Love in the Villa

"The measure done,

I'll watch her place of stand,

and, touching hers,

make blessed my rude hand."

"Did my heart love till now?"

"Forswear it, sight!"

"For I never saw true beauty

till this night."

And that is why Romeo and Juliet is the most romantic

and tragic love story of all time.

Any questions?

Yeah. Cindy?

Can we go feed the snake now?

Okay.

And then it's reading time, okay?

Faster! Faster!

Life's a race.

So, how'd they like Romeo and Juliet?

Well, turns out Shakespeare is no match for a pet snake.

I appreciate you trying to expand their young minds,

but unless there's a very hungry caterpillar in the story,

you're pretty much screwed.

The kids wanted to know about my vacation,

and I couldn't talk about Verona without mentioning Romeo and Juliet.

Ha. You couldn't order a pizza without mentioning Romeo and Juliet.

What can I say? I'm a fan.

Yeah, like Kathy Bates in Misery was a fan.

Speaking of the trip...

...I have a... small favor to ask you.

- I am not taking Beatrice. - Oh, I don't need you to take her.

Good. 'Cause I don't do snakes.

I just need you to feed her.

- Feed her? - Yeah.

Feed her what?

A mouse.

- Ugh, pass. - It's frozen.

- How is that better? - Please. Please, it's just for a week.

- I don't know. - Yeah, and then, y'know...

Maybe take her, y'know, because she gets kinda depressed...

Okay, okay, okay. Fine, fine, fine.

- But you owe me. - Mani-pedis on me.

- The Korean place? - Done.

Okay. I'm only saying yes because you're finally going to Verona.

You've been planning this trip for years.

I'm so glad I waited. Now I have somebody to share it with.

I wouldn't be surprised if Brandon popped the question while you're there.

You really think so?

Yeah. He knows how much this trip means to you.

What better place to get engaged than the City of Love?

He has been acting kinda strange lately.

It's like Shakespeare said,

"If thou dost desire, thou must put thine ring upon it."

No, I... I think that's Beyoncé.

Fiancée.

So then I thought,

why am I checking TripAdvisor for restaurant recommendations, right?

So I wrote to Silvio...

Who's Silvio?

- He is our House 'n Host host. - Okay.

Yeah, and he gave me a list of some out-of-the-way places

that only the locals know about.

Now we can have an authentic Italian experience

instead of some Lonely Planet tourist trap.

- Cool. - There is some big wine festival in town.

So all the restaurants are booking up fast.

I went ahead and made reservations for lunch and dinner

every day we're in Verona.

- What? You booked 14 reservations? - Yeah.

Why?

- Do you think I should book breakfast too? - I...

Because I was thinking that we would have breakfast in the villa

so we wouldn't risk waiting on a bill and missing one of our tours.

What... What tours?

All of 'em!

Okay.

- This is... laminated. - Yeah.

So, I figured that we would start with the Casa di Giulietta

from 10:00 a.m. to 12:30,

followed by a tour of the Club di Giulietta at 12:45,

where we can, wait for it...

'Kay?

Watch as the secretaries respond

to love letters addressed to "Dear Juliet."

Wait, is this a pie chart?

Yeah, I wasn't gonna do a bar graph.

Can't we just... play this by ear?

Great.

And don't worry. This is just for Verona.

There is a separate itinerary for our day in Bardolino for wine tasting.

Julie, uh...

I also thought, instead of renting a car,

it'd be a lot more efficient if we took the train.

- It isn't working. - It is.

The rail strike is over. I already booked us two fast passes,

so we can hop on and hop off the entire week!

No, this isn't working!

Huh?

Julie,

you're great.

So great, and the time that we've shared together,

it's just been

so...

Great?

Yes.

Um, but... I think I just need a little time to think

because it's just been moving so fast.

- We've been together for four years. - Wow.

Has it really been that long?

Hi. How is everyone doin' tonight?

Welcome to La Sorte.

My name's Blake, and I'm gonna be your server.

Now, I see you're already set with drinks. Would you like to talk about the specials?

He's breaking up with me.

I'll be back with bread.

What about Verona?

I mean, you should go.

This was always gonna be your trip, right?

Maybe when you get back, we can see where we're at.

I already know where I'm at, so...

- Hi. - Hey, Jules.

How you doin'?

The same as the last time you checked on me

five minutes ago.

Yeah, well, I'm worried about you.

- Heartbreak is the worst. - Yeah.

How bad is it?

On a scale from one to Adele?

I'll be okay.

Really.

- Well, you can call me anytime, okay? - I will.

Love you.

Love you more.

Bye.

Brandon dumped her. You owe me five bucks.

Welcome to the Minneapolis International Airport.

As an important security reminder...

It's okay.

Attention, Amore Airlines now boarding flight 816 to Verona.

That's us.

That's us!

Sorry.

Well, looks like it's you and me.

Taxi.

Taxi! Hi!

Taxi!

Taxi!

Signorina.

Uh, you an Uber?

I am Uberto.

Ah.

Close enough.

Ooh!

Whoo!

Whee!

- First time in Italy, bella? - Yeah.

And I was hoping my vacation would make it past the airport.

Where you come from, signorina?

- Minneapolis. - Ah, Mini Naples?

No, no, no. Minneapolis.

Sì. Mini Naples.

- Mini Napoli. Mini Napoli, no? - Yeah, fine. Yeah.

Fine.

Fine, fine, fine, fine. Yeah. Just mini Naples.

Ooh!

Uberto!

There's a car!

Scooter!

Whoo!

You try some cannoli, bella?

Ooh, uh...

- Can you just keep your eyes on the road? - Mia mamma make this from scratch.

Uberto!

It's my mamma recipe and the best cannoli of all Veneto.

The secret is the ricotta.

Thank you.

Ciao, bella.

Did you see this painting there? It's so good.

Hmm.

Mm.

Of course.

Ugh.

Ew.

Excuse me.

Hey, excuse me. Excuse me.

Easy, yes. Who's a nice kitty?

Wow.

- Bloody hell! - Who are you?

- Who am I? - What are you doing?

I'm sorry. Are you insane? You've just walked in here.

Wait. Jesus, what...

Uh, no. No.

I rented this villa for the week.

Look. I'll prove it to you. See?

Julie Hutton, House 'n Host.

Confirmation code, HZ4RB6.

La Villa Romantica.

April 9th through April 16th.

Nice to meet you. Charlie Fletcher.

Vacay-n-Stay.

Confirmation code, 214TRSP.