better than that.

Can't even go in my own kitchen.

Bet Bart's in there right now licking frosting off my eggbeaters!

Mmm. Don't worry, Dad. I'm saving one for you.

I'll just leave it here in the dog's mouth.

No! Bart!

That's a really bad storage area.

Hey, Homer. Why the sour puss?

Did you chug-a-lug a skunky Snapple?

I don't know. Maybe.

Plus, my wife won't let me inside

because the baby's got chicken pox.

Really?

Do you mind if I bring my boys over

so she can infect Rod and Todd?

Then there'll be a pox on both our houses.

Why would you do that? Are you a bad parent?

Au contraire, man with no hair.

You see, Rod and Todd could only get the chicken pox once,

and childhood's the safest time.

So you want Maggie to infect your kids?

You betcha!

In fact, some parents have been known to hold "pox parties"

so other kids in the neighborhood

can get the disease when they please.

And would they pay handsomely for the privilege?

They might.

You'd have to be awfully money-grubbing

to charge your friends and neighbors.

$15 to infect your kids!

Now featuring the pox box!

Pox box not recommended for pregnant or nursing women.

As with any disease box, results may vary.

Pox box!

Welcome to our pox party.

Save room for punch. Maggie's bathing in the bowl.

Hi.

Luann'll pick up Milhouse when the party's over.

I'll just read in the car till then.

Oh, Kirk. Come join the parents in the kitchen.

We're having alcohol drinks and dishing on the parents who aren't here.

Ordinarily, I'm not the one to laugh at a man's urinary blockage

but you should've seen...

Oh! There he is.

Ladies and gentlemen,

presenting the sister with the blisters, the tot with all the spots,

Maggie!

I feel like a chicken already.

I just made an egg in my pants.

Hey, Marge.

Hit me with a little hit more of that silly slush.

Chief, don't you think you've had enough?

I'm fine. Watch, I can even touch my gun to my nose.

Don't worry. I'm the "pief of cholice."

I mean, I'm the beef with no cheese.

Why doesn't Lou like me? Why?

Knock-knock.

Luann? What are you doing here?

I thought you were just dropping Milhouse off.

I could get some coffee and come back.

No, no, no. You stay. I'll just drive home.

Uh, who's gonna let me siphon?

Why don't you both stay and have one of my Marge-aritas?

All right!

I never drank one of these without a cigarette in it.

Now kids, in lieu of one of those inflatable jumping things,

please welcome Mr. Krusty the Clown!

Hey, hey, kids!

This putz only paid for 20 seconds so listen fast.

Moishe caught the chicken pox,

he scratched all night and day.

He asked the rabbi what to do and he said... (BEEPS)

Time! I'm outta here!

Kirk, you look good. Have you been working out?

Well, dogs have been chasing me.

No one's been chasing me lately.

What happened to your last boyfriend?

The one who would always go to the gym after visiting you,

then have lunch at that place downtown?

You know, his taillight's broken?

I'm not seeing him anymore.

Does that mean that there might be a chance for me?

Almost anyone's got a chance now.

Goodbye. Thanks for coming.

If my party made you sick, tell your friends.

Sweet Lizzie McGuire!

You think that's traumatic?

Mr. Stomach, are you hungry?

"I'm always hungry, now make with the pizza, fatso."

You're the stomach.

I have to do this for work.

So Milhouse walks into the bedroom

and there's his morn and dad going...

"Oh, Mr. Van Houten, I love when you kiss me."

"Yeah, yeah, kissing ladies is the best."

"Oh, baby, kiss my mouth."

"Kiss me like we're in a fancy hotel."

All right, we get ii.

Marge, what's happening to me?

Oh, Homie, you got chicken pox. But how?

I don't know. I kept away from Maggie all day.

Uh!

I'm so itchy!

Oh! Oh, yeah.

Son, we want to talk to you

about what you saw in the Simpsons' house.

Well, I didn't see anything to get my hopes up, if that's what you mean.

Well, maybe you should get your hopes up a little.

They're already up! They're sky high!

Your father and I are going through

what's called a trial un-separation.

And son, l want to make one thing clear.

Unlike the breakup, this is not your fault.

I can't believe it! Our family might get back together again!

Our house is a very, very, very fine house

With two cats in the yard

Life used to be so hard

Now everything is easy 'cause of you

And our la, la, la

I haven't daydreamed in color in so long.

Thank God. We were afraid we lost you, son.

You sit in this oatmeal awhile

and it'll send your itchies packin'.

Homer!

Mmm!

Homer oats.

Stop eating the oatmeal. That's the third tub you've eaten.

Y'ello? No. I'm not coming in to work. I have chicken pox.

I know I said that last month, but I was lying.

Jeez.

Right. Right. Right. Right! Okay.

Right. I love you. Bye.

I just got fired. Better check the want ads.

Ooh! Truck driver needed in Iraq.

Trucks are like big cars.

Okay, Luann, for honesty's sake,

we should probably talk about

everyone we dated while we were separated.

Well, the Sea Captain and I...

Yeah, okay. I don't want to know.

I don't want to know. I don't want to know.

So what are we gonna do as a family today?

Mini golf, pedal boats, indoor rock wall?

Um, Milly...

Botanical garden, build a bear workshop,

arena football with the Springfield Stun?

Not today, big guy.

Your dad and I need more time to get reacquainted.

Why are you laughing? Tell me!

Private jokes are rude.

Uh, son, here's 10 bucks.

Why don't you go to the bowling alley and throw some solo balls?