Kings Go Forth

Bonjour, madame.

Bonjour, monsieur. Bonjour.

Vive l'Amerique.

Vive la France.

Vive le President Roosevelt.

Vive Le General de Gaulle.

Vive le Radio City Music Hall.

Vive Les Folies Bergere.

First time I saw him, we'd stopped off in a little town

in the mountains of Southern France.

Up north, at the time, they were liberating Paris.

That was the big war, the glamour war.

The one they were taking all the pictures of and writing all the words about.

But we had our own war,

And they weren't writing many words or taking many pictures.

We'd landed near Saint-Tropez.

There wasn't much resistance on the beaches,

not at all like the day we got to Sicily or Salerno, or...

Oh, yeah, Anzio.

We started north, and once in a while the Germans loped over an 88,

and once in a while somebody was killed.

Sometimes it was a friend.

He was one of a truckload of replacements,

and at first they looked like any bunch of new guys...

Too young, too clean and too polished.

And they all looked scared...

Except him.

He wasn't scared.

He was the kind of a guy you'd notice.

You know, take any group of guys,

there's always one that stands out.

Attention!

Any of you guys know how to operate a radio?

Yes, sir. I do, sir.

Okay, the rest of you guys can knock it off.

What's your name, soldier?

Technician 5th grade Britt Harris, sir.

Let's see your Form 20.

Yes, sir.

Uh-huh.

Graduate of Culver Military Academy, attended Virginia Military Institute,

Penn State, Colgate and Cornell.

I never met a guy who went to four colleges before.

How come you're not an officer?

Uh, it's rather difficult to explain, sir.

Try.

I wanted to serve with the men, sir.

Would you like to try that again?

Well, there are a few people I wanted to prove a few things to, sir.

You got anxious a little late.

You been in the Army eight months, we've been overseas 20 months.

I was deferred, sir, because of my job.

Yeah, "General Manager of the Harris Woolen Mills, Newark, New Jersey."

You're named Harris and the mill's named Harris. Coincidence, huh?

My father, sir.

That's pretty smart of you to pick an old man

who owns a textile mill.

Only one?

Four, sir.

My old man was in business, too.

Ran a little candy store in New York.

123rd Street, near 8th Avenue.

He used to ask me to help him out once in a while when he had a run on bubble gum.

You run that radio right, and we'll get along fine.

If you don't, I'll boot your tail up around your neck.

Comprenez?

Yes, sir.

Wait around here and I'll check you in with the room clerk.

Does the, uh, Lieutenant wish me to carry these, sir?

The Lieutenant wishes for you to knock off that stateside chicken!

I needed someone to do Wiley's job.

He was one of the men we left behind on the beach.

All right, dream boy, up and at 'em!

Come on, I got a new radio operator.

Check him in.

The artillery makes the replacements.

Why don't you let the artillery make the repl...

They make 'em. Why don't you let them?

I mean, you know how the old man...

Shut your big, fat mouth and grab a pencil. Come on!

That's not a nice way to talk, you know that.

Not a nice way to talk for someone who was just made an officer

and a gentleman, sir.

This guy's from Newark, too. Do you know him?

Ho, ho.

No, I... Well, we're not exactly buddy-buddies, but I know about him.

Yes, sir, "Corporal Britt Harris.

"Army serial no. 33170247."

You've got yourself a real doozy this time, Lieutenant.

Would you like to explain that, Corporal?

You mean a "doozy"?

Mm-hmm.

Well, a doozy, in this case, is a celebrity.

I mean, Mr. Britt Harris was quite a celebrity up around our way.

It seems

that a member of the draft board, of Harris' draft board,

just happened to be working in a factory that Harris just happened to be running.

He tried to bribe him, he gave him a Chevrolet.

I would've held out for a Cadillac.

Naturally.

What then... What happened then?

Well, he had to enlist. In a hurry.

Huh.

Thanks, Corporal.

You're welcome.

Oh, uh... Corporal,

you will keep this to yourself, won't you?

Tear out the fingernails, sir. Tear out the fingernails.

And a very sanitary measure it would be, too.

Don't worry about me, Sam, Lieutenant, sir. You know me, sir.

Big mouth!

Je parle le francais un petit peu, but I'd like to borrow your eggs.

Oh!

Les oeufs, monsieur?

Yeah, I'll take one, two...

Yes.

I never told him I knew, but I kept an eye on him.

You see, in our outfit we had to get along.

We were a forward observation team.

We lived in each other's pockets.

Oh.

Hey, Harris.

Bye-bye.

What are those?

Les oeufs.

Did you pay for them?

No, sir. That woman gave them to me.

Why?

I don't know why, sir, but women are always giving me things.

Let me see now, that'll be one for Rogers,

one for Harmer,

one for Breglio,

and one for...

No, two for me.

I keep forgetting I'm an officer now.

Yeah, that about leaves one for you, right?

Right.

I guess I gave him a rough time, all right.

Partly because I didn't trust him,

and partly because he was born rich and handsome,

and I was born poor and not handsome.

You guys met Harris yet?

Uh-huh.

Yeah.

I understand he got sort of held up getting in the army.

We had a couple of dry runs today. He's pretty good with a radio.

So was Wiley.

Land mines!

Land mines!

Get the medics up here on the double!

It's those replacements. They went into that other orchard.

I thought everybody knew that place was loaded with mines!

It was marked! I know it was marked!

Shut up, you guys! Shut up.

My God, Mama! Oh, my God, Mama!

Everybody knew it was mined. Everybody should've known it was mined!

You men in there,

don't move an inch, you'll touch off some more mines!

Stay right where you are!

Oh, God, Mama!

Get the P and A men up here on the double. Tell 'em to bring their detectors.

Oh, God, Mama!

Oh, God, Mama!

Oh, God, Mama!

Oh, God, Mama!

Oh, God, Mama!

You, stop! Hold it there!

Don't move, you'll touch off more mines!

They're all in here in close order.

Tell the medics to take a bearing on my clothes.

One was dead, two had lost legs, five were hospital cases.

You're quite a guy, Corporal.

Yes, sir, a real live hero.

You want me to pin the medal on you now, or you wanna wait for the General to do it?

Well, I figured speed was essential, sir.

You ever hear of a little gadget called a mine detector?

Answer me.

Yes, sir.

Didn't you hear me holler for you to stop when you went in there?

Oh, no, sir.

That's too bad.

You got a razor blade in your gear?

Yes, sir.

Then use it to cut off your stripes,

Private Harris.

'Morning, sir.

'Morning, Sam.

Find yourself a place to sit.

I'm, uh, not going to try to persuade you

not to yank this man's stripes,

but I thought maybe you'd fill me in on just what happened.

Nothing much happened, Colonel.

It's just that I hollered at him to stop and he didn't obey orders. That's all.

I can recall a couple times when you didn't hear an order.

I wouldn't have gone in there. Would you?

You kiddin'? We got too much sense.

Yeah.

You know, I can't quite figure this kid.

Maybe you don't have to. No, thanks.

Sam, don't ride the man so hard.