Hart of Dixie

- I'm so sorry about Lavon. How are you? - Fine as I can be,

given that my heart is crushed

and I'm probably gonna die alone and whatnot.

Meet me brothers, Rudy, Rocket,

and the scruffy one's Chicken.

I love my brothers, but chaos follows them.

"We have your friend. Ha-ha-ha, the Truitt brothers."

You got my boyfriend kidnapped.

We're looking at a top-to-bottom right here.

Duke said that the remodel is going to take two months!

I'm not leaving just yet.

Joel and I need to get his book sold to Hollywood.

Okay, truth... I rejoined the Belles.

I'm not dating just Carter, I'm also dating Grandma Bettie's chauffeur.

I believe you have two boyfriends.

And it is amazing.

Lemon, would you care to tell us what's going on here?

I've been seeing both of you.

What are we gonna do? I mean,

I can't choose just one of you.

You, Limón, are worth it to fight.

May the better man win.

My life is all about Carter and Enrique.

Right now I have no time to breathe.

Until you start dating two guys, your time-management skills

haven't truly been tested.

- You should sew that on a pillow. - A.B., this is

a big responsibility.

- This decision could impact the rest of my life. - Is it possible

you're putting too much pressure on...

Okay, I was born

and bred to date a Carter Covington, right?

- Okay. - But Enrique,

I mean, Enrique is...

he's introducing me to all new cultures, to the arts,

uh, words I don't understand

and probably never will.

Okay, I get it. I do.

But... in the long run, dating two guys

is unsustainable.

You need to have an endgame. I mean,

wh-what is the plan?

Well, I mean, the plan is to date... both of them

until the universe nudges me in the right direction.

It should be illegal

for two such beautiful women

- to have breakfast outside. - Oh...

aren't you just full of charm.

I was window-shopping, and I saw an item

that just spoke your name.

Well, I hope it's not a sidewalk painting,

because she's already got one! Ooh.

Oh, Carter!

Anyone can buy love.

Enrique here is making art out of nothing.

Don't hate 'cause he's got money... Carter here

- is a romantic. Carter's just a rich boy.

It don't take no talent to pull money out of your wallet.

What do you know about talent?

Attention, people of bluebell,

Lavon Hayes has an important announcement.

Yeah, and that is my cue to leave.

Only two days left to get your tickets to bluebell's

Renaissance Faire.

- Two days. - Again with

- the Renaissance Faire! - I thought he said

- it was something important. Delma, I know

you ain't bought your tickets yet.

Sal? Sal? Renaissance Faire, come on, man!

All-you-can-eat mutton.

Renaissance fever... catch it!

I'm sorry.

I just, I thought you would be happy.

How would this make me happy?!

Well, because I, I got

three plumbers for the price of one.

And plus their anecdotes are

totally informing my new book.

Uh, hello? Could you please focus on this?

I'm sorry, Bets keeps e-mailing me from L.A.

It looks like your mom really got the ball rolling.

I got three studios bidding on The Cicada's Lament.

And she thinks it's gonna sell today.

Oh, that is great.

But you know, honey, just don't get your hopes up.

Ah!

I know, I know, I know, you're right.

But I just...

I don't know I got, I got to say

even when I was writing it, I really, I really

thought that it could be a movie.

Well, yes, so could this.

But they already made it

with Larry, Moe and Curly.

Can you tell what I had for breakfast?

Sounded like pizza!

- That's it! - Is that it?

I got it right?

Why are you on a ladder?

Why do you think?

To get to the pipes for the upstairs bathroom?

Why don't you go upstairs

to get to the upstairs bathroom?

You can't go upstairs because pipes are under the floor!

Listen, lady, we don't come down

to your doctoring room and tell you how to amputate.

Good one!

That's gonna hurt.

We need to talk about tomorrow.

Don't worry about a thing, all right?

I understand the importance of a three month anniversary

and as such,

I have secured a yacht,

and a captain,

for a moonlight cruise

of Mobile Bay.

Okay, so that sounds like the best possible

three month anniversary ever.

And I can't believe I have to postpone.

Seriously?

Yeah, my entire roster

of babysitters bailed.

I don't know what the deal is.

Look, I got two words for you.

Rose Hattenbarger.

- Is that a made-up person? - No!

No, she's like a certified, professional, five-star

babysitter.

I know because she's been leaving her flyer up

on my bulletin board since she was, like, ten years old.

Go ahead, look.

- Okay. - I'm serious.

All right.

Listen, bucko, your reign of terror...

it ends now, okay?

Tomorrow night you're gonna be an absolute angel.

You understand me?

What if I'm not?

All right, well,

your pupils aren't dilated.

No bruising.

I want you to close your eyes and tell me

the months of the year backwards... start with December.

R-E...

December, November...

He couldn't do that before he fell off the ladder.

Nobody can. If that's the test

for a concussion, I'm pretty sure we've all got concussions.

Does it start with the letter "M"?

Your brother's gonna be just fine.

Hey, you hear that, Chicken?

You gonna live.

Forever?

Why don't you get some rest?

And try to avoid any additional trauma

to the head the next couple of days.

- Okay? - All right, you got it.

Ow! (SHRIEKS) Geez!

Son of a biscuit!

Joel!

I'm just kidding!

That was my hand!

That was my hand.

Oh!

We'll see you later.

- Joelle! - Oh, God, thank you.

Uh, Zo... Zoe?

Um, so I just got off the phone

with Bets.

It's done.

Warner Bros. Bought my book for six figures!

Get out of here!

I know!

That's awesome! Holy crap!

I heard you talking... congratulations.

Also, what time y'all want us back?

At your house?

To finish plumbing?

- I think we're good for now. - We don't.

N-No, no, no!

Bluebell loves town events.

Yes, we do.

But I think we're suffering from festival fatigue here.

I mean, besides Lemon's multiple welcome home parties,

we've had, let's see, Jazz Fest.

We had Fusion Fest.

We had Sandwich Fest.

Uh, uh,

Alabama's largest BLT.

- Pickle Fest. - Okay, fine, you...

Maybe I've been feeling an abundance of town spirit.

Or a desire to distract yourself from your breakup.

Okay, okay, fine.

You got to help me with this Renaissance Faire.

Look, I am on the hook for costumes, animals,

food, booze, musicians.

Renaissance-style Porta Pottis.

All nonrefundable.

Okay, you know what you need?

You need a-a headliner.