10 Items or Less

Sorry, what was your name again?

Packy.

- Packy? - Yeah.

Are we lost, Packy?

Damn it! Damn it!

I had this nailed before, I swear.

Dude, we're gonna find it. Don't worry about it.

So you're driving for the picture?

Donny's my cousin. You know, Donny?

Ah, yeah.

I'm kind of like the all-purpose kind of guy.

-Your cousin? -Yeah.

And this is his first picture.

Yeah, yeah, you know.

Like, I guess that thing we did

in Bartoli's backyard doesn't count.

Yeah, this is like his first film.

Movie.

Is he good with actors? Does he like actors?

You know, you're kind of like

the first actor I've ever met, so...

But I know he's fucking so psyched

that you're doing this.

You're playing the store manager.

Well, now, I haven't committed yet.

This is just research, you know?

Just... take a look at the location.

Research, get a feel for the character.

Hey, so Donny says you haven't worked in, like,

four years or something like that.

Well, not four.

It's a long fucking time, right? I mean...

Well, I mean, you know, I-I've had--

I mean, it's not like I haven't had offers.

So you're back! You're fucking back in business.

How does it feel?

Well, I wouldn't exactly call this "back."

I mean, not "back" back, you know?

Not like "comeback" back.

It's just a little independent thing.

Oh.

Nicely under the radar, you know.

I mean, if it flies, fine.

And if it doesn't, it won't even count.

It's like a blow job.

Yeah, like a cinematic blow job.

No shit.

All right, this is so...

This is so fucking uncool, I know,

but I'm driving, so fuck it, I mean--

Hey, would you mind just doing a little bit for me?

Any part. Any part is fine.

I have no idea what you're talking about.

The thing-- The book on tape?

You did this so well. Come on. Any-- Any part.

Anything, really.

Uh, no, no, no...

Chapter four...

Wait, wait.

...her ivory hand grasped firmly,

the door swung open with the hush of luxury.

And there...

-I never did a book on tape. -Shh! Here you go.

...her brim swept up, her eyes filled with the glory,

the spectacle that was Titanic.

Man.

That's not me.

Modest motherfucker.

-I'm telling you, it's not me. -Modest.

Of course it's you.

What else you been doing for the past four years?

That's not me, man.

All right, all right, first of all...

...I would-- I would never--

I would never go that way.

I would never choose those rhythms.

You know what I'm saying?

You get a scene like that,

you don't drop into those rhythms.

You don't-- You don't play the obvious.

You always go under.

Run it by me again.

-You want to play it again? -Yeah. Yeah.

Her brim swept up, and her eyes filled--

No, see, he's all caught up in his reading.

Shit, he's totally disconnected.

I wouldn't-- I wouldn't have a--

"Earth received her step.

Brim up,

her eyes encompassed the glory,

the spectacle,

that was Titanic."

Oh, my God! What?

So this is...

Ground zero.

You going to remember how we got here?

Yeah, I'm down with the map, so it's no big deal.

So how do you want to...?

How do you want to handle this?

Sneak me in through the back, maybe?

For what?

This is fine.

So how long you need?

You don't stay?

No, I run.

Fricking Porta Potties in Brea, wherever the heck that is.

You remember which way we...?

No, I'm just--- I'm fucking with you, man.

I'm just-- It's a joke.

All right. All right.

An hour or so should do it.

Okay.

Now, you will be coming back?

Yeah. Yeah.

Hey, good field trip, all right?

And, man, seriously...

Put it back.

Yes, you. Put it back.

You're not going to take it. You never do.

Stop squeezing the shit out of it and put it back.

I'm watching you, cabrón.

You going to pick it, or do I?

Your mama didn't teach you how to count?

Let's go. Let's go.

Fine. More for me.

Lee.

Come on.

$16.60.

Get a milk.

Vamos.

Oh. Oh...

Shit.

Lee!

Can you not do that?

Sorry. I was just...

Watching, I know. I saw you come in.

Is this bothering you?

I mean, am I bothering you standing here?

You are three feet from my face.

Oh. Sorry.

Well, where should I...?

$24.50. No receipt.

Oh.

Give me that.

How do you do that? The numbers?

How do you--?

You know before they even--

I'm terrible with numbers.

You got prices, you got totals.

How many can there be?

Do you have to train for that?

I mean, to remember all that?

Some special training?

Yeah. Right.

I'm too A.D.D.

I-I could never--

So you--

You really anticipate, right?

Oh, I mean, you're good.

You're really good. Wow.

Does the manager have to be that good?

I mean, with the numbers?

What about the other one?

Is she that good?

I mean, she's not pulling in the customers.

Why, no.

Not while she sits on her ass!

But then, I guess you don't have to work

if you're fucking the manager!

Kiss it.

Bitch.

That puta gets the gold lane

and does shit.

And I carry the floor.

You tell me how smart I am.

Well, I wasn't aware there were lane distinctions.

You are looking at them.

Ten items or less?

You been standing there.

You see one jerk not try to push the count, huh?

Always a fight.

So this is the less desirable lane.

This?

This is where checkers come to die.

Look at this.

Look at-- Even the register sucks.

Ugh.

You know, in Italy, they give long receipts

to pretty woman as a come-on.

Toll-takers on the highway.

Sort of a projection of length, if you know what I mean.

Why are you here?

I was hoping to see the manager.

But I guess he's not here.

I don't know. Why don't you ask her?

No, no, no. It's okay. It's-- It's cool.

What did you want with him?

I'm just doing a little research.

You're a cop?

No! Ha! No, no.